


Timid Seasons

by Dwarva



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Anxiety, Awkwardness, Drabbles, F/M, Nerves, Romance, Slow Burn, oh the awkwardness - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-08-28 05:47:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 55,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8434027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dwarva/pseuds/Dwarva
Summary: Using the 30 Day Stardew Valley Challenge from Tumblr to explore the relationship between Farmer Rae and the most adorably shy small town Doc we know...Warning: they're both awkward as hell and annoying in how long they take to realise their feelings and do anything about it.Slow burn is an understatement.





	1. Successful Harvest

"I grew a strawberry!"

The excitable voice came from a slightly dirty looking young woman with thick black hair that was knotted on top of her head. She thrust the tiny fruit towards Harvey in a hand mottled with soil. She was, indeed, holding a small red berry that could have passed for a strawberry. He made a non committal noise and pushed his glasses further up his nose as he nodded at her in the same way he reacted to a similar outburst from Jas or Vincent. 

"Uh huh. Who are you?" He knew the entire community of Stardew Valley. Every single one had checked in to his clinic at one time or another, so the newcomer's sudden appearance flustered him more than usual. 

"Oh!" She dropped the berry into the woven basket she carried in her hand and set it down on the ground in front of the clinic's flower beds. "I'm Rae. I've just moved into my grandfather's farm. I must have missed you when I came into town the other day to visit the store for seeds." She grinned through her rambles and the sparkle didn't leave her eyes even as Harvey smiled and nodded politely. "I was a bit of a city girl before I moved here. Never grown a thing in my life and now look at me!" She stretched her arms out and slapped him on the shoulder with an exuberant hand. "Oh my goodness I'm sorry!" She tried to brush the soil off his jacket but the muddy handprint refused to budge and instead his arm became even thicker with dirt as she tried to get rid of the mark. He wiped it himself and gently moved her thrashing hand. 

"Don't worry - I'll wipe it off once I'm indoors." He gestured to the clinic.

"Oh you're the doctor?" The smile returned as she scooped up her basket and looked up at the building that housed the clinic and Harvey's apartment. "Well I'll be coming here most days so I'm sure I'll see you again soon." She headed into Pierre's store and waved with her basketed arm, threatening to send the contents scattering over the path. "See you later Doc!"

Disappearing into the store Harvey felt as though a tornado had passed by him in the last few moments. Had it even really happened? The lingering scent of soil and berries assured him it had...


	2. Unlikely Friendship

“Don’t talk to me.” Shane’s dark features didn’t flinch as he walked away from Rae towards the bridge to the Joja Mart. She had her back to Harvey so he couldn’t see the expression on her face but watched as her shoulders dropped and she fiddled with her hands nervously. Spinning around she locked eyes with the doctor and a noticeably fake smile emerged. 

“Morning Doc, how you doing?” Her tone was measured but the glassy look of her eyes betrayed her feelings. She was doing a good job of holding back the tears but was clearly inexperienced in not easily winning someone over. Harvey had only spoken to her a handful of times and already couldn’t help but mirror her grin when she was around. But this time the forced smile made his stomach jolt.

“I’m OK.” He gestured towards Shane’s vanishing figure. “Look, Shane isn’t the easiest of people to get along with. Really - don’t take it personally. He’s like that with virtually everyone in town; in fact I think he’s only ever said more than two words to me when I’ve been giving him his checkup.”

Rae nodded and moved her feet around on the muddy path. “I know. I just figure everyone needs a friend. It doesn’t seem like anyone in town other than Marnie and Jas even know much about him.” She sighed and wrapped her arms around the grubby green shirt she was wearing. “No one can be happy being alone like that, can they?”

The words cut Harvey. There was no malice or motive behind them but she could easily have been referring to him. The loneliness was crippling at times and she was right, having only everyday friendships with his fellow townspeople was starting to feel increasingly hollow. He’d long questioned whether he truly felt part of the community and Rae’s comment had made him question it even further.

"I guess not.” He finally admitted. 

“Well then I’ll just have to try harder and see how I can help him.” Her tone grew more thoughtful. “I understand if it’s me he doesn’t like I guess…” Harvey opened his mouth to speak but didn’t really know how to respond. He couldn’t imagine anyone not liking Rae’s genuinely sunny nature. She somehow managed to be perky and upbeat without being overbearingly chipper. He shook his head.

“It’s not you Rae. There’s a lot of personalities in this town and Shane’s made it clear he doesn’t like anyone.”

“Yeah I know.” She nodded and started to walk towards the path leading to the farm. She stopped to turn back and shrug. “But I stand by what I said: no one’s happy living a solitary life.”

Harvey silently agreed as she disappeared through the trees.


	3. Rainy Day

Harvey wasn't a fan of the rain. One of the added bonuses of living right above the clinic was that on days like today when the water bounced off the ground and created mud that caked your shoes he was quite able to stay inside from wake to sleep. 

Despite this, after Evelyn had been given a clean bill of health on the thundery summer afternoon, he did offer to walk her home. He did it every time she came in for a checkup and she always said 'no thank you doctor' with a wry smile. A customary 'are you sure' followed that day because of the heavy rain but, again, she declined politely. 

As she hobbled off slowly towards her house he stood at the door and grimaced at how wet she'd got in the moments it had taken her just to move across to the other side of the General Store. She didn't even look back though and ploughed through regardless. He rolled his eyes tenderly and went to pull the door across but hesitated as he saw a standing figure in the distance. 

The rain created a haze that made it difficult to make out the person, especially since they weren't moving, but the subconscious but familiar hitch in his stomach betrayed their identity. He lifted his coat over his head as a makeshift hood and jogged out of the clinic, pulling the door closed behind him with his foot.

It wasn't until he got close to her, standing in front of the river, that he questioned why the hell he'd actually left the warmth of the clinic. He reassured himself that he was concerned for her, standing there alone, but knew it was the exact same compelling force that made him want to speak with her whenever he saw her walk appear.

"Are you OK Rae?" She spun around, lifting her dripping hand to her heart theatrically. 

"Oh my goodness what a fright," she laughed. "I wasn't really expecting anyone else to be out here in this rain." She turned back to the river and wrapped her arm around his waist, pulling him in and pointing at the river. Between his arms being aloft and her fingers around his middle he suddenly felt very exposed and was grateful for the coat casting a shadow across his face that might have masked his deepening blush. It was typically of her to do something like this innocently with no real thought as to how it might look. 

"The fish are jumping." She whispered, her other hand stretched in front of them, indicating at the water. "They think the raindrops are insects so they all come to the surface. A shame really when they realise there's no feast to be had." She looked around at him, their noses suddenly very close. He watched as a raindrop ran from the tip of her hat, onto her nose where it clung for dear life. He wanted to brush it off but despite her easy attitude to closeness it still felt too intimate. 

"Um, yes." He breathed coffee imbued hot air into to her face and she smiled. "Are you really just out here watching the fish?"

"Oh I mean I was out at Clint's," she paused and Harvey felt an unwelcome wave of jealousy that he tried hard to disregard. "I had some weird rocks for him to look at that I found in the mine. Then as I was passing the heavens opened but the sight of the fish was too interesting to pass up. Don't you think?" She looked at him keenly.

"Uh, yes. Very...compelling." She didn't notice the indulgent tone and instead removed her arm from him and took a step back, grinning. 

"Better head back to the farm and make sure those new crops aren't getting too washed out." She waved at him as she walked away. "See you in better weather." She joked. 

It didn't take long before she was out of sight. Harvey shook off the thought of her raindropped nose and the slight scent of herbs that she carried around with her and sprinted back into the warmth of the clinic. He looked up to see that Maru had appeared back from her break as he closed the door and dropped his sodden jacket into the basket by the door. 

She looked at him quizzically. "What were you doing out there in the rain?" He moved towards the stairs to grab a change of clothes before heading back to do some paperwork in his office. 

"Watching the fish jump Maru. Obviously."

He was too busy already starting to undress to notice the bewildered look on Maru's face.


	4. Night at the Saloon

The doc intrigued Rae. She definitely had a soft spot for slightly awkward people but Harvey wasn't unpleasant or difficult in his awkwardness. It was just...adorable. There was no doubt that there was appeal to Alex's confidence or Shane's 'don't give a shit' attitude but there was something different about Harvey. Good souls were tricky to find. But then maybe working Joja had just made her cynical, she mused. 

So on the mid spring evening while she was sitting at the bar, nursing a slightly warming pint of beer while quietly trying to figure out how to build a furnace from the materials she was collecting, she was surprised to hear the door open and see Harvey walk into the bar. It just didn't seem like his sort of place. But hot on his heels was the nurse that worked at his clinic and Rae snapped her head back round to her drink, her enthusiasm at seeing him sorely deflated. 

Rae couldn't actually remember what the nurses name was in fact. Mary maybe? Why hadn't she made an effort to get to know her like she had with the other townspeople? From what she remembered people spoke well of her but if she was honest with herself she just didn't really care as much. She couldn't pinpoint why. 

Rae heard a chair being pulled out at a table behind her as someone sat down and the approaching footsteps of another. She clung her hands around the beer and before she could start up an awkwardly forced conversation with Gus she felt a warm body siding up to her. 

Definitely not Harvey. 

"Hey Gus. A beer and a coffee please?" She turned to Rae. "Hi, I'm Maru. I've not really had a chance to welcome you to town. Are you settling in OK?" Her tone was genuine and warm but Rae felt an uncharacteristic desire not to engage. 

"Yes. I am thanks." Her tone was clipped and Maru's smile faltered somewhat. "Just dandy." Rae made sure her own smile didn't meet her eyes and went back to sipping at her beer. Gus handed her unwanted companion her drinks and caught him raising his eyebrows. The nurse nodded her head and mumbled something about seeing her around as she walked back to the table where Harvey was presumably waiting. 

"Want a fresh one Rae?" Gus had gone back to drying glasses and stacking them behind the counter. "You've been supping at that one for an hour. It's probably flat." 

"Sure, thanks Gus that would be great." 

"So," he started, pulling the beer tap towards him. "Not a fan of Maru then?" His tone was guarded and Rae suddenly felt like an outsider again. Of course the barman was going to be wary of Rae over someone he'd known for years. 

"I'm sure she'll be right fine without me as a fan." Rae made sure her tone was softer when she spoke across the bar with him. She notched her head back towards their table and learned in slightly. "She's got plenty fans anyway."

Gus nodded knowingly. "Yeah the doc sure is sweet on her isn't he," he chortled

Rae swallowed the lump that had gathered in her throat and her lips pursed. So it wasn't just Rae that could see it. A sudden realisation that Harvey and Maru were clearly involved and the sudden announcement of his feelings in such a matter of fact way had hit her harder than she thought it would. Gus placed the beer on the counter in front of her. 

"Actually Gus I'm going to head back to the farm I think. Add it to my tab and send the beer to Pam with my regards?" She didn't wait for an answer but spun round off the stool and kept her eyes low as she headed for the door. She briefly lifted them to see Harvey sitting with Maru at a table by the door and watched as he opened his mouth to speak. She didn't wait to hear what he said as she opened the door into the mild spring air and left the whole stinging situation behind her.


	5. Flower Dance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've taken some liberties with this but the general events remain the same

Rae really loved to dance. Finding out about the Flower Dance was probably the most excited she'd been since she arrived in Pelican Town. But, when the day made its appearance it was nothing more than a colossal emotional letdown. 

The festival had begun easily with gentle group conversations among the spring flowers with the warm evening air bringing a reminder that summer was near. Even Shane seemed to be soothed by the get together and had swapped his hoodie and jeans for a shirt and formal pants. Well. Formalish. When the letter had arrived a few days before Rae had envisioned a large informal gathering where people drank, ate and generally enjoyed each others company while having the occasional dance, but when Lewis informed her it was a more ceremonial event with a barn style dance that required a single partner she was less excited. 

Rae stood with a recently purchased dandelion in the pocket of her only dress and wondered who to approach first. She wouldn't necessarily have minded remaining alone, observing the townspeople but it was clearly a social event that required mingling. She looked upfield to where Harvey stood uncomfortably next to Maru in a blue suit that didn't do much for his reddening face. He shifted from foot to foot and thumbed the plastic cup he'd been given an hour ago but that still sloshed some of its contents onto the ground every so often. Maru, on the other hand, moved her body rhythmically along with the music that was playing. The formal white dress that many of the women seemed to be wearing looked devastating against her dark skin; even Rae couldn't deny that. She silently longed for the same comfortable confidence Maru seemed to be blessed with. Instead she forced the bubbly personality that people assumed she'd been born with in an attempt to cover up the self doubt that plagued her. 

Rae lifted her cup to drink the last of the juice and, for a moment, thought she saw Harvey's eyes dart over to hers. But by the time she the cup was lowered his eyes had moved back to the crowd of townspeople in the forest. Or perhaps he'd never been looking at her at all. Why would he? She tossed the empty cup into the trashcan by Pierre's stall and mentally braced herself as she moved towards Harvey and Maru. Penny had joined them and the nurse was in deep conversation with her about teaching the kids about robotics. 

Rae stood nervously for a moment while Harvey and she exchanged coy smiles and Rae gestured to the crowd of people.   
"It's a cute tradition." She blurted, nodding her head probably a bit too vigorously, something she'd admonish herself for later when back at the farm. "Do you take part?"

Harvey took a deep breath and nodded. "I'm working up the courage to ask someone to dance with me." His eyes moved over to where Maru spoke animatedly to a politely smiling Penny. Rae didn't even attempt to mask her disappointment. 

"Oh, of course. Maru...." She trailed off. Well that was it. Adequate confirmation that they were together, she figured. She wasn't even sure why she'd got her hopes up to be honest. He was clearly smitten with his colleague and lover and Rae could see why. Standing next to Maru made her feel even more ridiculous. There was Penny and Maru with their pristine white dresses, perfectly styled hair, relaxed laughs and clever conversation...standing next to a Farmer. An overly perky farmer with a grubby mark on her dress that she hadn't seen until she was already in the forest. "I better... um" She indicated towards an empty space and moved away toward the middle of the meadow without waiting on a response. 

"Hungry?" She asked. Shane was standing in front of the buffet table, cramming as much bread into his mouth that he could handle. 

"Unk..." He nodded, chewing the food noisily and piling more cheese and meat onto his already loaded plate. Rae leaned across to choose a piece of cake but Shane made a muffled noise and used his free hand to bat it away, pointing to the cookie plate sitting further up the table. Through a series of muffled sounds Rae guessed the cookies were the superior choice. 

"I take it you pretty much just come here for the food then?" She joked, taking a bite of the cookie and raising her eyebrows in appreciation of the chocolate chips and oatmeal. Shane swallowed, pausing for a moment to sigh. A satisfied look spread across his face. 

"Yeah. It's pretty much the only reason I'm here. Well, that and watching the obvious dread of people asking each other if they want to dance. That's pretty good too." Rae wasn't sure if he'd seen the exchange between she and the doctor but Shane hooked his tower of food towards Elliot and Leah who were standing by the river across the meadow. "Look at her. Desperate for him to ask. And he's just as desperate to ask her! But they'll take nearly an hour of small talk and chatter before they actually get to it. Ha. Suckers..."

Rae couldn't help but look across to Harvey and Maru. Penny had left to get the children some food and Maru was nodding, presumably at Harvey's request to dance. Rae toyed with the idea of just leaving right there and then. Maybe she could go back to the farm and just live as a hermit other than coming into town to sell her wares. Sure they'd probably tell stories about her but was that really any worse than being forced to constantly be confronted by the one person she wanted but who didn't want her? As she looked around the townspeople it seemed as though everyone was coupled up. Elliot and Leah were standing far too close to one another for just friendship, Alex and Hayley were making very unsubtle eyes at one together and established couples like Pierre and Caroline were using the opportunity to relax and enjoy one another's company. 

The wind changed suddenly and the salty smell of the ocean hit Rae's nose she gently elbowed Shane in the side, giving him a sideways glance. 

"I mean, you're going to dance with me right Shane?" She pretended to hold back a smile which became genuine when she saw the sudden discomfort on his face. He opened his mouth to speak but coughed, choking on a piece of food as Rae slapped his back. She couldn't help but laugh herself. "I'm kidding Shane, don't lose your lunch." As he regained his composure he rolled his eyes and shoved another folded piece of meat into his mouth. 

"I won't be dancing this year." She whispered quietly to no one in particular, her eyes reddening with realisation.


	6. Marnie Brings a Pet

At first Harvey didn't even know what had made the cry. It sounded like a high pitched whine but as he swung his head around towards the bridge he couldn't pinpoint its whereabouts. Just the wind he figured and shrugged, lifting his book back to his chest and relaxing back into the seat. Well, as relaxed as you could get on one of the stiff wooden benches by the town square. He looked around at the still town. No movement other than very slightly dancing leaves on the uppermost parts of the trees and the slight smell of the salt from the ocean air. The sun had gone down behind the hills but the streetlamps had lit and Harvey's eyes didn't have to strain. 

He dipped back to his book but as he reread the first sentence of the new chapter the noise cut through the evening again. He still couldn't identify it but at least this time he knew he'd actually heard it. And it wasn't the wind. He slipped the bookmark between the pages of the tired book and pushed it under his arm, standing and staring around. It was twilight and no one was around except him. No one he could see anyway. So what the devil was making the weird sound?

Probably a sign from Yoba to stop reading the damn book and actually go see some people, he reasoned. The lights outside the tavern were lit and welcoming but the temptation to go home and have a long soak with the rest of his book would always win out against the exhausting trouble that was socialising. The prospect of sitting in the thick aired bar with its clunky jukebox sounds and slightly too busy Friday night atmosphere made him cringe. But he was the one always complaining about being lonely. Couldn't very well rectify that without spending time with people right? He started walking over. 

"I'll go in for one beer and then head home, best of both worlds." He muttered under his breath and reached out to open the tavern door. Maybe Rae would be there and they could finally sit and chat, maybe even address the fact that they hadn't spoken since the Flower Dance. But before he could head into the tavern a small figure bounded towards him, knocking him off balance and knocking his book into the contracting puddle by the flower bed. Looking down as the water tide mark grew over its cover he rolled his eyes towards the heavens. "You really don't want me to read tonight do you?"

"I'm so sorry Harvey!" Rae sounded panicked as she ran up and grabbed at the beast that had run into him. A dog? He shook off his daze and looked down to see a small golden Labrador sitting, starting up at him with no less than an extremely pleased grin on his puppy face. "I'm still trying to get his recall under control so I don't have to worry about him on the farm. I honestly don't even know why Marnie thought I'd be a good owner for him." She looked down at the dog with a frown. "His name's Basil but frankly I can think of a few more choice names for him now I know him a bit better..."

"Is it replaceable?" She asked, bending down for the book and water seeping from the inner spine as she shook it. The colour drained from her face as she looked at him with dread. "It wasn't one of Gunther's was it?" He shook his head and smiled. 

"Just a paperback." He looked down at Basil who seemed to be a bit calmer now that Rae had finally managed to catch up with him. "So I guess it was you I heard whining just now?" He asked him. 

"Yes," Rae nodded as she clipped the leash onto Basil's red leather collar. "He's still getting used to being here. I don't even know where Marnie got him from but she warned me he was skittish. She wasn't wrong either. He's spent every waking hour since he arrived this morning either worrying the chickens or whining by the front porch. I'm honestly not sure what to even do with him."

"I'm sure he'll settle eventually. You know how pets are - it takes them a while to get used to a new place. Just like people" 

"Yes I guess so." Rae smiled. "I've never had a pet before but I'm sure it will help feel less alone on the cricket filled nights out there on the farm." Harvey desperately wanted to echo back his own pain at the problem of wanting to be alone but its inevitable resulting empty feeling. Instead he nodded sympathetically. He liked Rae but there was still a part of him that recalled too clearly how standoffish she'd been on a couple of occasions. His feelings on her were torn; he didn't like how she'd treated Maru but simultaneously had moments where he wanted to brush the messy hair from her face and lean in to smell her reassuring scent. He didn't trust those feelings though. It wasn't so long that he had similar feelings towards Maru, though those were far more simple and fleeting thoughts and had faded considerably since Rae had come to town. 

The thought struck him hard. He hadn't realised his feelings for Maru, superficial though they'd been, had all but gone since the farm had been taken over by the newcomer. He stared back at Rae, suddenly feeling very emotionally exposed even though the farmer clearly hadn't noticed his epiphany. 

"Sometimes all we want is to be alone with someone, right?" He looked at her earnestly as Basil started sniffing the ground around his feet. He shifted, convinced the dog was about to cock his leg against his own. 

"Well," Rae started, a sigh heavy on her breath. "If you ever want to be alone together you know where I am. The farm is a great place to pretend you're the only person in the world, like it or not!" She tugged at Basil's hand with all her strength and smiled at Harvey. "See you later Doc." 

She lead Basil up towards the store and the sodden book felt very heavy in Harvey's hands. A dozen realisations hit him like a freight train. But the biggest made his moustache twitch which was never a good sign. 

He really wanted to be alone together with Rae.


	7. First Animal

"Don't suppose you treat pets do you doc?" Harvey looked around from behind the clinic reception to see Rae carrying a fat, brown chicken that he could have sworn was frowning. "Marnie doesn't know what's wrong with her and I know animals aren't your thing but I wondered if you had a weird medical sixth sense that might help?"

"Um, no." He begun, shuffling some papers around under the counter. "And I'm not sure a doctor's office is the best place for poultry. Don't they get mites or something?"

Rae opened her mouth in mock indignation and put her free hand over the top of the chickens head. "Don't say that - she'll hear you! She's had a hard enough morning as it is without you upsetting her. She's entirely mite free I'll have you know." She rolled her eyes with a smile on her face and ruffled the back of the chickens head.

"So what's the matter with her anyway?" Harvey leaned in slightly but kept a careful distance. Rae's chickens were known for their bad temper and inclination to peck at anyone who wasn't the farmer herself. "She looks OK to me."

She sighed. "And I guess that's why you're not a vet Doc. Old Red here is normally the happiest darn fowl this side of the city. But Basil decided to show her who was boss after she escaped the coop this morning. I'm sure he thought he was just herding her but she got a bit of a fright and won't stop following me everywhere now. I just wanted to make sure he hadn't nipped her or anything when I wasn't looking. Do you think chickens get PTSD?" Rae tucked her further into her arm and Red started to quietly cluck.

"I suppose not. Well you probably shouldn't get too close to them Rae. You're not really thinking of them as pets are you? I wouldn't want you to get too attached. It's not easy when....you know."

Rae lifted the chicken above her head and looked up at her with a gentle smile on her face. "Most of them, no. They're just farm animals. But Red here was my very first animal when I got to the farm. Before I even got that damn hound that attacked her. She's special. She used to snuggle by the bed and everything."

Rae's eyes were focused on the bird but Harvey couldn't help but look at the warmth on her face and smile at her. Every time he spoke to Rae another hidden facet of her personality surfaced. The affection she showed the animal was exactly the same as the way she looked at anyone she met. No safe distances. No barriers to protect herself. She was truly an open book and Harvey realised that he'd trusted her from the first time they'd met in that whirlwind conversation about strawberries. It was a far distance from the own empty relationships he'd formed since moving to town and he deeply envied the hopeful way she viewed the world.

In the short time she'd been here she'd already turned Shane's attitude around, something Harvey didn't even think possible. And she'd done it for no reason other than knowing something was bothering him that she needed to help fix it. A fleeting thought about her fixing him wasn’t unwelcome. 

Rae's looked back down to Harvey and a harsh red flush flowed across his cheeks as she caught him staring. He swallowed and his mouth twitched nervously. Snuggling Red back up in her arms she smiled at Harvey.

"Thanks anyway Doc. See you later?" The door tinkled as she left and Harvey could have sworn he heard her mutter something about the nurse being lucky.

What did Maru have to do with anything?


	8. Good Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this has been delayed. The last three weeks have been crazy busy but I've not given up on our favourite bumbling couple to be...

The library was quiet apart from the irregular tapping sound made by Gunther who was evidently still using the 'index fingers only' method of typing. 

Rae had found a small sunlit corner of the museum with a padded stool and had settled down with a copy of a book she'd found called 'How Deep Do The Mines Go?'. Frankly it wasn't the most riveting of tomes she'd ever sat down with on a summer's afternoon but since the day she'd realised she's been wrong about assuming there would only be one hundred levels to the mines she'd grown frustrated and swore to herself that she wouldn't be excavating any longer until she had concrete evidence. 

That was a week ago. And every morning she'd woken from a fitful sleep with only a dim memory of a dwarf whispering to her that she was 'very close'. Now she was determined to reach the bottom if it killed her. And it might well if her last encounter with a lava bat was anything to go by. 

Her immersion in her book meant she didn't hear the approaching footsteps. Instead the shadow passing over her page causing her to look up to see what had caused the sudden halt in her reading. 

Harvey must not have noticed her tucked into the corner, she figured. He stood, browsing books in the fiction section until he reached one with a deep red cover and pulled it from the shelf. She toyed with the idea of sitting silent until he noticed her but was sure her uncomfortable shuffling would give her away eventually. She'd have to whisper to avoid him jumping out his skin. 

"Hey Doc." She whispered.

He jumped anyway. 

He raised his hand to readjust his glasses though they'd barely moved when he startled. "Oh Rae. I didn't see you hiding there." He quickly pushed the book he'd removed back into the stacks and Rae made a mental note to find out which one it was later. She rose to her knees and a pain seared through her leg, causing her to cry out. 

"Are you OK?" He asked, his eyes trailing down to her leg. "Are you hurt?"

"Oh just an old mining injury." She laughed and rubbed her leg through her jeans but he didn't return her smile. Instead he looked.....cross? She'd never seen him angry so wasn't sure how to gauge it but he certainly didn't find any humour in her joke. The sun disappeared behind the summer clouds outside and they found themselves in the shadows. The temperature dipped almost instantly as the warm sun was no longer on her face. 

"Rae, I know it's none of my business but you really shouldn't be going down there." She opened her mouth to respond but he held up his hand. "I know there's a lot of coin to be had from mining down there but it comes with a risk that I'm....you....shouldn't be comfortable taking." His cheeks flushed slightly as he obviously worried whether he'd been too firm with her. She'd never seem him like this. Well, only once when he'd been exasperated with George for not taking his medication but never with her. Never this openly concerned. 

She stood up fully but because of where he'd been standing she was mere inches away from him once upright. She considered taking a step back but worried he'd be offended. Instead she leaned even closer in and touched his upper arm reassuringly. 

"That's really very sweet of you Doc but I'll be OK. I was kidding about the mining injury it was just a little cramp from sitting down too long. I'm not going to lie it's definitely a little risky but I've been talking to Marlon and we've worked out a system and I'm not going to go any further until he's with me." She felt his shoulder relax under her touch. "But I really do appreciate your concern. Maru really is lucky to have you."

His brow furrowed. He seemed to hold back for a moment but eventually it spilled out. "You've said that before. What do you mean?"

"Well, you know. It just must be nice to have such a kind and caring boyfriend." His entire body tensed and Rae dropped her arm. "Oh, sorry, her husband? You think being here as long as I have been that I'd have got the real lay of the land wouldn't you."

"Yes. You would." The tension melted and he started to laugh. Rae had barely even seen him smile, never mind the great heaving belly laugh he was doing now. She smiled at him but was certainly confused. 

They didn't hear Gunther approach but he poked his head round the corner, gave them both a stern look and held his fingers up to his mouth in an exaggerated shush face. As soon as he disappeared back round the bookshelves they both dissolved into laughter, even harder this time since they were trying to do it silently. As their laughter dissolved Rae realised she'd relaxed even further into Harvey, probably a bit too close given his circumstances. He smiled at her. The slight awkwardness was still there but it wasn't the barrier it had once been. Rae had made her peace with his lack of availability. She wouldn't go as far as to say her feelings were gone but she'd realised she didn't want to pine over a man she couldn't have and had taken a step back from both he and Maru.

"Rae, Maru and I aren't a couple. I mean I admit I did, sort of, at one point..." He cleared his throat as he realised Rae's expression had suddenly got a lot more serious. "But that was a while ago. Maru and I are just good friends. And colleagues. Nothing more. Really." He emphasised that last part a little too much thought Rae but she just found it a bit endearing. She couldn't help but let out a little wry smile. The intimate atmosphere created by their closeness and the lack of light made her skin prickle and she licked her lips involuntarily. 

"Ah OK. Sorry about the confusion." She thought she heard Gunther's shuffled feet reappearing so spoke lower. "Well, I, uh. Wait. I've mentioned about you two being together to people and no one's corrected me. That's odd."

Even in the dark Rae could see Harvey flush deeper this time. "Well I might have been understating my feelings before. My one sided feelings." He clarified. "There was a time where I suppose I really would have liked Maru and I to be more than friends but it's clear she doesn't see me that way. And she's too young for me. And it wouldn't be appropriate and.....she's not....." He took a breath. "Sorry I'm rambling."

"Rambling in the right direction though Doc." A grimace appeared on Rae's face as she realised something. "I've not exactly been as nice as I might have been to Maru I guess. I should apologise."

"Why haven't you been nice to her?"

Rae shot him a raised eyebrow. Was Harvey really this oblivious? Part of her wanted to just shrug her shoulders and go into exquisite detail about how she thought about him constantly. How she thought of excuses to walk by the clinic to the point she'd been worried he was going to think she was a hypochondriac. How she tried to figure out what cologne he wore because it instantly gave her weak knees and a comforting feeling she couldn't quite place. 

Instead she shrugged. Outside the sun emerged from behind the clouds and the room was bathed in warm light once again. 

Rae gripped her book and gave it a shake, stepping back into her own space. "I better head home. Basil's going to think I've abandoned him." 

"Rae, did you avoid Maru because you were....?" He trailed off, not able to say the last word in case he was completely off the mark and made a fool of himself. But the vague question instead gave Rae the perfect excuse to be honest. 

She started with another shrug but it ended with a smile and a nod. As she walked towards the door she heard him whisper.

"Oh."


	9. Happy Birthday

He'd never seen her with her hair down before. Normally her black tresses were tied up in a messy knot on top of her head but today they flowed over her shoulders and down her back in waves. Harvey stared at her for a moment, transfixed. The only thing that gave her away was the slightly too short denim dungarees she liked to wear with those brown sandals. The late afternoon summer sun shone down on benches in the square and other than the rustle of the wind through the bushes and the murmuring of the discussion Rae was having, it was a typically quiet day in the village. 

Harvey gripped his fingers tighter around the glass bottle and debated not going over to her but as he was deciding she actually might not want to see him she swung her head around, hair spinning around her face wildly, and caught his eye. 

No going back now, he supposed. Instead he smiled broadly and waved, walking over to her as she stood talking with Leah. As he approached the women hugged and Leah waved at Harvey as she walked away. 

Now it was just the two of them. No pressure...

"Happy birthday Rae!" He called as he approached. Her face froze and the smile vanished. He watched as she looked around, presumably for nearby villagers who might have heard his greeting. 

"Uh. Thank you. How did you know it was my birthday?" She played with her ends of her hair nervously. Harvey couldn't help but think it was adorable, despite the discomfort that was clearly causing it. 

"It's on your medical records. Your thirtieth? I didn't want it to go unmentioned." He leaned in and whispered. "Sorry did you not want anyone to know?"

She shook her head and crossed her arms. "Sorry no it's not that at all. I'm coming across really ungrateful. Thank you Doc." The noticed though that the smile was forced and the bottle suddenly felt much heavier in Harvey's hand. 

"I got you a gift. Just a little token thing. I mean it's nothing really and if you don't like it I won't be offended if you wanted to take it back to Pierre's and see if he'll change it for something that's a bit more..." He handed her the bottle and suddenly wished he'd bought her something more meaningful and personal. But Gus had assured her she'd asked for this particular type of wine a couple of times and had been disappointed when he'd admitted he'd have to order it in for her. 

"Thank you! It's my favourite. I love red wine. You think Gus would let me borrow a couple of glasses and we could enjoy this down at the river?" When she looked at him expectedly it was Harvey's turn to freeze in his tracks. 

He hadn't really anticipated this. He thought he'd run through virtually all of the possible scenarios in his head but most of them involved Rae thanking him, making small talk and then her leaving. But as she asked him it suddenly seemed like the most 'Rae' thing she could have done. Of course she'd want to share her gift with him. 

"I....uh....sure....?" He babbled and wrung his hands gently before self consciously grasping them behind his back. She gave him the bottle back as she jogged across to Gus' bar, her free hair waving in the breeze. He held the bottle, slightly stunned as he tried to come up with a list of things they could discuss while they were together. Alone. 

Oh Yoba. 

After he'd only reached four possibly topics of conversation she reemerged from the bar, two stacked white boxes and two plastic red tumblers in her arms. She peered over them down the steps and strode over to Harvey proudly. 

"He gave me some plastic cups from the Luau! And I may have slipped it in there that it was a birthday present so he gave us some takeaway spaghetti and bread to share too. Dinner?"

Oh Yoba. 

They strolled down towards the river, chose a spot near the bridge and sat on the warm ground, spreading out their impromptu meal and smiling at one another nervously. 

Rae opened one of the boxes and offered it to Harvey along with a plastic fork she'd obviously also managed to swipe from the barkeep. Steam emerged from the box and the scent of herbs filled Harvey's nose, making him aware of how hungry he was and how long it had been since he'd eaten anything more than coffee and day old bagels. He twisted some pasta around the prongs of his fork and scooped it into his mouth. A grateful sigh emerged from his mouth as he chewed. 

He nodded towards the wine bottle as he swallowed. "Might be tricky to open?"

Rae paused in her own eating, placed the box on the ground by her outstretched legs and pulled a corkscrew from her front dungaree pocket. Harvey couldn't help but smile. 

"Carry one of those around all the time do you?" He tore a piece of bread from the breadstick and dipped it into the sauce before popping it into his mouth. Maybe he wasn't going to need any of those possible conversation subjects. Talking with Rae was just easy. She made everyone feel so relaxed, the doctor especially. 

"No," she grinned. "I asked Gus if I could borrow one." She tapped it gently against the side of her head. "Not just a pretty face Doc."

No, but that's not to be ignored, thought Harvey. 

"This is actually a really lovely way to spend my birthday. Much better than last year." Rae picked her box of pasta back up and munched a bite of her own bread. 

"What did you do last year?" 

"I sat at my desk at the Joja Corporation and typed for ten hours then went home and went to bed." She pulled the bottle towards her and separated the two red cups that were stacked together. He watched as she put the bottle between her knees and sunk the sharp edge of the corkscrew into the cork. Twisting it round with just a little effort and pulled the cork out with a satisfying pop. 

"You didn't have any friends or family who wanted to do something special with you?"

"Uh no." She poured some wine into the bottom of both cups, handed one to Harvey and gave her own a long and satisfied sniff. "Work didn't leave very much time for socialising and while my parents are much happier now I'm doing something 'significant' they were less than impressed by me joining Joja. My father is Grandpa's son and he grew up on the farm. Working for Joja was definitely sell out material and he really lost a lot of faith in me for doing it. It caused a lot of arguments and for a while we stopped talking altogether." She took an initial sip, a grateful expression on her face, and took another large gulp of the liquid. "I wasn't making the best of my future he said. But the bills needed paying and the food needed eating and most jobs in the city mean you end up working for Joja in some shape or form. I guess you've never had any of this though. Can't imagine anyone looks down on someone for going to medical school and becoming a doctor huh?"

He laughed slightly under his breath and took a large drink of his own wine. "I wouldn't be so sure. My mother wasn't exactly thrilled about me coming to work for a tiny clinic in a tiny town by the ocean. Waste of eight years of expensive medical school she says. And she says it a lot. My younger brother is a scientist in the city, probably working for Joja in some way or other like you said, and he's most definitely the family success story. So yeah. You can't win Rae. Someone's always going to be looking for ways to say you're not doing good enough." 

The atmosphere between the two had got a little deeper and bleaker than he'd intended. Just as he decided to go ahead with one of the safe topics from his pregenerated list he felt warmth on his outstretched hand on the grass. He looked down and saw Rae's own hand blanketing his own. 

He wasn't nervous. If you'd told him an hour ago this would happen he'd have come out in hives at the thought of her holding his hand. But actually, now, it just felt like the most natural thing in the world. He looked at her green eyes and and the sudden realisation that this might be more than a light infatuation dawned on him. 

"You're good enough Harvey. More than good enough." She said earnestly. "You've got a kind soul and that shows when you work and when you talk to people. That's so much more meaningful than being some hot shot scientist in the city. Plus, you know, you have an awesome moustache. Does your brother have an awesome moustache?" She deadpanned. 

A throaty laugh emerged. "No. He doesn't."

"We'll there you go. Pretty sure that means you've won in the brotherhood stakes." Her eyes glistened as she looked at him and every nerve in Harvey's body stood to attention as he felt a physical tingle between the two. 

He lifted his hand and wrapped it around her own. She couldn't hide her own surprise as she squeezed at the gesture. 

"Thanks Rae. You're a good one."

They sat in silence. Their food now cold and untouched but the wine warming their bellies and giving them just enough courage to be honest with one another. 

"Yeah." She nodded. "Definitely better birthday than last year."


	10. An Afternoon Fishing

How did he even get sucked into this? She'd asked if he liked fishing. He'd said no. And yet still he found himself walking over the bridge towards the beach, listening to her explain the difference between a spinner and a bobber with a genuine enthusiasm he couldn't help but admire. He was nodding along politely and earnestly but really wasn't sure what most of the words were that she was using. The one shining light would be that they'd have some time, just the two of them and frankly there were a lot worse things than fishing he'd put up with to have that. 

He kept thinking back to their recent impromptu dinner and how completely familiar it all felt. How he'd felt her hand in his for hours after she'd gone back to the farm and he'd retreated back to the clinic. Frankly she could have asked him to do virtually anything after that and he'd have agreed readily. 

She hitched the long equipment bag up over her thinly vested shoulders and turned to him. "So what do you think?" 

_Oh no. What had she asked? What was a safe answer?_

"I'm not sure....what do you think?"

"Oh I'd probably start off with the spinner and see if you catch a bite first?"

"That sounds pretty sensible."

_Dodged a bullet there_ , thought Harvey. _Stop getting sidetracked and listen to what she's saying._

The trees cleared and the smell of the salt water filled his nostrils. Between the gentle lapping of the waves, the rich sea air and the sun warming his face he couldn't think of anywhere he'd rather spend time with Rae. He suddenly felt warmer beneath his usual outfit of shirt and jacket and wished he'd decided to wear something more weather appropriate. 

He looked at her and watched as a smile that reflected his own thoughts emerged on her lips. She notched her head towards the clearing and they emerged on the beach, their feet gently sinking into the fine sand. Normally when Harvey ended up at the beach he got frustrated by the sand in his shoes, the incessant sound of the gulls and the skin whipping wind but today those things seemed far less annoying. 

Rae's loose black hair billowed around her heart shaped face and he stared at how she seemed to soak the sun and sea air into her soul. There was a glow around her and as she turned to him he had to snap his eyes downwards. _Nope. Not there either_ , he thought, as his eyes locked on her tanned, bare legs. 

He discovered quickly the only problem was the beach was not exactly empty. Elliott and Leah sat with their feet bare, trousers hitched to the knees, nursing what looked like glasses of whisky and chatting animatedly about something Harvey couldn't make out. Penny was sitting with the children examining sea shells off by the rock pools. They were being relatively quiet apart from the occasional peppering shriek from Jas as the water creeped up on her legs. Harvey reassured himself silently that both groups looked far too deep in conversation to bother them but still pointed towards the west side of the beach, furthest away from any of the visitors. 

"Maybe we should start over there? We don't want to, uh, interrupt anyone?"

Rae nodded. "Sure. Let's see if the fish are biting over there. The sun is going down there too so it might be a little cooler."

They walked over and Harvey helped her unpack the bags of fishing equipment. He watched carefully as she put the line on the reel, mounted it and attached the purple spinner to the line above the hook. She handed him the rod where he passed it back and forward between his hands anxiously. The innuendo of him being left holding his rod was not lost on him. 

He laid it carefully in the sand as he shrugged off his jacket and pulled his tie loose; it was cooler in the shade but the air was still heavy with heat and, again, he admonished himself for being too frightened to wear anything other than what Rae had always seen him wearing. As his jacket fell to the sand a momentary panic overcame him as he nervously checked his shirt for sweat patches but, despite the heat and his nerves he seemed to have escaped unscathed. Luckily Rae's back had been turned through this and she didn't see his slight attack of nerves. 

Rae finished preparing her own rod and was just starting closer to the water when the loud greeting echoed across the beach. 

"Hey Rae!" They turned to see Emily and Haley headed towards them, kitted out in swimsuits and carrying towels and icy water bottles. "Are you guys going for a swim too?"

An image of Rae in a bathing suit entered Harvey's mind and he had to work hard to erase it, focusing intently on the fishing rod he'd lifted back up to distract himself.

"Not today," Rae replied, lifting her own fishing rod. "Just going to show the Doc here the finer points of angling!" 

The women turned and looked at Harvey as though they hadn't noticed him standing there and gave polite nods. 

"Ah OK." Emily grinned. "If you guys want to join us afterwards we're going to cool off in the water then bake ourselves in the sun."

"I hope you're wearing sunscreen?" Harvey muttered under his breath.

"Of course Doc." Haley reassured, switching the frozen bottle of water into her other, warmer hand and waving with the other. "We're all over it. See you guys later!"

The sisters walked off down the slight incline towards the waters edge and Rae dipped her hand into the bag, lifting out her own bottle of sunscreen. She propped the rod up on the bag and started to squirt the lotion into her hands, then began to cover her bare arms with it. Her skin glistened at the contact and as she started to smooth it over her neck and shoulders Harvey looked away again, fiddling with the line on his rod.

_Stop it. Stop it. Stop it._

Rae finished up and lifted her own rod, heading over to the waters edge where Harvey stood gently dipping the hook onto the surface of the water. 

"Ready to get started?" Harvey nodded. "Excellent. So the first thing to remember is..." 

She stopped abruptly as Jas ran under the outstretched rod, followed soon after by Vincent. A slightly huffing Penny who was evidently finding it much harder to run in the sand than the children, arrived shortly afterwards. 

"Sorry Doctor. Rae. The children seem far more interested in playing than learning today."

"Can you blame them?" Ribbed Rae.

She sighed. "I guess not, no." Penny offered them a slightly forlorn look that Harvey had seen too many times as she lifted her dress slightly and chased back after the laughing kids who had decided to run rings around Elliott and Leah instead. Rae smiled as the writer's drink sloshed into the sand and he scowled at them as he tried to save the remains of it. 

"Anyway," Rae started again. "The first thing to remember about fishing is to pick the right bait depending on the water and the season. Since it's summer and this is ocean water we're probably best to use this kind." Rae kneeled down again and produced some purple bait from a plastic tub in her bag. 

Harvey's stomach lurched at the smell but he was determined to show Rae he was able to do this. He reached out and copied her method of securing the bait to the hook with only a tiny scratch to his own finger. 

Rae looked across with admiration. "You're a natural Doc."

"Must be all those years sutchering?" Harvey reasoned. "So, uh, what's the bait made from anyway?"

Rae suddenly looked away and shrugged. "Oh let's not get into that." She looked at him timidly over her shoulder. "It's been a bit of a point of contention between us so maybe let's not look into it too hard?"

Ah. So the mine then, he realised. She was right though. Best not to get into that particular argument just now when he was trying his hardest to enjoy the afternoon. She brightened when she realised he wasn't going to pursue it and offered him a bottle of hand sanitiser. 

"Give your line to me while you swish your hands in the sea and then we can use some of this." He did as he was told and took the offered bottle to clean his hands. Picking the rod back up he stood next to the edge of the water and realised Rae had left her own rod lying against the bag and was coming closer around him. As she wrapped her hand around his fingers that were gripping onto the rod above the reel post his mouth went dry and his entire body stiffened as she closed in and he felt her skin touch his. In that moment he worried about a number of things momentarily. Was she going to get even closer? Were his hands sweaty? When was the last time he'd cleaned under his nails? 

"Just move your fingers a little up here." She instructed and guided his fingers so they were no longer over the reel post. Her hands were warm and as she covered his hand with her own Harvey couldn't tear his eyes away from the contact. He realised he didn't care if his hands were sweaty, he wanted her hands to stay there forever. Her fingers seemed to linger on his but he wasn't sure if he was imagining it or if she was enjoying it as much as he was. She pushed her thumb along his until he was holding the rod like a handshake. She'd had to stand on her tiptoes to look over his shoulder slightly but sank into the sand as she did which made her reach her head up, exposing her neck. 

"That's it." She turned her head to look at him but didn't step away so their noses were practically touching. He could feel her breath on his lips and swallowed hard. 

"Maybe..." He started. But before he could even decide how he was going to finish the sentence they heard stomping sandy footprints approaching and he looked back towards the sound with a mixture of frustration and relief. Rae sighed loudly at the interruption but as her head turned to Shane who was standing three feet away looking at them with a slightly ashamed look on his face, she softened. 

"Sorry guys I didn't...uh....I mean it's cool it can wait. Sorry I didn't know you were.... Never mind." He apologised and started away but Harvey realised it couldn't have been nothing for Shane to come searching for him. He reluctantly untangled himself from Rae's closeness and gave her a sheepish look. If it had been literally anyone else who'd come over he wouldn't have given it a moments thought before letting them walk away. But Shane was in a bad place and Harvey couldn't face the possibility of helping him slip away to... well. Whatever Shane might do. His face had been ashen and his expression empty. As Harvey watched him trudge his sunken shoulders heavily towards the path back to town, his hands dejectedly stuffed into his pockets, he made a decision he would almost certainly regret later. 

He handed Rae his rod clumsily and moved back from where she remained fixed in the sand, looking at him with a sad smile. "I'm sorry Rae. Maybe try again this weekend?" He stammered. She nodded and pushed the hair from her face with her free hand as he bent down for his jacket. 

"Go make sure he's OK? If you need anything....?" She offered. Harvey nodded and started after him, wrapping his jacket around his shoulders to try and erase the feel of her touch which remained on his skin.

He called to Shane to wait and the dejected man stopped and peered back. Harvey saw a look of relief on his face that he hoped Rae would see as explanation for his sudden exit. He looked back himself and offered her a grateful look that she mirrored as he jogged up closer to his patient, propped his glasses further back up his nose and settled back into Doctor Mode.

"So....did it happen again...?"


	11. Storm

Another loud crack sounded outside, followed a few moments later by a flash of lightening that lit up the inside of Gus' flashing shadows on the bear statue that stood looming in front of Rae's booth. 

Every time it happened her shoulders tensed and she unconsciously held her breath until the lightening cleared. She wasn't sure why it terrified her like it did. She assured herself she was rational enough to know that the likelihood of her getting hit by the lightening was tiny but still, the raging storm that inevitably arrived heralding the end of the summer, brought little but panic attacks and evenings with the duvet piled on top of her and her quietly crying. 

Her drinking companion looked at her with a mixture of confusion and sympathy. "You're not scared of the storm are you?" Abigail leaned in closer, eyes narrowed and Rae couldn't tell if she was teasing or not. The purple haired woman took a long drink from her wine glass and smiled. "I quite like it. It's quite....you know?" She did an exaggerated shudder with an excited smile on her face and Rae nearly choked on her drink. 

"Really?" She squeaked. "It's terrifying..."

Abigail belted out a throaty laugh. "No it's not! It's carnal and awesome and sexy." 

Any possibility of Rae thinking Abigail was actually a nice normal girl evaporated at that point. She shook her head good-naturedly as her friend sat back in her chair. "I bet Sebastian likes it too..." she said wistfully, knocking back the last of her drink. Rae's eyes turned to the tall, slim totally unassuming man playing pool with Sam who seemed to be oblivious to Abigail's less than subtle advances. About as naive as a certain doctor she knew... She rolled her eyes at her own eternal pity party and took a large swig of her own drink. 

As the bell chimed on the old oak entry door to the saloon Abigail's eyes lit up with mischief. Rae stretched her head round to see who'd come in from the storm but knew the only person who would illicit such impishness she knew it was going to be Harvey. Nothing else caused that level of playful look on Abigail's eyes than the thought of playing the game of making two already awkward people even more awkward. 

"Hi Haaaaaaarvey." She drawled, standing up. Rae's back was to the doctor so he didn't see the scowling look she was firing up at her friend. "Can you keep Rae company? I was just about to go and play the winner." She shook her empty wine glass at the pool table and before Harvey could answer she'd made the slightly tipsy journey over to the other room. 

Rae spun in the booth seat and looked up at Harvey with unintentional doe eyes. "Don't worry Doc. I'm sure you had plans. You don't have to keep me company." He looked at her for a few moments, his expression strained, and his moustache twitched ever so slightly. 

He pointed at the bar. "Actually I just came to drop something off with Pam. Let's just say it's generally the best place to find her." The pair looked across to the bar where Pam's curls could barely be seen over the top of the bar where she was resting her head. 

Rae nodded and stood up. "I was actually going to head home myself. So, don't worry about not staying." 

As she lifted the glass to finish the dregs of her wine another explosion of thunder filled the air and, faster than the last time, was soon accompanied by a blast of white light that highlighted Rae's terrified expression. Her chest heaved with ragged breaths and she gripped her nails onto the side of the booth. She was shivering by the time Harvey rested his hand on her arm. 

"Rae..." He leaned in and, while Rae might otherwise have been leaning right back and enjoying his closeness, she stared right past him to the window and her voice shook.

"I'm honestly OK Harvey." She lied. She grabbed her scarf, wrapped it around herself a few times and moved her empty glass from the table to the bar. "I'm going to head home now. Bye." She moved so abruptly that Harvey could barely drop the package by the half asleep Pam's head on the bar before he chased her to the door. 

The bell was the last distinct sound Rae heard as she pushed the door open and Harvey ran out after her. "Rae!" He shouted over the rain and she looked back at him, tears clear in her eyes despite the heavy downpour. She looked back at him, rabbit in the headlights expression, as thunder clapped across the sky and she stared at the sky, chin slightly trembling. 

Harvey followed her down the stairs and wrapped his arm around her as the lightening flash lit up the entire village. Rae gripped onto him with . There wasn't even any time to feel embarrassed about either her self described 'overreaction to a little bad weather' or the fact that she was pressed up against the man she'd been thinking about constantly since the day in the museum. 

The wind roared past their ears and Harvey had to shout louder than he thought he ever had to make himself heard. "Rae let me take you home!" But she was too busy staring at the sky to even read the words from his lips. She tugged at his arm and he slipped his hand into hers as the wind whipped at their loose clothes. He fastened his hand snugly round hers and started moving away from the door, guiding her with him. When she realised what he was doing she looked at him and nodded, pulling her scarf tightly around herself with her free hand. 

Pushing in her to the gales as another, more rumbling barrage sounded above them, Rae spooned herself in closer. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kept walking as the flash appeared seconds later. She felt Harvey's hand slide under the bottom of her shirt slightly, his cool hand on her warm skin making her muscles tighten. 

The storm was close now she realised. She couldn't see more than a few steps front of her face as the rain pelted down violently and she realised she was completely reliant on Harvey knowing the way home. She momentarily thought of his poor glasses and wondered if he could actually see where he was going but felt completely confident surrendering control to him. He kept her held firm as she shuffled behind him for what seemed like hours eventually she buried her head into his back. 

Another crash vibrated across the sky, right above them now, and she heard him whisper close to her face. "Nearly there." She swallowed hard and nodded though she wasn't sure he'd even seen her. She looked up through the sleeting rain and saw the outline of the farmhouse appear through the horizontal rainstorm. As suddenly as the hail had begun it seemed to die off as the next thunder roll was more of a reluctant grumble than a roar. Only as the heavy rain dissipated into a thick drizzle she realised how closely she'd been holding onto Harvey and almost pushed him away as the fear ebbed away and embarrassment took over. 

He nudged the front door open and the two stood in the doorway, water pouring from their clothes and hitting the hardwood floor as Basil looked on with confusion from in front of the cold and empty fireplace. 

Rae looked at Harvey whose glasses were fogged from coming into the heat, his hair sodden and lank on his head and his entire outfit darker and full of rainwater. He and Rae stood silently looking at one another, the only sound coming from the dripping of their clothes as the realisation they'd been gripping onto one another for the last ten minutes hit them both.

"I, uh..." Harvey wasn't used to trying to fill the silence but was clearly worried about Rae more than he was his own unease. "Are you OK?"

"Oh Yoba..." Rae grimaced as she covered her burning face with her wet hands. She'd looked like a complete idiot in front of him. In front of the only person in the whole world she wanted to impress. Instead she'd shown him what pathetic child she was. "Harvey. I'm so sorry you had to bring me home. I don't know what happened. I don't remember seeing storms like that in the city" He looked at her and his own cheeks tinged red.

"As long as you're OK Rae...?" He stepped closer to her and she looked up at him, her hair plastered to her cheeks and boots filled with water. 

"I'm much better now." There was no denying the attraction between them both now as they stood in front of one another, chests touching and the raw emotion between them raising goosebumps on Rae's damp skin. Any question Rae might have had about whether Harvey knew of her feelings or returned them seemed like a distant memory as she leaned in for the impending kiss.

She tilted her chin up and watched as he lowered his face to hers. A rush of anticipation made Rae shiver as she closed her eyes and parted her lips slightly and...opened them again to see Harvey moving away, a look of panic behind his glasses

"I'm glad you're OK," he stuttered as he ran his fingers through his hair and shook the rainwater onto the floor, adding to the already growing puddle surrounding him. A distant clap of thunder muttered in the distance but Rae barely heard it as her body numbed with embarrassment from Harvey's rejection. She opened her mouth to respond but for the first time in her life, found herself speechless. 

The awkwardness only heightened as Harvey slunk past Rae and rested his hand on the door handle. She offered him a feeble smile as he opened the door against the dying wind outside. "See you soon Rae." And he pulled his soaking jacket tighter around himself, leaving her alone in the silence. Her mouth was still slightly open when the first humiliated tear ran down her cheek. _You don't deserve anything else_ , she reminded herself. He'd seen her for the nervous and anxious person she really was. He deserved better. She was, again, alone.


	12. Moonlight Jellies

The summer night breeze was welcome after three months of intense heat. It was always considerably cooler by the beach but the tickle of the air on her face made Rae grateful that the summer was passing and the cooler Fall was on its way. She was over the stifling heat. Fall definitely meant harder work, and she was conscious she wouldn't have crops to draw on in the Winter but part of her was still looking forward to relaxing cold evenings with her fire burning. 

The candles on the water fluttered with the gentle waves and danced on the very surface of the ocean. Rae had never seen anything as enchanting in her life as the dancing flames against the rippled water. A memory surfaced of how she'd spent the end of the previous summer in her tiny apartment with the guy next door who played his saxophone at 2am and then complained that the whirr of her shower heating in the morning woke him up. She didn't miss that so much. But now, watching the ocean and surrounded by people that she considered to be actual friends, she couldn't believe how much her life had turned around in six short months. Everything was great. Well, pretty much everything. 

She stood, arms linked with Leah on the edge of the dock and nervously looked around to see where the man in question was. He'd come to say hello when he arrived at the beach, said something about mosquitoes and had wandered off when Rae made it plainly clear she didn't really want to see him. She hadn't been rude but when he'd come over she'd given him an obligatory smile then turned herself away towards Leah who'd looked at her like she'd lost her mind. 

He'd taken the hint quickly. She wouldn't look back on it as her finest hour but it had taken her a few days of avoiding him to not relive the mortifying moment every time she pictured his face. She didn't really need his pity just now and decided, until she was fine about the whole thing, she'd just be polite and encourage nothing else til the feelings that bubbled to the surface every time she saw him started to dissipate. However long that might take anyway...

"So what's the deal with Harvey?" Leah asked her as she pulled her in closer against the cold. "Did you guys have a fight?"

"Worse...." she started but even the thought of admitting what had happened made Rae's throat tighten and her eyes glisten. Leah's eyes opened wider. "Let's just saw he's definitely not interested in, um, me and I hadn't realised how much I liked him until I knew that."

Leah unlinked her arm and wrapped it around Rae's back. "Are you sure? I mean I saw the look he gave you as he walked away just now. It wasn't the look of someone who didn't care."

"He's just embarrassed," Rae sniffed, trying to hold back the tears she was sick of crying. "It was utterly mortifying Leah. He leaned in, I thought we were going to kiss. I was obviously going to kiss him and....he looked at me like I'd slapped him and he walked away. Didn't even wait to say anything. Just....left."

"Oh honey. I'm sorry. Any chance you might have misread it?"

Rae snorted through the silent sobs. "Oh no. I leaned in, I closed my eyes and I was definitely angling for a kiss." She shook her head and shuffled her feet on a hole in the old splintered wood of the dock as the sick feeling returned from admitting what had happened that night in her house. "He must think I'm a complete moron." 

"He won't. Harvey doesn't think like that. I'm sure he'll just give you some breathing space for a while and then things will go back to how they were?"

Rae nodded. Leah was probably right but since Rae couldn't remember a time where she hadn't got butterflies when she saw him, or even when she thought about seeing him, she wasn't sure what it would be like to know he was just going to be a friend. And what would she do when he inevitably met someone? That thought and a thousand more had plagued her brain non stop in the last few days. 

As the two women stared out onto the ocean Rae heard footsteps behind her. Expensive, hand stitched leather footsteps. Evidently Leah could identify her friend's choice of footwear too as she greeted him without turning around. 

"Good evening Elliott." He sided up to them and Rae smelled the familiar woody cologne that the writer wore liberally. 

He brushed his hair behind an ear and gestured to the candles in the water and the lapping waves. "What an utterly superb sight eh? We're very lucky indeed to have this on our doorstep. Literally for some of us." He smiled his charming grin. 

"I'm paying my respects to another bygone summer." Leah sighed. 

The two shared a comfortable look and Rae detached herself slightly from Leah, wrapping her arms around herself slightly as the breeze picked up now the sun had set completely. There had been a time where Rae might have thought Elliott and Leah were more than friends but time had shown there was nothing there other than very easy friendship. Rae couldn't help but glance across to see if Harvey had gone to stand by the rock pools; maybe one day they'd share a similar friendship. Not soon though, she guessed. Not while she was still sore about their last alone encounter. 

She spotted him standing by the bridge to the rock pools, solitary and still, looking out to the ocean as the very last of the sun dipped below the horizon and the beach went dark. The only light now was cast on the water and the shadows cast were tight. Every instinct was telling Rae to excuse herself and go talk to him but the wound to her pride still pushed her to keep her distance. She was in control of her emotions, she reassured herself. She could simply decide to avoid him from now on and not have to deal with the sad way he looked at her as he pitied her obvious unrequited love. She couldn't imagine a time where she'd happily spend time with him without thinking about tugging down his creased shirt or putting her hand on his nervous knee twitch as they sat together or imagining how his moustache would feel if they kissed. Ugh. The last one just brought back the very specific memories she was trying to avoid. 

She'd promised herself she wouldn't tell anyone other than Leah. She knew the artist wouldn't pass along the excruciating tale but others, mainly Abigail, might not manage to be quite so discreet. So as Leah chatted quietly to Elliott there was no worry she'd tell him what they'd been discussing before he arrived. Instead she tried to take her mind off the memories of three days before and lose herself in the ambient chatter of the villagers enjoying the scene. But as she looked around everyone seemed to be standing in pairs. She rolled her eyes. That was going to be her: standing on the edge watching everyone else couple off while she lived a life of solitude on the farm. _Maybe she could get a cat or two..._

"C'Mon," Leah tugged Rae's arm gently. "Let's go stand up by Lewis. He lets off the candle boat and the first jellyfish always come up near the dock at Willy's shop." Elliott followed the women as they headed up carefully towards the beach in the dark. Rae couldn't help but glance over again to where she'd seen Harvey stand but he'd moved. For a heart wrenching moment she wondered if he'd gone home, not wanting to stand alone for the evening. But she looked down to the rock pools and saw him standing close to Maru and her parents.

_Double ouch, Rae. He doesn't want you but is quite happy to go stand with his old crush. Maybe he wasn't being entirely truthful when he said he was over her? Is that what this is all about?_

She shook her head and reminded herself she was here tonight to enjoy time with her friends. Not to wallow in regret at something she had no control over. Following Elliott and Leah as they made their way up the dock she watched as Lewis reached down into the water and lit the large candle sitting in one of the small tugboats. A gentle push later and it bobbed out towards the ocean before disappearing into the horizon. 

"What happens?" She whispered up to Elliott who was standing close between she and Leah. 

He looked down and winked. "Just wait and see my dear."

A few minutes passed and Rae was the only one getting antsy. The others said the exact same thing happened year on year and knew what to expect. But she stood, waiting impatiently, occasionally looking up at Elliott and Leah but both were oblivious to her impatience as they stared into the horizon expectantly. 

Just as Rae was about to ask if it normally took this long for something to happen, the horizon lit up with tiny beads of blue light. She looked up to see the reaction of her friends but they simply stared into the distance, their eyes twinkling with the reflection of the emerging glow and contended smiles on their lips. What had begun as a few lights suddenly burst into dozens that came floating towards the dock. The sea had gone from a dark and oily blue to fluorescent and glowing with a pale blue radiance. It was breathtaking. 

Rae felt a grin tug at her lips as the creatures approached the dock. Her mouth opened in wonder as the sea became a mass of blue jellyfish stars floating confidently towards the beach. She bent down as a green jellyfish floated towards the dock and paused in front of her. She wanted to reach down and touch it but settled for looking at it with a stunned smile on her face. It was the first time in days she'd felt happy. Felt herself again. Her eyes filled with grateful tears at the beauty of it all.

Rae instinctively looked up, her face masked with wonder to see Harvey's reaction to the spectacle. But he wasn't looking out to sea. His peaceful smile was firmly fixed across the beach. 

At Rae.


	13. Bad Planning

She knew Pierre's Store closed at five. She knew it was ten minutes to closing time when she packed up to head into town. She knew it took fifteen minutes to gather everything and walk. 

But she did it anyway. Yoba loved a trier. 

Huffing and puffing her way along the path with the overfilled baskets of produce, she was carrying too much to even check her watch to see if what time she had left. All she could concentrate on was the burning spasms in her arms from the weight of the baskets and the slight wheeze escaping from her lungs every time she took a step. Tempting though it was to stop and rest for a moment she knew time was tight. So when she cleared the path into town and caught sight of Pierre standing outside the door, turning the key in the lock, she wasn't quite sure where the burst of energy came from that caused her to run, full pelt, across the Town Square, jangling the baskets in her arms.

"Pi.....pi.....pi....." She wheezed as she arrived at the store, dumping the baskets so hard that two tomatoes rolled out their container and onto the stone paving. She didn't even stop to retrieve them. "Pierre can you open for two minutes to take these?" She rasped, determined to get it all out before she had to resume her fight for breath. 

"I've locked up." He said grimly and started to walk away. His expression was dark; Rae had never seen him with this difficult attitude. 

"I know Pierre and I'm sorry. It will really only take a few minutes. Or I'm going to have to lug this all back to the farm. Couldn't you even store it inside and I'll come back first thing to get the money from you?" She nodded as she said it, sure he would be grateful that she trusted him to keep the produce without any coin for it. 

He turned back to her, shoving the keys back in his pocket and tilting his head down bitterly. "I've. Locked. Up." He repeated and even when Rae protested slightly again he continued walking. Where was he even going? Normally after the Store closed he went upstairs and ate dinner with Caroline. It was very unlike him to break his regimented schedule...

"Low on the priority list Rae," she uttered to herself through ragged breaths. 

Rae's shoulders sank as she stared at the baskets and contemplated the walk home. At least this time she could take it easy and make stops where she needed. She bent over and grabbed the errant tomatoes, piling them on top of the overstuffed group already squeezed into the basket. She took a long breath and wrapped her fingers around the handles, mentally willing herself to pick them up again. 

"Do you want to leave them in the clinic?" A voice behind her asked. 

_Shit_ , she mouthed without moving. She really could have done without him turning up. Being all nice and helpful. Without turning around or standing she shook her head. "No I'm fine thanks. They're not that heavy." She lied. 

She desperately tried to lift the baskets without groaning but it wasn't to be. She let out a quiet but laboured moan as she lifted the baskets up and turned slowly to meet his gaze. He looked down at the containers and shook his own head. 

"Don't be silly. You can leave them here and come get them in the morning again. They'll be fine - no one will be here except me in the mean time?" He wrung his hands uncomfortably. 

"No. No thanks." She offered him a smile that didn't touch her eyes and took a step away from him so he couldn't see her strained expression. 

"In that case let me take one?" She placed them heavily on the ground. If he was going to draw this out she couldn't do it carrying a tonne of vegetables. She kept staring into the distance, away from him. 

"I'm really fine. Yes, it's hard but I'll be fine by myself thanks. I don't need your help." She spat. The last part might have been a bit harsh, she thought to herself. But if it was what it would take to avoid him she'd have to be a little mean. She felt him take a step towards her and she turned slightly to see him standing a half metre away, a bemused look on his face. He wasn't pissed off. He thought it was amusing. She clenched her teeth as she bent to pick the baskets up again. 

"If you won't let me help as your friend can I help as your doctor? You're going to hurt your back carrying all that weight."

_Goodness does the man ever stop?_

She grabbed one of the baskets, the lighter one, and gripped it with both hands. "Fine. Help me take it back if it's your advice as a medical professional."

The corners of his lips turned up and his moustache lifted slightly with it. "I think it would be for the best." 

He had the good grace to stay silent during the journey back to the farmhouse, apart from a few low fatigued moans of his own. Even a single basket wasn't easy to carry and Rae wasn't sure how she'd managed two. He was right, her back would have been killing her by the time she got back if she'd had both of them. Either that or she'd have taken until midnight. 

As they reached the farm and the porch was in sight Harvey picked up speed slightly, his jog to the end keeping him going as he cast down the load of vegetables by the front door. A few moments later Rae followed suit. They both leaned against the farmhouse, catching their breath before Rae evaluated how she wanted this to end. 

"Thanks." She said grudgingly. She looked at him, his cheeks pink with exertion and still taking time to catch his own breath. She couldn't help but let out a small laugh. "Wow Harvey you're in even worse shape than I am."

He nodded and took a gulp of air. "Yes. Maybe I need to be doing more exercise...."

"Well thanks." Her tone softened. "I really am grateful. Sorry for being horrid back at the store. I was just frustrated."

"With Pierre or me?"

She looked around uncomfortably at the bare ground that no longer homed the crops that were now in her baskets. She crossed her arms and gave a shrug. 

"You know...him. You. Both of you I guess. It doesn't matter."

He took a half step towards her, a concerned look on his face but clearly wary of the boundaries that had built up since the...encounter. He stopped and looked at his own slightly squirming feet. 

"It matters. I didn't want to hurt your feelings Rae."

Fury boiled up inside her and she snapped. "I'd much rather know where we stand Harvey." Her tone was harsh and final. She eventually looked up at him and saw the regret in his eyes. Regret passed over her briefly but she reminded herself she needed to stop thinking about how he felt and focus on her own hurt. She didn't like that he was uncomfortable around her now and that was too bad, but that didn't compare to the bitterness she'd felt over the last few days. "I get that you don't feel the same way that I do about you. That I did... And that's fine. I get it. And you saw me being the frightened pathetic mess I am the night of the storm and I'm just a farmer and you're a doctor and you can do better than this I know. So don't worry about it. I'll come and see you whenever I need a check up or whatever and we'll say hi at village events and smile at one another politely when we pass each other in town. And that's fine. That's what friends do, right?" " She'd intended it to be reassuring but as all the feelings of the last few days came out she realised she'd been rambling and really didn't want to wait for his response. "I'm going to head inside and have some alone time. Thanks for helping me bring the stuff back."

She closed the door behind her and let out the breath she'd been holding as she'd verbal vomited all over him. She rested her back against the door and slid herself down, sitting silently with her head in her hands. 

This was ridiculous, she told herself. He was just a man. Her life was made up of far more than this one individual. Why did she let him get to her like this? Why was she allowing him to dominate things? She was better than this silly broken down mess she'd become recently. And it was childish not to just get over it and be friends with him. Be normal with him. But every time she thought about being with him her entire body ached and she started to panic. Time would heal, she reassured herself. But it was going to take a while to get to that point in a village with fewer than two dozen people, all of whom were in one another's pockets. 

"Rae?" He whispered from the other side of the door. He must have heard her slide down because the sound was coming from right behind her head. "You don't have to say anything. You don't have to come out. I just wanted to say I'm sorry. Just so you know..." His voice trailed off as she pulled her knees up further to her face and wrapped her arms around her legs. 

"And Rae? You're not a mess..." He finished from further away.

This was going to get easier right?


	14. Forest Visit

A week had passed since he’d apologised to Rae and he was still to see her again. Given that she came into town most days to sell to Pierre and visit Robin he knew she had to be avoiding him. He’d spent time staring out the window at reception, telling himself he was worried for her but in reality knew he simply missed her and felt horrible about what had happened. The prospect of waiting on the high road to the mountains had crossed his mind but she’d rather not think of him as a stalker as well as an asshole.

He sat in silence, tapping a pen on the desk in time with the nervous tic in his leg, reliving the stormy evening for the millionth time. Why hadn’t he just kissed her back? She’d done the hard part, admitting she liked him which he’d been so utterly and gloriously relieved to find out. So why had be bailed when she’d put herself on the line like that?

Days of wondering had given him a lot of potential questions. Had he been scared of actually changing things between them? Had he decided in that moment he didn’t like her as much as he thought? Was he worried he wasn’t good enough for her and wouldn’t be able to meet her needs?

_Or was he just a damn coward and couldn’t actually step up when it mattered?_

Either way he was suffering for it now. Virtually every waking moment had been spent thinking about why he’d just left her without explanation and other, better ways the evening could have gone if he hadn’t been such a damn coward. A week ago Rae made it pretty clear she was taking control and was going to avoid him to protect herself. He couldn’t blame her frankly. If she’d embarrassed him the way he had her he was pretty sure he’d already have packed up his stuff, left town and been listening to some heartbreak jazz right about now.

He shuffled around some paperwork that was lying on the reception desk and shoved it into Maru’s inbox without thinking and shook his head.

_Stop thinking about it Harvey._

But he couldn’t. Grabbing his jacket from the coat stand he left the clinic and headed towards the forest and his next, unscheduled appointment.

The leaves on the path to the forest were starting to crunch underfoot as they drifted from the trees and he kicked them, furiously, as his brain ticked over the same questions again and again. If she’d just talk to him he might be able to know why he acted the way he did. But that wasn’t going to happen any time soon. She did best when she was left alone to stew and eventually work herself out of it but Harvey wouldn’t settle that way. He needed to talk it out and reason with her. Although he didn’t have any reasons to give her, he reminded himself.

_This isn’t exactly taking your mind off it you know_ , he reminded himself.

The sun was beginning to settle lower in the sky as he reached Marnie’s ranch and the sun cast a dusky pink glow over the building. He nodded to Willy who was standing on the edge of the lake fishing and his mind went back to the day by the beach where he’d been annoyed at only spending a short time alone with her. Now he’d give anything just to just have a brief chat with her. To explain…..something.

He knocked on the door to the Ranch and a few moments later Marnie invited him in warmly. She sat him down at the kitchen table and filled the kettle with water and tea before putting it on the stove and turning to Harvey.

“Here to check up on Shane?”

“Just to see him. I’m not his keeper; I just want to see if he’s OK.”

She shook her head sadly and turned to get milk from the cool box in the corner. “Maybe he needs to be checked up on Doc. He’s not in a good way just now.”

“I take it he’s here?”

“Yeah. He was sleeping earlier but then Rae came round and he’s been moping in his room since she left. I dunno what to do about it.”

Harvey’s attention suddenly flashed brighter when Marnie mentioned Rae’s name. A twist of guilt in his stomach surfaced as he realised this really wasn’t why he was here. He had to focus on Shane. He tried to sound casual but failed. “Was Rae round to see him?”

“Well sorta,” Marnie started, flicking the stove on for the water. “She came to see me about buying some hay during the winter and when Shane heard she’d come by he decided to come out. He gave me the old stink eye so I left them to it.”

Was Harvey actually jealous that Shane had spoken to her? He knew there was nothing going on with them, but their friendship had intensified over the last few weeks according to Maru. She’d mentioned to Harvey the pair had been seen drinking together in the saloon a couple of times which only served to frustrate him more. He shook himself internally. He was here to see Shane. To make sure Shane was OK. He simply had to stop thinking about himself and his own problems.

“Maybe I’ll pop in and see Shane before I enjoy some of that tea Marnie? It’s got to be a flying visit I’m afraid.” He pushed his glasses further up his nose.

“Knock yourself out Doc,” she gestured to the bedroom door. “I’m going to go check on the animals for a bit. I’ll leave your tea here all right?” She left the kitchen and Harvey rose and knocked on Shane’s door.

No answer.

He knocked again. “Shane?” He called softly. No answer.

He turned the handle and the door creaked open, the room was bathed in darkness as the curtains were pulled shut. The air inside was stifled and heavy and the scent of stale beer and sweat clung to everything like dust. The chink of light coming in from the hallway lit up Shane’s bed where he was draped face down over the duvet, his hands touching the ground, breathing heavily.

“Shane.” Harvey said louder. He was surprised the light in the room hadn’t woken him but clearly the man was in a very deep, alcohol encouraged, sleep. When he didn’t respond Harvey switched the main light on in the room. Shane wouldn’t like it but he wanted to make sure he was OK. He didn’t even stir and if it hadn’t been for the harsh breathing he’d have looked like a dead man.

Harvey looked around the room now he could actually see and grimaced at the sight. Empty beer bottles, pizza boxes and half eaten pepper poppers on filthy plates were scattered throughout the room and punctuated the stale smell of the room with their decaying odour.

Harvey stepped over the litter in the room and made his way over to the Shane’s sleeping form. He knelt down close to him and rested a hand on his shoulder.

“Shane?” He shook his arm and finally got a response.

“Ugh, Doc?” Shane’s eyes squinted in the light and he grimaced as he shoved his face back on the pillow. “Put the light off huh?”

“Come on Shane, sit up. Just a quick check?”

Shane opened an eye to Harvey and groaned. “I’m a bit strapped for cash just now Doc. Can’t really afford house calls.”

Harvey sighed and shook his head. “I’m not going to charge you Shane. Just sit up and let me take a look at you.” It wasn’t a request this time and Shane knew it. He awkwardly braced himself on his arms and swung his body round to sit up, his eyes rolling back into his head followed by a dry heave that Harvey moved away from. “Do you want some water?”

Shane nodded to the desk where a glass of water balanced on a pile of books. He offered it to Shane who gulped it gown greedily. As he did Harvey pulled the blood pressure monitor from his case and wrapped it around Shane’s upper arm.

“When did you last have a drink?” Shane didn’t even look surprised at the question. But then he’d admitted he was worried a while ago the day he got kicked out the saloon and couldn’t remember getting home. And that wasn’t the first time he’d lost an evening… Harvey pumped up the blood pressure monitor, put his stethoscope on Shane’s arm and checked the reading over his glasses as it deflated. High. No surprise there then…

“Uh about thirty seconds ago. You passed me it?” He replied sarcastically. Harvey rolled his own eyes and indicated for Shane to lift his shirt then placed the stethoscope on his chest. Racing. Again, no surprise.

He nodded to Shane’s stomach where he pressed his hands against his abdomen. Shane coughed and, when Harvey was done lay he back on his bed and closed his eyes again. “I much preferred my last visitor you know. She didn’t poke and prod me like you did.”

“Marnie mentioned Rae was here, yes. Does she know about all this?” He started putting his things back in the snap shut case and sat back on his knees as Shane offered him an empty look that gave nothing away. “Shane this isn’t going to come as a surprise but your heart rate is very high, too high, and your skin looks terrible. How often do you have five or more drinks at one time?”

Shane looked at him and shrugged. “Dunno. Yesterday. Day before that too. Let’s just say beer tastes better in large quantities…”

Harvey shook his head. “We have to do something. You can’t keep doing this. Come to the clinic tomorrow and lets have a proper discussion about it. Wouldn’t it be nice to wake up without a hangover every once in a while?”

Shane’s eyes glinted with tears and he looked away from Harvey. “Do you know what it’s like to be alone Doc? To literally spend your entire life waking up, working and coming home to be completely and utterly lonely. Without any real connection with anyone? To imagine your life as an old man and see yourself sitting, surrounded by strangers as you turn into a sad and pathetic dribbling wreck?” Shane shook his head angrily. “I’m nothing Doc. I don’t have anyone or anything except a lot of pressure and no one to talk to about it. So if a hangover is what it takes to forget some of that shit for a little while then I’m kinda all right with that.”

Harvey stared at Shane, silenced by his honesty. Should he admit to his patient that he felt exactly the same way? That going up to his apartment alone at the end of the working day was the hardest thing he’d ever done and he had to do it every day? Trying to think of things to do that passed the time before he could justify going to bed was mentally exhausting. He often tried to blame it on the fact that he lived in a small town but Harvey got the feeling this loneliness would follow him wherever he went.

“It doesn’t have to be that way,” Harvey reassured Shane sincerely. “We all go through times like this in our lives but I can put you in touch with someone who will help you realise you’re in control of it. You can change this for yourself.”

Shane rubbed his eyes with the back of his grubby cuff. “I wouldn’t even know where to start Doc.”

“I’m going to find someone who can help Shane. Come by tomorrow morning before your shift? I’ll open up early - no one needs to know you were there if you don’t want them to.” His patient nodded and Harvey patted him gently on the shoulder as he left Shane’s room.

He opened the front door, leaving the cold tea in his wake and headed north through the fields at the bottom of Rae’s farm. He pushed his way through the overgrown grass that she hadn’t managed to cut, jogged slightly around the pond and was out of breath by the time he knocked on her door.

_Seriously Harvey take your own advice and do some exercise?_

She opened it a few minutes later and looked at him, concerned for his dishevelled state.

“Harvey what’s….?” She looked at him, her green eyes wide with worry.

He dropped his case and stepped in closer. “I’m sorry about the night of the storm. I’m sorry I’ve not made a better effort to talk to you about it since then. But I was afraid and I honestly didn’t know why I acted the way I did. It wasn’t because I didn’t like you or was embarrassed about you liking me because….” He wrung his hands and took a deep breath. “I do like you. Not just as a friend Rae. You’re very special and you deserve someone special and I’m not sure that’s me so it seemed easier to just take a step back like a coward instead of telling you what I really thought. Which is that I do like you. Lots.”

He stared at her for a few moments. There was no tension between them and her anger had clearly melted away at his admission. She looked guarded though, as though she expected to there to be a ‘but’. But there wasn’t one. And he stood and looked at her earnestly before his own breath hitched and he realised she didn’t know what to say either. Was this how she’d felt the night she leaned in to kiss him? It wasn’t until he’d bared himself to her he truly realised what it had taken for her to admit her feelings that night.

He started again. “I suppose I’ve got so used to the feeling of being alone that actually the possibility of changing things really scares me. I absolutely hate spending every evening by myself in my apartment but the empty feeling just feels like a normal part of my life now and, horrible though it is, I don’t think I realised it might be just as scary to change that. But I’ve decided I want to be happy and I have to decide to make that happen for myself.”

She said nothing again but stared at the ground. Was this her gentle way of telling him she wasn’t interested in his sob story? After a few moments he nodded, realising she didn’t have more to say to him. He looked down, leaning to pick up the case. When he stood up she’d taken a step towards him, her eyes glistening in the dimming light and her pale lips upturned.

“Let’s try this again shall we?”

His entire body relaxed and he felt relief tingle his skin, He accepted her invitation into the farmhouse where the fire was warm, the music was playing and the company was just what he wanted. It was going to take some getting used to letting someone else in but they’d figure it out, somehow.


	15. Wild Animals

His heart beat faster when he came out the clinic to grab some lunch and saw her talking to Caroline and Robin. Seemingly gone were the days of avoiding her and getting worked up in case she spotted him across town. Now he flushed at the prospect of seeing her but headed towards the women anyway. Rae stood with them gesturing, her back to the clinic.

"Good morning," He smiled brightly but his face crumpled when Rae turned around and he saw her eyes red and puffy with tears and her sleeves slightly damp from rubbing them. "What's happened?"

"I'm being silly..." Rae sniffed. 

"You're not being silly!" Robin reassured her loudly. "I would be upset too if it had happened to me."

"What's happened?" Harvey asked again, more concerned this time as he crossed his arms around himself. 

"Wolves got into the farm last night and got a couple of the chickens. It was completely my fault; I must have left the door to the barn open a little and it got in and...well....two of the chickens didn't make it. The other one is so traumatised it took me an hour to get her down from the top of the nest." Rae huffed out a big breath and sniffed again. "It was really just such a mess and the poor things..." She held her breath but tears flowed down her cheeks again. 

He wanted to step up, engulf her in an embrace and hold her while she sobbed. But he froze in place and while he nodded sympathetically the look from Robin was clearly one of anticipation. He leaned forward to rub Rae's shoulder and the carpenter shook her head slightly. He looked away from her stare and back to Rae. 

"It's not silly to feel upset about this at all. In fact I'd be worried if you didn't. That would be pretty quick to get into the role of 'they're only animals' Rae." She nodded at him. 

"Maybe. I just don't know how I'm ever going to have livestock if I turn into a blubbering mess every time something happens to them. Maybe I should stick to the crops thing?"

"Don't underestimate yourself," Caroline smiled. "It's like being a doctor. You'd be a pretty shoddy doctor if you didn't get a little bit invested when your patient was having a hard time, right Harvey?"

"Of course," he agreed, stepping closer and moving his arm from her arm to her back. A move which prompted a sly look between Caroline and Robin. "And you're the sort of person that cares a lot. And it's lovely that you do. It really would be very Rae-like if you became a hard cynic." He joked. She looked at him gratefully and he couldn't help but smile back at her. They stared at one another for a few moments, almost goofy smiles on their faces until Robin cleared her throat. He realised his hand had slipped down and her hand was in his, his rough fingers wrapped around hers reassuringly. 

A week ago he'd have whipped his hand back, embarrassed, but now he realised his hand was perfectly comfortable holding hers. And while his cheeks might have pinked slightly at the thought of doing it in front of someone else he realised that actually, he was enjoying it too much to stop. She wrapped her hand firmly around his, seemingly forgetting the others were even there, and rubbed her tears away with her free hand. She certainly didn't seem to mind this public hand holding. 

In fact the four of them just stood there, in silence, for a while until Robin and Caroline excused themselves with bemused expressions on their faces. Rae and Harvey wouldn't remember saying goodbye when they thought back to it later. 

Eventually Rae looked down at their joined hands, eyes now only slightly red and definitely no more tears. She notched her head down. 

"You're holding my hand." 

He looked down as though he hadn't noticed. "Yes I am."

"Do you mean to be holding it?"

"Yes," he nodded. "I'm quite enjoying it actually."

She burst out laughing, the fluctuating emotions coming to the surface again and she shrugged. "Suppose we'll have to do more of it then."

He nodded. Hand holding was definitely a start.


	16. Town Museum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might have played a little fast and loose with the prompt for this one... ;)

"So do you know what it is?" She asked nervously. 

Gunther spun the artifact in his hand and lifted his glasses to look at it closer. "I think..." he begun, pulling out a book from under the museum counter and opening it to a dog-eared page, "that it's a tigerseye. Did you find it inside a geode?"

"Yes. Clint wasn't sure what it was though. It was in a lava geode I found pretty deep in the mines."

Gunther looked up at her, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "How far down have you gone?"

"The elevator said 106. I admit I thought the mines would only go down to one hundred so was surprised to find that ladder down then." She laughed. Her arms and chest were still matted with dust and the occasional red slime fleck. Her purple sword was still sling against her hip and her hair streaked grey with ash. 

"It's pretty daring of you to head down into the mines. It's not without danger you know..." His attitude was completely contrary to Harvey's. The doctor was continually appalled that she'd put herself at risk in order to collect 'some rocks and stones' and yet Gunther seemed to be positively enthralled that she'd go on such adventures. He smoothed his beard. "Would you like to donate it?" 

Rae giggled. "Do you need to even ask at this point?" The pair wandered over to the displays which mostly held items that she'd brought back from the mines or, occasionally from finding in boxes while fishing. She'd essentially brought the museum back from the brink. The day she'd gone in for the first time to ask Gunther's advice the place had been barren and silent but now the place teemed with new discoveries. The villagers came in regularly to check for new additions. 

Gunther placed the tigerseye on a copper plinth in the middle of the sunbathed room and they both stood back to admire the light glistening against the rock's golden exterior. As Rae pulled up her satchel and adjusted her sword to leave the museum Gunther turned to her with purpose. 

"Would you like to go for a drink tonight?"

She stopped and looked at him with bewilderment. The open room suddenly felt as though it was closing in. "A drink?"

"Yes. You and I. At the saloon this evening?" 

Rae's mouth hung open slightly until she realised she must have looked like the village idiot, gawking ridiculously. "I, uh..." she begun. She had never been asked out quite so directly before. Normally there was some awkward back and forth before either her or the other party made a thinly veiled attempt to invite the other out somewhere totally innocent in a way that could be explained away if the other person didn't feel the same. It was exhausting actually. 

He waited for her answer with no indication of nerves. This was a total contrast to the 'flirting' she'd been privy to recently. "I'm not sure Gunther. I...."

Realisation dawned. "Oh. Are you....are you seeing someone else?"

"No." She answered quickly. She wasn't. Technically. There was definitely the beginnings of something there with Harvey but nothing official. He'd admitted that he liked her the night he came to apologise but they hadn't really talked about whether things would progress from that. The pair had held hands but Rae was still questioning whether he'd just done it to cheer her up. Did he like her? Properly like her? She couldn't be sure. There had been lots of 'gentle indication' as named by Robin but the words hadn't been said. Rae didn't realise until that moment that she had been waiting for those words. 

"Or are you just not interested? Obviously...that's fine..." Gunther stammered. Visible stress started to seep in now she hadn't agreed as quickly as he'd clearly thought she might. But the reality was that Rae did quite like Gunther. They had a lot in common and generally spoke at length when she came into the museum with a donation. Looking back at the times they'd talked she could understand why he'd thought she'd immediately say yes. If Harvey hadn't been around she almost certainly would have. 

"It's not that, Gunther." Her eyes darted around the museum exhibits and her blistered fingers fiddled with the hilt of her sword. "I just, I mean there is someone, it's just that I don't know what's happening or if anything's happening and really honestly if it weren't for that..."

"You don't have to say that." He smiled gently. "It's OK. I've seen you with Shane and you can definitely see the chemistry there."

She barked a laugh. "Wait, what? No, no it's not Shane."

Gunther cocked his head and rubbed his beard again. "Oh. I'm sorry I just assumed. It's just that he's like a whole different person when he's around you so I just thought, well, if it was anyone...."

"It's Harvey actually." Rae spluttered rapidly.

"The doctor?" Gunther's face contorted in turmoil as he obviously thought back to times he'd seen the two together. He then gave a sympathetic smile, his hat tilting towards her. "I see. It's OK Rae. If you don't want to go out that's fine...."

"It really is Harvey." Her brow knitted together at the frustration that Gunther thought she was brushing him off with a lie. Were the two so obviously incompatible that it was impossible they'd be together? Was there really more clear chemistry between she and Shane than her and Harvey; the person she spent the majority of her waking day thinking about? She looked up at Gunther and realised the question of her joining him for a drink was likely moot now either way. She offered a polite smile, said her goodbyes and sorries and then headed back into the town. 

Outside the bridge was littered with deep brown autumn leaves and she crunched them under her iron boots in frustration. Rae pulled her leather jacket round herself from the chilling wind and squinted against the low sun. Gunther had planted a seed and there was no way Rae's overactive mind wasn't going to nurture it to death.

Were they so different? So incompatible? So inconceivable they'd be together?

She nearly walked into Penny, so lost in thought, but the redhead held her arms out to stop her. 

"Are you OK Rae? You were mumbling to yourself..." Penny's innocent gaze jarred her out of her bad mood. 

"Yes, thanks Penny. Gunther just made me think about something silly and now it's turning around in my mind."

"Did you want to talk about it?" The two weren't particularly close but Rae knew Penny to be kind and reassuring. If anyone was going to convince her that Gunther didn't know what he was talking about and that Rae was clearly meant to be with Harvey, the teacher would do just that. Normally she'd reserve such a personal question for Robin or Caroline but she needed an outsiders honest but rational perspective. 

"Well," she begun, not quite knowing where to start. Blunt was best, she decided. "Do you think there's anyone in town I might have a good 'connection' with?" She looked around uncomfortably. Best to leave the actual person out of it, she assumed. Then she'd get an unbiased answer. 

Penny fiddled with her hair and shrugged. "Well yes but Shane has a lot of baggage Rae. Just be careful if you..." She stopped when she saw the expression on the farmers face. "You weren't thinking of Shane then....?"

There was no doubt she and Shane did have a connection - a good one - but there was nothing romantic in it whatsoever. She assumed it was obvious but perhaps not. 

"Thanks Penny." Rae walked away leaving the teacher standing alone by the river. 

She didn't treat Shane any differently to, say, Robin or Emily. They chatted, they laughed. Well, Rae laughed while Shane sat slightly less grumpy than he had before she'd joked. She definitely saw something in Shane that the others didn't. And it hadn't just been because she was annoyingly persistent in breaking his difficult exterior. But could she imagine a future where the two were more than just friends?

She stopped dead on the path. She imagined she and Shane living together, working together on the farm, watching TV on a cold night in front of the fire. Doing.....things. It was the last one that sealed the deal. She definitely didn't think of Shane that way, no matter the way things looked on the outside. 

Looking up from her dazed walk from the river she found herself standing in front of the clinic. A glance at her watch showed it was nearly closing up time. Should she go inside and see Harvey? Reassure herself with the butterflies that came with being with him that the path she was pursuing was the right one? 

She walked up to the door and touched it slightly but pulled her hand back as though it was on fire. 

No. She knew how she felt. 

An image of an older, frailer Harvey, his moustache greying around his lined mouth, his glasses thicker and an easy smile aimed at Rae appeared in her mind and she recognised a warmth and comfort she'd never realised she felt.

She didn't need to see him. Old Man Harvey still gave her butterflies and that was good enough for her.


	17. A Helping Hand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short break through the holidays! Should be back on track now though. :)

The last thing she expected to see as she rounded the corner into the town square was a line of sick villagers snaking out of the clinic all the way round the side of Pierre's. At least six people were standing outside Harvey's office with varying levels of sniffing, coughing and sneezing. Rae paused for a moment and considered going back to the farm and waiting out the epidemic that had obviously hit the town. What good would it do anyone to get sneezed on and become sick herself?

Robin was at the front of the line she could see; the redhead's foot wedged firmly in the doorway to keep the door open; her arms wrapped around herself with a blanket over her shoulders. Even from a distance Rae could see her nose burned bright crimson and the hacking cough coming from her chest sounded hoarse and painful. She looked up to see Rae in the distance and offered a feeble raised hand that might have been mistaken for a wave had she been firing on all cylinders. 

Behind her Rae could see Evelyn, George, Caroline and Emily as well as some other huddled figures in the back she couldn't quite make out. Harvey definitely looked like he could do with a hand with this extra workload. Sighing at her own inability to just walk away she strode forward, taking one last deep breath of 'clean' air before entering the danger zone. 

"You sound awful..." she shouted to Robin over the sound of her wheezing cough. The carpenter nodded but twisted her arm again and barked a few times into the crook of her elbow. A few gulped breaths later she looked up at Rae, her eyes bloodshot and her skin pale and clammy. 

"This damn cough feels like it's coming from my toes, Rae." She looked around and her shoulders fell. "Seems like everyone's got it. Demetrius is back at the house. He said he's not coming into town until we're all better. Maybe you should think about heading home too?"

Rae looked back along the line of patients and saw everyone shared the same vague symptoms. Some were making more of an effort to shield their cough than others as Robin looked back at Sam with daggers. "Cover your mouth when you cough Sam. Jeez...."

Sam just rolled his own red eyes and sniffed a gurgly, wet snuffle. Rae looked back at Robin sympathetically. "I'm going to head inside and see if I can help." Her friend nodded weakly but was overcome with another attack. Rae wasn't sure she'd actually heard her. 

Robin held the door open for her and she entered the clinic and wasn't shocked by the sight inside. Waiting at the head of the line were Sebastian and Abigail who were slouching, barking their own coughs in front of a very dishevelled looking Harvey. A glance to the waiting room area saw Shane leaning against the wall while Marnie comforted a wailing Jas who was clearly not taking her illness very well as she alternated coughs with whimpers. On her other side was Gunther with his hat pulled down right over his eyes, his white pale and scarlet nose hiding under the shadows as he sat with his legs splayed and his body leaning over as though he might vomit. 

Rae pushed gently past Sebastian and Abigail slightly who didn't even move. They both had their heads down and Rae could see tears trickling down Abigail's freckled cheeks. She hoped it was just a reaction from coughing so much but put affectionate hand on her shoulder anyway. 

"Harvey?" She called softly. He only noticed her then and looked up, his eyes filled with relief. 

"Oh Rae, are you OK? How do you feel? I wanted to come by but, well, as you can see I've been busy!" His tie knot was loosened and his shirt was pulled wide at the neck. His forehead was beaded with sweat and his glasses were askew on his nose. It might have all been quite adorable under other circumstances but Rae didn't feel much beyond sympathy. 

"Where's Maru?" She asked at the sight of the empty chair in front of her.

"She's out sick too. She wanted to come in and help but could barely stand, never mind help people." As Sebastian begun a sneezing spell which ended with a few barked coughs for good measure, Harvey wrote his name and gestured to the chairs. "Go sit down Sebastian. As soon as I've seen Jas and Shane, you're next."

"Uh, Doc what am I? Invisible?" Gunther looked up from his haze of illness and coughed a little under his own breath.

"Damn," Harvey began, rechecking the list in front of him. "I forgot to write you down Gunther. Sorry Sebastian. I'll get to you as soon as I can." Sebastian just nodded sadly and slumped down in the last seat by Gunther. "Sorry Abigail. I've got to go see Jas. I'll check you in as soon as I'm back?"

The purple haired girl stayed silent and her head bobbed gently. Rae guessed talking might have been more than her low energy levels would allow. 

"Harvey let me help. I'm feeling fine and I can check people in and give them an idea of how long the wait is?" Rae looked at him expectantly. 

A spark of life appeared in his eyes. He pushed up his glasses and ran his hands over his face, colour starting to reappear in his pale cheeks. "Rae that would be incredible. In fact, as long as you don't mind, could you find out from people if they've started coughing yet. If they haven't and they just feel rough, ask them to go home for now. If they're not coughing they'll manage out until tomorrow. Tell them to go home and get some sleep. I'll do some house calls tomorrow?"

Rae nodded and gave a mock salute as she picked up the notebook with Harvey's illegible scrawls all over it in smeared pencil. Harvey led Jas and Marnie though the back to the exam rooms while Rae turned over the notebook page and started fresh, writing down the names in the order he'd told Sebastian. She flicked on the kettle that Maru kept next to the desk for her coffee and grabbed some cups from the water cooler. By the time she'd rewritten everything down, including Abigail, and told her to have a seat the kettle had ticked over. She rummaged under the counter and found the green tea bags she knew Maru liked. Reminding herself to replace them she popped bags into each cup, poured over some hot water and placed a half a dozen cups of tea onto a folder to act as a tray. She propped it onto her hand and the notebook under her arm as she went outside to the cool autumn afternoon. Outside everyone was either sniffing or coughing into their cuffs as she moved along the line, offering out cups of tea, writing down names and triaging per Harvey's instructions. By the end she'd halved the line by sending home Caroline, Pam, Gus and Haley with some tea and an order to head for bed. The others were visibly relieved that their names had been taken and they'd be seeing Harvey soon. 

Moving back to the clinic with a plan in place she saw Jas emerge from the back rooms with a sucker in hand, her expression far less sombre than it had been going in. Her tears had been wiped away and she smiled up at Harvey and thanked him as Marnie ushered her out with her candy. 

He looked up at Rae who held up her notebook and assured him all was under control. She thrust a cup of tea into his own hand which he gulped down readily. 

"I haven't stopped since I came in this morning you know?"

"Everything out here is under control. You just worry about seeing patients and I'll keep the rabble in check." She winked at him. 

"You're invaluable Rae, you know that?" 

"I have heard that yes." She joked. "Shane's up next."

Harvey nodded and called to him to come through the back. She watched as the doctor put a reassuring hand on Shane's back and guided him through to the exam room. Her gaze and slightly goofy smile might have lingered a little longer than she intended as she turned back and saw incredulous looks from Gunther and Sebastian. 

She cleared her throat and headed back behind the desk, tidying the mess that Harvey had obviously made in his earlier panic. 

\------

"Was Lewis the last?" Harvey asked as he came back from seeing the mayor off home with orders to go to bed with some painkillers. He looked around gratefully at the empty room. Rae stretched out slightly in Maru's chair and nodded. 

"He was indeed. Good work doctor." Harvey came back and leaned against the desk by Rae, rubbing his eyes behind his glasses. 

"Thank you so much for your help Rae." He wrung his hands carefully and shuffled against the counter. "This afternoon really would have been much more difficult if you weren't here. I just hope you haven't got sick as a result. I was sort of hoping staying at the farm, away from all the sneezes and coughing might have saved you from the brunt of it."

"Nah," she smiled. "I like being in the firing line Harvey."

He smiled down at her and, after a few silent moments, Rae rose from the chair to stand next to him. Her brow furrowed and her lips pursed. She lifted a hand to Harvey's brow and felt the clamminess from earlier had turned into a full on sweat with what felt like an emerging fever. His skin was sallow and his eyes dark.

"How do you feel?" Her tone was concerned.

He looked at her as though he was going to lie but, instead, gazed at the floor nervously. "Uh, honestly I feel terrible."

"Oh Harvey you lummox." She smiled at him sadly. "Come on. Up to bed."

"You don't get an offer like that every day...." He murmured under his breath. He stopped harshly as he realised the words had actually come out of his mouth. She let out a cackle and turned around to see his face melt into a dark red shade. "I, uh...." he stammered. "Sorry Rae. It's....uh....the fever?"

She laughed again and linked arms with him, guiding him towards the stairs to his apartment as he started to cough loudly himself. 

"You know one day I will offer and I hope you don't react the same way then." She said quietly. He didn't hear her as the coughs dissolved into a sneezing fit. As he straightened he asked her what she'd said. 

Her eyes twinkled with mischief. "Never mind...." she replied.


	18. Community Center

Enough was enough. Not knowing was driving him absolutely crazy and whenever he saw her wander up there with an arm full of items and return empty handed he'd spend hours trying to figure out what exactly she was doing. Was she stockpiling something somewhere? If so, why? And where?

So on the crisp fall afternoon, when he watched her coming down the steps from towards the upper part of town, he locked the clinic door and headed towards her. Even the bright grin that appeared on her face as she saw him approach wasn't enough to distract him from the matter at hand. 

"What are you doing in the Community Centre?" He crossed his arms then, thinking better of it, uncrossed them and held them awkwardly at his sides in case she thought he was being aggressive. There was a fine line between the need to find out and pissing her off to the point that she wouldn't tell him. 

She looked at him, her eyes wide with fake curiosity. "What are you talking about?"

He huffed and narrowed his eyes. "Every so often you head into the old abandoned Community Centre with some things then come back out empty handed about ten minutes later. I'm just curious is all..." He stressed. 

She crossed her arms and raised a defiant eyebrow. Harvey wasn't sure whether he regretted pushing her into defensive mode or whether he slightly liked this bolder side she was showing. 

"I just, um, I mean it doesn't matter. I'm just....curious....I suppose" He drawled off and shrugged as though the matter hadn't been bothering him for the last month or so. 

She relaxed and gave a nod to Lewis who walked by, tipping his hat at the pair of them, a knowing glint in his eye. 

Rae tugged on Harvey's elbow as he glared at the mayor's smile and guided him back to the steps she'd just come from. "Come on. I'll show you."

They walked in quiet, the only sound the brown leaves crunching below their feet as Harvey nervously eyed the door to the building. He stood a few steps back as Rae nudged the door open and beckoned him inside. The vines outside crept in through the rotting wooden window frames and he noticed most of the panes of glass were now absent. The clock above the door still rested at 1220 and Harvey wondered for a fleeting moment whether it had been twenty after midnight or twenty after noon. 

As he stepped into the musty, dark room to join Rae he realised he couldn't remember ever actually setting foot in the building since he'd come to live at Pelican Town. Pierre once told him that when he'd come to the town as a child it had been a vibrant and alive place with bustling activity. But it had certainly been empty in the years Harvey had been the doctor. Stories sometimes surfaced of odd sounds emerging from the shadowy place, but since Abigail was normally the narrator most people took them with a pinch of salt. 

The muscles in his back tensed involuntarily as he looked up to see Rae standing in the middle of the room with her finger in a hush motion over her mouth. He nodded but really there wasn't much chance of him saying anything. It was exactly what he thought an abandoned building would look like. Decayed wood, large holes in the floor that looked down into a black crawl space and a sound of dripping water that came from somewhere that seemed to be right above his head. To be honest he'd been hoping for something unusual, maybe a bit more exciting. 

Just as his thoughts turned to the possibility of her bringing him here to be alone Rae moved across the room to what looked to be an old broken fish tank in the top right hand side of the room. The floorboards creaked as he joined her and he avoided the black chasm in the floor that looked like it could be an unending pit to anywhere. In front of the broken glass was a curious beige metal plate on the ground. 

As he approached it something moved suddenly in the corner of his eye. He spun around, expecting to see some sort of rodent but instead he could have sworn it was round and hovered across the wooden floor. 

"What was that?" He startled but only got a further finger to the lips from Rae in response. She stepped towards him, standing close. 

"They don't really like loud noises." She whispered, her mouth so close to Harvey's ear he could feel hot breath. He ran his tongue over his lips subconsciously. 

"What don't?" He asked gently. Rae smiled, wrapped his hand in hers and walked ahead towards a dark corridor leading off the main room. As he walked with her another red creature appeared in front of him the shadows, stopping him dead. Rae kept walking, their hands falling apart. 

"What are they? I've never seen anything like it before in my life. They look like little hovering....apples with arms and legs!" 

"They're called Junimos."

"They can talk?" 

Rae smiled and shook her head. "No. I spoke to the Wizard about them after I found a book with odd writing in here. They're like little guardians of the place I guess. Little spirits?"

"There's no such thing as spirits Rae." Harvey took his glasses off and cleaned the lenses with an untucked flap of shirt. "They must be some sort of odd vermin?" 

Rae's body shook with giggles as Harvey's cheeks suddenly felt warm. He felt a flash of frustration as she laughed at him but as soon as she noticed his discomfort she moved back closer and took his hand in hers again, a reassuring smile on her face. 

"Sometimes there are things in the universe you can't explain through science Harvey. I know that's hard for you to believe but it's true. I mean, you believe in Yoba right?"

Harvey made a face. Actually he didn't believe in the God that people said created the world. He was a firm believer in things he could see and prove; the idea of a God made far less sense to Harvey than cells, atoms and data. He could physically see and hold those things and they made sense to him. Although Harvey appreciated the community aspect of religion he couldn't admit to believing an omnipresent God existed. 

Rae sensed his hesitation. "You don't believe in Yoba?" She didn't look angry, just a little surprised. 

"No. Not really..." Harvey continued to peer off into the distance for more of the creatures. 

"You use his name when cursing often enough...." Rae trailed off as she pulled him down into the dark corridor and into a slightly better lit room at the end that housed an old rusting boiler. Under the hanging door of the device was a plaque the same as in front of the fish tank. 

"Have you ever tried to catch one of these things?" He asked vaguely, his eyes on the floor in front of the boiler. 

"Of course not!" Rae whispered loudly. "Why would I?"

"To see what they are? What they want?"

"I know what they are and what they want." 

"Oh?" He asked, his eyes trailing away from the broken pipes and scattered wood piled in the room. 

"They want me to give them things to help rebuild the community centre." She looked at him with nothing but seriousness in her eyes. 

"How does giving them things help the Community Centre be rebuilt? Can't we just all work together as a town to rebuild this place from new things?" He shuffled his moustache as he chewed at his mouth. He hadn't realised Rae was so....naive. 

"Well I don't know. But what I do know is that these plaques have items etched on them. When I bring the items and put them on the space here things just sort of....happen." She ran her hand over the plaque on the floor before heading wordlessly out of the room leaving Harvey to follow her.

He followed the echoing sound of her footsteps to another room on the other side of the building that was full of shelves laden with food and barrels that smelled of sweet ale. It was like being in a different building. While everywhere else was empty and forgotten, this room looked like the store room for a bustling kitchen. She gestured around at the room. 

"Not long ago this room was completely barren apart from a small bookshelf and some casks. I put all the items that were listed onto the plinth here and the room just sort of....transformed."

"Transformed?" He looked at her puzzled. "It happened in front of your eyes?"

"Well sort of. After I put the last thing down everything went a little hazy, lots more of Junimo appeared and kind of danced around and when the haze cleared the room was completely different." She picked up an orange from a pile on the shelf. "And the food just keeps reappearing. Whenever I take something it's always replaced next time I'm here!"

Harvey looked around at the walls. "Maybe it's some weird toxic gas of some kind being released that's making us see these things...or light tricks or something?

Rae's face crumpled into a hurt expression. Any humour she'd previously had in her eyes had disappeared and they began to glisten with tears. "You don't believe me?"

He wasn't sure how to answer. He didn't believe she could be seeing the things she claimed but didn't think she was lying either. He saw the little moving things himself but magically transforming rooms? Constantly replenishing food? Either she was imagining things or someone was messing with her. He wasn't sure what he was more concerned about. He debated internally for a few moments on how how to be both honest and tactful with her. Especially since the latter wasn't his strong point...

"It's not that I don't believe you." _Good start_ , he told himself. "It all just seems a little fantastical. Little creatures who you give random gifts to that make the building prettier and make it all fresh and new again? It's all rather odd."

She blinked away tears and nodded. "I guess so. I mean you know more about most things than I do right..." She trailed off and didn't give him a chance to answer. He stood with his mouth open and watched as she wordlessly left the room, followed a few moments later with the slamming of the front door. 

Was he ever going to stop screwing things up?


	19. Spirit's Eve

Heading into the twisting hedge maze was supposed to give her time to herself, not have her catching random villagers at dead ends in the biting wind. After meeting a stunned Maru and a slightly intoxicated looking Leah, both of whom she'd had to forge forced animated conversations with, she decided the best bet was to feign exhaustion and head back to the farm where, like for the last week or so, she could light the fire, throw the covers over her head and forget the entire day had ever happened. An owl hooted overhead but as she looked up she couldn't see anything. Maybe the cold was getting to her, she thought as she imagined herself being found as an angry ice sculpture in the middle of the maze. 

But as she looked around at the dark green shadowy walls of the surrounding plant walls she realised she had absolutely no idea how she was going to actually get out. 

Initially she'd followed the sound of the distant chatterings of the villagers conversations at the fair but now it seemed as though all she could hear was the whistling spooky music the Wizard must have piped into the night and the trickling sound of the water hitting the basin at the bottom of the fountain. She hated to admit it but she was definitely lost. 

Remembering her grandfather's rule of always turning right....or something along those lines....she swept around the next corner, hoping to see the reassuring sight of the creepy moving skeletons in a cage by Pierre's stall. 

What she found was something far more horrifying.

"Oh. Hi Harvey." He stood facing away from her at the dead end of one of the paths, his fingers nervously twisting the leaves off the hedge in front of him. At her voice he spun round and even though the moonlight wasn't hitting this part of the maze she watched as his face darkened with embarrassment. 

"Oh you found me. The truth is I got too scared so I came in here to hide. Don't tell anyone?" He looked as though he was about to slink away, embarrassed at his cowardliness but she held out her hand gently to stop him. Her breath hitched in her throat at his honesty and any attempts at indifference faded. If he could do it so could she. 

"I'm really sorry about the other day." She admitted coyly, her hand falling to her side. "I was-"

"You're sorry? Why?" He stepped out of the darkness and only then did Rae see his nerves fade and his head tilt slightly in confusion. His moustache shuffled as he considered what to say. "You really don't have anything to be sorry about. I shouldn't have implied you were being.....I just shouldn't have said anything at all. Of course I believe the things are there I'm just a bit of a stickler for things being, well, normal I guess. I'm a scientist - I need to know why things are happening. Especially if they're out of the ordinary and the stuff in the Community Centre was definitely a little out of the ordinary."

Rae nodded in time with him, her feet dancing from side to side in an attempt to stay warm in the chilling wind. She shoved her numb hands into her pockets. "I know. I suppose I'm just a little bit sensitive to people thinking I'm either lying or stupid or-"

"I absolutely don't think either of those things!" She looked up at him and, maybe for the first time in her life, realised someone meant it sincerely. The memories of her parents still speaking to her like she was a child even after she'd left home and of her manager at Joja shouting at her from across the office because she hadn't answered her call quota for the morning still made her stomach lurch with unease and she breathed out a long sigh which fogged up the air between them, hiding him behind a cloud of exasperation. 

That wasn't Harvey. He wasn't judging her or silently brushing away her opinions. Maybe the air of almost hysterical enthusiasm that she'd built up as a coping mechanism for her discomfort could be dismantled around him. She looked away, his gaze difficult to hold as she decided the honesty route was the one that would help her sleep better at night. 

"I know. And I knew it then. I just hadn't told anyone about any of the Junimo stuff so when you were cynical about it all -understandably cynical- I just was embarrassed and wished I hadn't said anything. But I shouldn't have just left. Honestly I just really didn't want to deal with you seeing me embarrassed and upset. Again."

He moved towards her, pulling her hands out of her pockets and wrapping them in his own gloved palms. The cold in her fingers seemed melted slightly and she braced herself for the apologetic let down that was sure to come. Fixing her gaze on the blue blaze burning on the lantern at the top of the hedge was better than looking into his own sympathetic green eyes. Maybe if she didn't look at him he wouldn't see the unshod tears threatening her eyes. 

"Being sincere and open isn't a bad thing. I don't want you to think you can't be honest with me Rae." He gripped her hands tightly and ran his woollen fingers over hers. She wished he wasn't wearing gloves so she could feel his skin against hers. 

She sniffed and hoped he would put it down to the cold. "I know Harvey. It just seems like whenever I let you in with something I end up getting hurt. A lot of that is down to me. I know I can be a bit fragile when I feel like I'm criticised and that's not an easy thing for most people to deal with. It's not fair to put that on you."

"It's completely fair. No one is without their weaknesses." He reassured her. "When you're with someone you're with them warts and all." He shook her hands in emphasis as she offered him a weak smile. 

_Time to put it on the line Rae and find out how things are going to be._

"Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Want to be with me?" She tried to tug her hands back; holding on to one another might be even more awkward if he was about to break the fact that he didn't really want to be with her. But instead he pulled her in even closer, allowing her to smell the cold air mixed with the lingering scent of herbal cologne he liked to wear. It gave her comfort. But only for a moment. "Because if you don't it's fine but we've sort of danced around this for a long time now and I would rather just know if-"

He closed the small gap between them and carefully covered her mouth with his. Their hands untangled and she felt his left hand behind her neck, pulling her in even further as though there was still a huge divide between he needed to remove. She opened her lips slightly against his as they desperately clung to one another and was relieved to feel him reciprocate; his tongue running over her lips gently and his glasses just touching the edge of her cheek. She lifted a cold hand to his waist to slide her hand along his hip but instead her fingers felt warm flesh from beneath his untucked shirt .He didn't flinch, his entire focus on her lips. 

She breathed against him as he pulled away slightly and she felt him moan as he came back to her mouth again, his hips pressed so tightly against hers betrayed his increasing excitement somewhat. His leg slid to the side of her own and she felt herself sinking slightly into the hedge behind her as the branches scratched at her back. The kiss was getting more intense than she'd even imagined it to be but since pulling back herself was no longer an option she would have to wait until Harvey had his fill of her. 

As though he realised things were getting unexpectedly heated he released her, stepping back and panted slightly. As Rae smiled she felt the cold air hit the burn from his moustache on her upper lip; a very pleasant reminder of the experience she'd hopefully have for a few minutes yet. 

Harvey looked shocked at himself and she wasn't sure whether it had been the kiss itself or just how far it had nearly gone just a few hundred yards from the entire village. 

"Wow. I wasn't expecting that. Quite that..... So you do then?" She breathed, half laughing at her own ability to talk or think clearly. 

He took a few moments to collect himself and pushed his glasses further up his nose uncomfortably. "Rae that was....so so good. But I've not done a lot of this before. Really caring about someone." He put his hand on his forehead and turned away from her slightly, prompting yet another feeling of unease in her stomach that he was about to declare it all a ridiculous mistake. But instead he shook his head and looked at her intensely. "I've spent a lot of my life being told people aren't interested or actually just being ignored. Sometimes it's a bit easier to just build a wall and pretend the feelings aren't there so they'll eventually just disappear. And frankly Rae you're.....and I'm just.... I think Alex would describe this as me 'punching above my weight'? I don't really feel like I'm enough for you."

She laughed giddily with overwhelming relief and bliss as a sudden hard wind pulled her thick black hair around her face. "You're plenty Harvey. You're exactly what I want. But we can't do this if you go into it thinking you're not good enough. And I really would like to do this. I mean if you would?"

_This is his chance Rae. To say it's a mistake._

"I'll work on it."

A goofy smile appeared on both their faces as months of uncertainty and clumsy flirting finally reached a crescendo. By the time she finally found the words to speak her cheeks ached from smiling. 

"Good. Let's both work on it all together? It's going to take a bit of time to really discover each other. Let's just take it as it comes?"

"That sounds like a very good idea. Now we should probably go before someone catches us and gossip starts." He raised his eyebrows and began to guide her out of the maze's dead end they'd found themselves in. 

"Yeah sure. But Harvey? You need to tell me when you feel uncomfortable or something's bothering you. No more just running away from it OK? And I'll do the same?"

"That will definitely be new for me. But I'll try."

He pointed to a clearing in the maze and as they walked towards it the sound of the villagers conversations outside in the town square suddenly got louder. For a moment she wondered how the open topped maze could possibly have been so quiet just a few moments before but as she turned and locked her green eyes into Harvey's anxious gaze none of it really seem to matter any more. 

No one even seemed to notice them emerging from the maze as they focused on their own conversations. The only person that even looked up was Jas who just smiled and turned around for another handful of brightly coloured candy from a bowl. 

Reality hit harder than she'd expected as Rae realised the privacy they'd just been offered had been the catalyst for their candor. She looked to Harvey and they exchanged an awkward smile. 

"Want to walk me back to the farm?" She asked. His expression turned steely and as he looked at her she realised just what she'd implied. 

"I, um..."

"Just a walk Harvey." She held up her hands in mock defence. "I won't try any funny business, honest."

He rolled his eyes. "Of course I will. Come on." 

Her hand itched to put itself in his but she knew how difficult that would be for him. It was going to take him a while to get used to the fact that everyone in the village knew what was going on between the two of them. Patience would be worth it in this case, she reassured herself. But as she was consoling herself he lifted her arm and clasped it into his, weaving themselves together. She smiled up at him. 

"I mean maybe another kiss when we get there? That first one was pretty good..." She joked. She looked ahead and but could see the amiable tug of his lips out of the corner of her eye. 

"Just let's walk home." He laughed. 

And, for the first time since she'd arrived in Pelican Town, it really did feel like she was going home.


	20. Cooking

He should have said no. He really really really should have said no. 

But when Rae had asked if she could come over for dinner while Robin made the finishing touches to the farmhouses new kitchen, he'd nodded, spluttered a yes and then panicked later about what the hell he was going to make for her. 

Soothing music ebbed from the old fashioned radio by his bed but did nothing to calm his nerves as he peered into the fridge and did a brief inventory of its contents. 

A half full bag of coffee grounds, three microwave meals and a jar of pickles wasn't going to make much of a meal. Curing himself inwardly for being so damned ill prepared, he slammed the door in frustration and grabbed his coat from the hook by the door. 

As he raced down the stairs, two at a time, he searched his memory for Rae mentioning her favourite foods. Or, frankly, any foods she actually liked. But he was coming up with nothing. Had they even really discussed food? He had vague memories of seeing her eat at the Saloon but the anxiety that had previously come with even seeing her face seemed to have blocked out any memories of what she's been having. 

_Right, so what did you actually cook last? Maybe go with something you know you can manage?_

Nothing. 

He swung from the door to the clinic right into Pierre's and realised he'd gone from zero options to far too many. Standing in front of a shelf of brightly coloured packets, jars and cartons then slyly looking to the fresh produce on his left, he wasn't even sure where to start with this bounty of options. 

Pierre looked at him over the counter where he was silently piling some coins. "You OK there Harvey?"

"Do you happen to know what Rae's favourite food is?" Any subtlety about his intentions had gone out the window when he realised he only had two hours to find and create a meal for her. The first meal they'd share.

_The first of many?_

Pierre grinned and shuffled the bags of gold into a drawer behind the counter and turned the old copper key. "I do actually. But you're not going to find it here I'm afraid."

Harvey stuffed back the packets of pasta he'd grabbed in a panic and headed towards the counter. 

"Why?"

Pierre chuckled and looked at Harvey over his glasses. "It's cheese cauliflower. And while I've got some cheese in the chiller cabinet there you're fresh out of luck on the cauliflower. It's spring veg - can't imagine you'll find any in town on the second day of winter I'm afraid." He offered Harvey a sympathetic look but shrugged his shoulders and pointed to the coolers. "The cheeses are in the one by the door; if you wanted to grab some in case?"

Harvey nodded crestfallen, took a selection of cheese from the cabinet and rummaged in his coat pocket for some errant coins he guessed were in there. "Uh, I seem to be a little short... Maybe I'll just take this one-" He examined the various options to see which one was best left abandoned. 

"Don't worry about it Harvey. I'll get it another time..." Pierre assured him. Harvey pushed forward all the coin he'd found in his pockets and headed to the door. 

"I'll get it for you tomorrow!" 

"Don't worry!" Pierre shouted back after him. 

No wonder he wasn't turning a profit, thought Harvey cynically. But then he too was known for helping out the villagers when funds were tight. Maybe this was karma giving him a thumbs up for once?

He stood outside the store and looked around the quiet town. Where was he going to get cauliflower in winter? Across the river the hulking white building dominated the corner of the town above the museum. A chill wind of snowflakes whipped at his face as though his better conscious was giving him a slap. 

Desperate times... he reminded himself and pushed through the snow flurries to the Joja Mart. 

The upbeat tinkling of the doors mechanical bell as the doors slid apart did nothing to assuage the guilt in the pit of Harvey's stomach. He looked around and caught the eye of Morris whose shark tooth grin made him shudder as it appeared from behind a stack of packing crates by the door. 

The tall, raven haired man emerged from behind the boxes and swept his arm around dramatically before grinning again at Harvey. "Anything you're looking for Doctor we're sure to have. Did you have something specific in mind?" He pointed at the bundles of cheese in Harvey's hand and the edges of his mouth drew further upwards. 

"I, um. I know it's out of season but do you have any cauliflower?" Harvey whispered, worried he'd be heard by other shoppers. Though the place seemed empty he knew Pam and Jodi both shopped here. Pam and Rae weren't close but seeing Harvey there would be just the sort of thing that Jodi might innocently slip into conversation the next time she saw her friend. 

Morris threw his head back, thrust his hand dramatically over his chest and whooped a show laugh, exposing a mouth full of cavities filled with silver, making his oddly automaton nature even more prominent. 

"Of course we do. They're frozen obviously but that's easily remedied." He gestured to the wall of identical freezers at the back of the shop. "Do help yourself. When you've found everything you need just come right back to Ida here. She'll be happy to help." Morris spun back around and busied himself amongst the crates and boxes. 

Harvey looked across at Ida who stood behind the cash register with a grim expression on her ashen face. She glanced at Harvey with dull grey eyes and stayed motionless, only moving her eyes to focus what Harvey could only interpret as a death stare right into Morris now turned back. He'd never spoken to her before, she must live in the city and travel in to work, but he suddenly imagined her as a young woman, vibrant and full of life. Before Joja had its way with her. 

Would that have been Rae's fate if she hadn't moved to Pelican Town to take over the farm? Would her eyes become as lifeless as Ida's; her spirit visibly broken and muted? 

He shook off the worry. One frozen head of cauliflower wasn't going to change the world. She didn't even have to know where the vegetable had come from, he reassured himself as he turned the corner towards seemingly unending stark and clinical looking white shelves. 

"What are you doing here Doc?" Shane looked at Harvey from under his blue hat with a mixed expression of confusion and unease. 

"I needed something. For a meal for Rae..."

"No!" Shane growled, the sound echoing through the large room and drowning out the clunky electronic music that was being piped out of speakers in the ceiling. Harvey stepped back defensively as Shane moved at him. "Rae wouldn't want anything from here. I know that." 

He looked Harvey up and down with narrowed eyes and the doctor stared down at his feet uncomfortably. "Well no, I know that Shane. But I need it for dinner. It's cauliflower - out of season and you can't get it anywhere - what would you have me do?"

"Make her something else." He turned, rearranged the cap on his head and started noisily stacking cans, from a box marked Cow Soup, on an already overflowing shelf. "She wouldn't want anything from here." He muttered bitterly. 

The last remark almost sounded dejected instead of angry and just as Harvey went to move in and reassure Shane the man reeled around again gesturing at the promotional posters that lined the walls. "This white box is everything Rae came here to escape. Do you get that? She wouldn't want anything that came from this place with its crappy corporate agenda I can guarantee that. But if you think you know her better than I do then go ahead. You're much smarter than me Doc..." Shane lifted the box of canned beef soup and moved towards the store cupboard without waiting for a response.

Harvey smoothed his hand over his moustache and rested it on his chin, juggling the cheese in his free hand. Shane was right of course. He couldn't buy anything from Joja to give to Rae. Either she'd be hurt that he'd go against her beliefs or she'd be furious when she, inevitably, found out that's where he'd got it from. He gave himself a silent nod of confirmation and practically ran to the door, ignoring Morris' offers of coupons for his next visit. 

He was just going to come up with the goods some other way...

\-------------------

The food was bubbling on the newly cleaned stove when the knock at the front door rumbled through the clinic. He looked over the makeshift dining table with its mismatched glasses, knives and forks before loping down to meet Rae. 

When he opened the door and saw her standing there, the newly falling snow kissing her dark hair and her cheeks pink from the bitter gale, he froze. His mouth slacked open and despite the chilling air he felt sweat building on the small of his back. She smiled politely for a moment but once she realised he wasn't looking to do anything beyond stare at her she raised her eyebrows. 

"It's a bit cold out here now the snow has started Harvey?" She pleaded with him and watched as the stunned expression left his face. He stood back and gestured for her to come in. Snow drifted off her olive coloured coat and small puddles formed onto the reception area of the clinic. The tiny white snowflakes melted into her hair and skin making her look almost dewy instead of windswept. 

She shrugged off her jacket which he wrapped into his arms as she continued up the stairs to the sound of the gentle jazz drifting from the radio. He turned to see her looking round eagerly and realised she'd never been in his apartment before. 

He suddenly felt nervous and apologetic. "Sorry it's not very roomy. Or tidy...." 

She moved towards the display of model planes as Harvey searched for somewhere clean to lay her jacket. He dropped it onto the sofa, rushed to her and pointed to one on the upper shelf. 

"Its a B-36J Peacemaker!" His expression lit up as watched her and he reached forward and lifted it from the shelf to show her in more detail. He smoothed his hand over the large green bomb that was attached to the base as Rae offered him a slightly indulgent look. He carefully placed it back on the shelf and lifted the blue plane next to it. "This is a RQ-4A Global Hawk. Its a surveillance aircraft, unmanned." He gazed at her, expecting questions, but she gave him a soft smile. 

"They're really pretty?" As she reached forward, Harvey flinched back slightly. "Oh are they expensive?"

Harvey's cheeks flushed a deep red. "Sorry Rae," he mumbled. "I'm really not used to anyone being up here." He popped it back up on the shelf as a small veil of dust bounced from the wood. 

Rae reached out her hand to touch Harvey's, rubbing her thumb gently over his palm. He wasn't sure if it was intended to be reassuring but his shoulders slouched and the tension that had been slowly building since he'd opened the door seemed to melt away. 

She kept hold of his hand as she moved across to the kitchen; Harvey more than happy to keep his grip. He entertained a panicked thought that if he let go she might up and leave.

"Uh, are you sure it's OK to have that stove burning inside?" She looked nervously at the tiny camping stove sat upon a makeshift bar on the sink. 

"Yeah I really didn't have a need for a stove until today. So I spoke to Linus about this. He said it would be OK if I put it right next to the window and kept it wide open. Let me know if you get cold. Or, uh, feel dizzy..."

Rae laughed and released his hand to dip a spoon into the bubbling green flecked liquid on the little stove. 

"It smells incredible. What is it?"

Not cheese cauliflower, he reminded himself silently. 

"Its artichoke cheddar soup? And I got some freshly baked bread from Robin. I know you like her bread." He paused and looked away at the simple pan of soup. "Is that OK?"

She lifted the spoon to her lips and tasted. Harvey watched her lips carefully run over the spoon and took a large gulp of breath, looking away uncomfortably. Rae smiled and her eyes rolled back in bliss. 

"It's so good! Pierre's canned soup doesn't normally taste as good as this!"

"Uh, I made it..." She cocked an eyebrow at him and nudged his arm. 

"Really? She placed the spoon back by the stove and moved towards him. "You really didn't have to go to all that trouble..."

If only you knew...

"It was no trouble." He lied. "I know it's not your favourite but...."

"Harvey," she began, tentatively wrapping her arms around his waist and recoiling slightly when his body stiffened, her smile vanishing. "Sorry..."

"No." He cursed himself internally at her withdrawal. "You don't have to stop. I just...I'm sorry. I just want this to all be easy and comfortable and I'm not very good at easy or comfortable. And last time we got a little carried away. I'll work on it..."

"Harvey you made me dinner. Do you know the last time someone actually cooked for me?" Her green eyes glistened at his and he shook his head. "I was nine... My parents were very much of the opinion that once you could look after yourself you were set and should just get on with it. I'm not saying I want to be coddled but this?" She nodded to the soup. "This is one of the best gifts I've been given in a really long time."

"You've never had a boyfriend cook for you?"

"Let's just say that most of my previous relationships have been with guys who think pizza and beer is the height of cuisine..." Harvey's stomach sank as he thought back to Shane's comment that he knew her better. Did he? Was Shane a better fit for Rae?

"Oh. OK." He took a wooden ladle to the soup and grabbed the basket of bread from on top of the microwave. "So is that...is that the sort of man you like?" He tried desperately to seem relaxed and casual but the mechanical way that he placed the bread on the folding table betrayed his nerves. 

"No. Not now Harvey." She opened the doors of the cupboards under the sink and appeared with a couple of mismatched and chipped bowls. She offered them to Harvey who ran his calloused fingers over the rough edges of the chips. A reassuring hand on his arm made his muscles tighten further as he looked up at her through slightly steamed glasses. "I think my days of being impressed by pizza and beer types are probably over."

"Is hastily made soup and bread any better?"

Her expression hardened. "Yes. It is." She assured him. "I can see that cooking isn't something you do very often Harvey. So the fact that you've gone and got all these things to make me dinner instead of just taking me to the Saloon or whatever? Yes. This is far, far better..."

"I just want you to be happy Rae." He said quietly. She lifted her hand up to his cheek and touched her lips gently against his. It probably wouldn't even have been classed it as a kiss. It was a thank you. But his lips still ghosted with her taste after she'd gone back to take the soup from the stove. 

"Are you ready to start?" She asked, ladling soup into the green bowls.

Definitely ready to start, he thought.


	21. Favourite Season

Slipping back to the farm after the Festival of Ice, without being ogled at by the other villagers, was proving trickier than Rae might have liked. 

Virtually everyone from Pelican Town had come by to commiserate with Rae about losing the fishing competition and, while Harvey remained with her, no one had taken the obviously too subtle hint that the two were looking to be alone. Only after Rae insisted to Elliott that he had really truly deserved to win and that she'd only joined in due to some gentle ribbing from Lewis did the villagers finally dissipate for good, leaving Rae and Harvey standing by the snow covered wooden fence leading onto the very southern edge of the farm. 

The snow flurries had stopped towards the end of the competition but a new, thick blanket of white lay on the ground and tiny peaks rested on the plants and flowers. They shared a slight giggle as every time they took a surreptitious step further away from the event, someone else would inevitably head towards them with either a minor medical question or some other small talk. 

Eventually Harvey tired of it and tugged her arm. "Come on."

"What if someone sees us heading off together?"

Harvey gave the group a final over the shoulder glance and huffed a thick cloud of hot air as he stomped a boot into the thick snow by the fence. "I don't care at this point."

Rae sniggered under her breath, grabbed his arm with her yellow mittened hands and the pair walked off towards the farm. Rae might have snuck a quick look behind her but didn't see the sly look Caroline gave them before turning and agreeing earnestly with Pierre that really, yes, there should be food at the event. 

The only problem with coming into the farm from the southern gate was that it was the longest possible walk between there and the house that was offering the faint warm promise of a hot fire and warm drinks. Rae peered through the trees and could see the now white tip of the farmhouse appear beyond their snow capped branches. If she had to trudge through the ice and snow to get home she was grateful for the steady hand that she grasped. 

"I'm pretty sure there's hot cocoa in the house you know?" She pulled Harvey in closer, relishing the solitude and leaning into the rumble of the chuckle in his chest. 

"There will be trouble if there's none now."

"It's not like I planned this ahead or anything you know." Rae could feel Harvey shiver a little even under the heavy coat he was wearing; she wasn't quite sure if it was the cold or nerves making his arm shudder. "Are you sure you want to come back? I can happily walk you back to the--"

"I definitely want to come back." He assured her, the faint smell of coffee lingering on his breath. 

Soon the slow expedition up the farm was complete and, after Rae quickly ran to close the barn and coop doors for the evening, she joined Harvey on the porch and both succumbed to the warm invitation of the farmhouse. 

Flicking on a floor lamp Harvey's eyes widened as he scoped the new room. Rae had really gone all out with the work she'd commissioned from Robin. There was a whole area dedicated to the farmhouse kitchen now, with a ton more storage space and a much bigger fridge and stove. Harvey looked around the attached room and shrugged off his coat and scarf, giving them to Rae and leaving himself in a much cooler thin grey shirt and brown pants. 

Basil stood and stretched lazily as the lights brightened the room and sat on the sofa, panting at the pair. The exertion was clearly too much for him as he melted back into a heap of brown hair and snuffles on the cushions a moment later.

"Sleeping on the sofa now?" He joked as Rae hung his coat on the wall by the door. Her stare lingered on his backside a little too long as he started to tug off his wet boots. 

She kicked off her boots and socks and slung her own coat and scarf on the wall. She had definitely hoped Harvey would join her back at the house but as she looked down at her simple grey knitted sweater dress and black tights she'd wished she'd made more of an effort to dress up. 

"Not quite." She pointed to a corridor off to the side. "Through there is where you used to come in. The bedroom is in there now..." She purposefully avoided his stare and looked away as her cheeks pinked at the mentioned of the bedroom. 

_Come on now Rae you're not a teenager. Get a grip._

Harvey cleared his throat. "It's really lovely. And you can still smell the fresh wood..." He raised his nose into the air and as Rae nodded emphatically her loose dark hair bounced around her face. 

"I love that smell! I never want it to go away." She pulled the heavy curtains against the dark night outside where the snow was starting to come down again. They'd avoided it during their walk which she'd normally be pleased about. But this evening she thought it might have been a little romantic to stroll back in the gently falling snow. "Snow's started again." She looked back to Harvey who was now sitting on the sofa, running his hands over Basil's head. "Let's hope it doesn't get too bad huh?"

Harvey stood quickly causing Basil to jump up and clatter his gangly legs onto the rug. "Do you want me to-"

"No!" She laughed and went to the kitchen. "Don't be silly. It's not falling that hard. Plus, would it be the end of the world if we got snowed in?" 

Harvey's silence was noted as she opened the fridge door, pulled out a large glass pitcher of heavy milk and held it up. "Fresh from this morning. Still want that hot cocoa? It's no artichoke soup but might be nice after that walk."

Harvey sat back down and stretched out on the sofa. As she watched him reach out his limbs Rae caught a glimpse of how it might look if Harvey and she shared the farmhouse. Lazy Sunday mornings in bed and evenings sitting reading in front of the fire sparked in her mind and she realised she'd never wanted anything more than to be huddled up with him, skin touching as they sat on the porch and listened to the sound of the animals on a hot summer day. Right now his expression was as relaxed as she'd ever known it and she stood rigid, poised with the pitcher of milk in her hand. It was gently tipping over when Harvey turned to her.

"You're about to have some spilled milk." He looked over his glasses slightly as her brain engaged away from the fantasy and she pulled it up from its near spillage. She offered a nervous smile and turned away, trying to avoid him seeing her burning cheeks. They weren't even officially seeing each other yet and she was imagining him living there? He'd run a country mile if he realised what direction her mind was going in, she thought. 

"Do you need any help?" He offered, sitting up further on the sofa. 

"No no," Rae tipped some milk into a pan and set it on the stove, flicking on the gas. "It's good. I'll just melt some chocolate into the milk, add some vanilla and we'll be done."

"No canned cocoa for you huh?"

"It tastes much better I promise." She offered him a lazy wink as he stretched toes under his patched and old looking socks, looking round at the paintings she'd hung on the walls. Most of them were recognisable as Leah's but Rae had been a bit of an amateur photographer before ending up in Pelican Town and about a half dozen of the pictures were her own. From where she stood Harvey seemed to have rested his eyes on a black and white print of a horse drinking from a lake that she'd taken the year before. She willed him to ask where it had come from so she could tell the tale of camping in the mountains but instead he turned around and locked eyes with her, his arm lazing over the back of the sofa. 

She sighed deeply and blissfully. Harvey had been so tightly wound when they first met. He'd even admitted to being scared of her. Watching him now radiating such a calm air, and in her home, made her silently giddy. She realised she never wanted him to leave. As she stirred the milk he asked if he might put some music on. She nodded and he flicked the switch on the radio by the TV. 

"What do you like?" He asked, spinning the dials on the front. 

"Jazz?" Harvey tuned the radio to his favourite station and soon the sound of relaxing piano filled the air. Rae broke the chocolate pieces into the pan and kept it moving, Harvey's slightly bobbing head that moved to the melody catching the corner of her eye.

As the heated cocoa spun into a satisfying creamy bronze colour she tipped it into a pair of mugs and offered one to him as they came together on the soft pillows of the sofa. Harvey dipped his mouth into the cup, taking a long drink and reappearing with a light froth coating on his moustache. Rae stifled a giggle behind her cup. 

"What is it?" He looked horrified as Rae rested her mug on the coffee table and leaned across. She swept her thumb over the milk on his upper lip and licked it off instinctively. 

She hadn't meant for it to be seductive but it was enough for Harvey to thrust his own mug on the table by hers, lean in towards her and cup her cheek in his hand. He roughly pressed his lips against hers; kissing her with an intensity she furiously returned. The kiss was hungry and needy and before she could make sense of how it had even happened she was lying back, Harvey above her, sweeping his tongue over hers with the mixture of sugar and milk and his own taste combining to create an intoxicating combination that fogged her mind and made her moan into his mouth. 

The music had died in her ears and all she could make out was the thump of blood in her head and the sound of their lips meeting noisily over and over. She wasn't sure where this raw demand to close any space between them was coming from but memories of the evening in the maze suddenly came flooding back as she gripped her arms around his back and locked her legs around his own, as though any space between them might push him away. He braced himself on a strength she didn't realise he had as she ran her nails over his thinly shirted back. 

His tongue dipped into her mouth again and she flicked her own around it, finally and gently grasping his lower lip in her teeth. He lifted his head from above hers, his body still sprawled on top of her own and he stared down into her lust heavy green eyes. She wanted it to go further, desperately did. But it was still so soon and there was a delicate balance to be maintained. She was going to have to fight her brain on this one if she wanted to hold back. 

Her breathing was ragged as he went to move away but she gripped him back and kept him on her as her chest rose and fell in time with his. The way he got when they kissed was nothing like she ever saw from him normally. His shy and reserved nature seemed to take a back seat to the carnal urgency to have her when they were alone. She burned at the sight of his eyes filling with hunger for her, unable to deny himself it. When she'd imagined them kissing before (and she had, many many times) she'd always assumed the kiss would be as tentative as everything that had come before it between them. But even though their social interactions could still remain slightly uncomfortable and nervous, the greed for one another other when they were tangled up certainly wasn't. 

He swallowed and looked over at the coffee table with a single raised eyebrow as his glasses slid further down his nose. "What did you put in that cocoa?" 

Rae adjusted herself under him slightly keeping her hand firmly placed against his hip and her leg wrapped around his. She felt her dress slightly hitched up under her backside. "Must have been all that sugar."

"Must have been..." he sighed as he lowered himself onto her for another round.


	22. Exploring the Mines

"Take the pills." Harvey thrust a vial of white tablets towards the old man in the wheelchair who looked down at them as though he's been offered poison. 

"They make me cranky." 

Harvey rolled his eyes behind his smudged glasses and crossed his arms as he debated where the professional line lay. "I don't think it's the pills that make you cranky George." Evelyn took the bottle with frail, crooked hands and nodded as she stuffed them into her purse. 

"Don't worry Doctor Harvey. I'll make sure he takes them." She cocked her head around at her husband's scowling features. "Won't you?"

He grunted and she mouthed 'he will'. As she pushed her husband towards the door and refused the offer of help back to the house Harvey stood and watched as the wheelchair made distant trails on the thinning snow until he could no longer see the pair. It had been mild for a few days and he'd heard a few villagers wondering whether the bad weather was gone for the season and it might start to brighten up. Harvey had even popped for a walk a few hours before without a jacket, sitting on the bench by the river, eating his sad cheese sandwich. 

But now the evening was closing in and the sky was mottled with pink and yellow. This was the time of day he hated most; the one where he'd have to lock up the door and go sit alone for a few hours before he went to bed. And even then he knew he'd lie awake for hours, his mind cycling through a thousand unnecessary scenarios before he eventually drifted off into an uncomfortable and unsatisfying sleep. He didn't enjoy it but the thought of a new life with Rae perked his lips slightly as he rummaged for the keys in his pants pocket. 

If he'd closed the door a moment earlier he wouldn't have seen the hunched, dark figure limping round the corner. Medical instinct pushed him out the door to rush to the casualty and his mouth hung open as recognition dawned. 

"Rae?" He grabbed her body and she winced, pushing him away slightly. "What's happened?" His voice was panicked as he ushered her reluctantly into the clinic. 

"I'm fine..." she trailed off, holding a grimy hand on to her waist. 

"You're not fine!" He practically shouted and he lifted her onto a sitting position on the bed once they reached the back room of the clinic. "Were you attacked?" The possibility seemed so remote but he couldn't think what would have caused the injuries. He rushed to a tray of equipment at the back of the room. 

"Well..." she muttered. Harvey looked at her with confusion as he gathered everything he'd need together. His expression became grave as he realised what had happened. 

"You were in the mines." It wasn't a question and Rae didn't respond. 

"Nothing's broken." She held out her arm and braced her side with her other hand. 

"I'll be the judge of that." He said curtly, examining a widening stain of blood on the bottom of her sweater at her hip. "Take your top off."

"Wow Harvey, so forward." She tried to laugh but it quickly became a coughing fit and she crumpled in pain. Harvey looked at her, lost. If anyone else had stepped through the door he'd have given them a thorough and detached examination but with Rae he just wanted to whisk the problems away and cling onto her for dear life until she felt better. Everything he'd learned in twelve years of practising medicine suddenly seemed to evaporate from his head as his lover sat hunched on the bed. 

"No jokes Rae. Not now." His face was pulled into an expression of tight fury and Rae evidently saw this as she silently lifted her top over her head to let him examine her leaving herself in her rose pink bra. She'd later tell him she was surprised he didn't so much as glance at her breasts but instead looked closely at the wound. It looked superficial but it needed pressure. He placed a compress against it and looked up at her over his glasses as he pulled on a pair of gloves. "Did you hit your head?" As he looked into her eyes he watched her pupils for signs of concussion. 

"No. There are a couple of little scratches on my arm and my legs will be bruised up but I've had worse scything wheat. Other than that just this thing on my side and that's probably just a graze."

"It's not." He said impatiently through gritted teeth. "It's a huge gash and is going to need stitches. Is that the only place it got you?" 

He wondered for a moment about what sort of creature had attacked her. It likely wasn't a slime because they tended to leave a thick residue over the wound. Bats and bugs normally attacked the face and head. And golums didn't respond unless someone attacked them which she wasn't likely to do. 

He broke the twist cap off the bottle of saline and rummaged for some gauze in the box. "How far down did you go?" She looked at him, her face smeared with dust and grime and her hair hanging in tangled knots. He knew there were creatures on all levels but how dangerous they got advanced as the depth did.

"Further down than I've ever been before." She whispered. He didn't have a response. Instead he set his jaw and squeezed the saline over the wound. She jerked at the pain. 

"Sorry," he muttered. As the fluid cleaned the debris and blood from around the wound a relatively small circle surrounded by what looked like black scorch marks could be seen. He leaned in closer and touched a gloved finger against them. "Rae, what got you?"

Her expression darkened and her dangling feet swung around awkwardly. "I don't know for sure. It was a black creature with white glowing eyes. It just lunged at me from the shadows. I slammed my dagger into him but I dropped my damn backpack with all the ore and just crawled to the ladder while it was stunned."

"Good Yoba Rae..." He watched as tears pooled in her eyes as he pressed the gauze hard against her hip. The room was silent but for the whirr of the heater in the waiting room and Harvey felt the blood vanish from his head as he imagined Rae's form lying in a heap outside the mines. "You need to be more careful out there. I have nightmares about your limp body being wheeled into the emergency room."

He hadn't intended to make her feel any guiltier than she already clearly felt but she lifted her free hand to his arm and gave it a squeeze. "I'm sorry Harvey. I just have to do something to keep the farm going in winter. You know all the crops die off in this weather..."

"Learn to fish..." he hissed. 

He lifted the gauze off and confirmed the blood had stopped flowing. The suture kit was on the metal tray he'd brought over but he stepped away to the cupboard for a vial of anaesthetic. He twisted it onto the syringe and Rae withdrew. 

"Harvey I can't really...I mean I'm not exactly swimming in gold at the moment. Could you maybe stitch it up without that?"

"No," he answered, leaning in and sticking her with the needle. "Don't worry about the cost." His tone was final; this was an argument for another time and he shook his head slightly as he tossed the needle onto the second tray. "Give it a moment to kick in." 

His mind was in turmoil. How could he be so utterly furious with someone at the same time that he wanted to grip onto her and never let her out of his sight again? What was she thinking going into the mines with all their danger? He'd never understand it. Harvey knew he was a damned coward but this was beyond normal. As he noticed her green eyes had dark rings beneath them some of the anger melted and he rested his hand on her thigh. A few weeks ago he wouldn't have had the courage to even do that, especially as she sat half naked in front of him, but now, as he tried to remove her pain, he stroked her gently and she offered him a weak smile. 

"I'm sorry. I know it's dangerous and you don't like it. Frankly I'm not too fond of it myself but needs must."

"No," he said gently. "I know what it's like when money feels tight but don't do this. We'll figure something out." That made the unshod tears spill from her eyes and down her cheeks as she hiccuped a sob. 

"And now I don't even have the damn ore because I had to leave it there." She cried. He leaned in and embraced her, her small body shaking with whimpers. "I'm such an idiot."

"You are," he smiled as he pulled away from her and looked deep into her eyes. "But don't worry. So am I. But luckily your boyfriend is an idiot with a medical degree."

She straightened her body. "My boyfriend?" She sniffed loudly. "Maybe today isn't turning out to be the worst one for a long time after all." 

He pulled open a sterile packed of needles and medical thread and used the scissors from the tray to thread the needle. "If you were at a city hospital they'd have a packet of dissolvable stitches and this would be a lot easier. "He indicated for her to hold still. "Unfortunately you've just got a small town doctor who doesn't do an awful lot of this. Do you feel this?" He asked, pressing the skin around the wound. 

She shook her head and sat calmly as the needle pierced her skin. He swallowed as he fleetingly wished he were this close to her under better circumstances. They sat in silence as he carefully closed the wound and taped a fresh square of gauze over the site. 

The scissors crashed into the metal tray as Harvey threw them in. He ran his hands over the cuts on her arms but she'd been right; they were nothing to worry about. He broke open another saline and soaked a pad with it, cleaning the scratches with care. 

The last time he'd had to stitch anyone up was in his ER rotation nearly a decade ago. The last years in Pelican Town were mainly spent nursing runny noses and dealing with the occasional sprained ankle. People knew not to go near the mines. The old fool Marlon was the only one who dared go in there any more; until now it seemed. Instinct wanted him to demand that she never set foot in there again, that agree and never even give any thought to how much gold Clint would pay for the ore and gems she found in there. But he knew he couldn't do that. He didn't own her and wasn't in charge of her. His head twinged with pain as he tried to figure out what to tell her. 

The silence they sat in was oddly comfortable and when he'd given her a complete look over and determined nothing else needed attention he placed his arms on either side of her on the bed and leaned in, leaving mere inches between their faces. 

"Rae... you... you mean the world to me." His brow furrowed as he struggled to come up with the words to describe how he felt. "I know I can't tell you not to do anything. Even asking you not to do something isn't fair. But the mines are dangerous and this won't be the last time you get hurt in there I can guarantee it. I'll always be here to stitch you back up..." His voice lowered. "...until stitches won't cut it anymore."

He didn't dare look at her, instead resting his forehead against her own as she wrapped her arms around him. They stayed like that for a while, breathing in each others essence before he lifted his head up and pressed his lips against her cheek. He kept his head against hers and whispered, "Stay here tonight." She turned to look at him, her expression desperate and confused before shaking her head. 

"I'm OK Harvey. I need to get back to the farm and have a shower." He could tell it wasn't what her heart was telling her but she'd made it clear she wanted to wait and for the time to be right. 

"I'll sleep on the sofa Rae. I just don't want you to be by yourself. What if you do have a concussion?"

He stood back and she eased herself off the bed with a scowl. She smiled at him sadly. "I'll be OK. I promise." She headed towards the door, leaving him by the bed and as he out a sigh that felt as though it had been hours in the making. Before she let the door swing behind her she offered him an impish grin over her shoulder.

"Maybe I'll come by and see my boyfriend tomorrow for a follow up though."

He heard strained giggling before the door closed sharply behind her.

"Couldn't have found yourself a nice easy one Doc." Harvey muttered to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know very little about first aid/what a doctor would actually do in these circumstances etc. Apologies for any inaccuracies!


	23. Out of Energy

The snow crunched under his beaten old brown boots as Harvey gripped onto the fence leading to the farm. No fresh snow had fallen in days but the temperature stayed under freezing so the compacted snow was fast turning into an ice rink. The soles of his boots had mediocre grips but even they were struggling to keep him upright as the sun dipped below the horizon and the winds grew even more biting. 

Worries about pulling a muscle if he slid or breaking an ankle if he slipped plagued his thoughts but still onward he moved. Before he'd left the clinic, he'd gone through a dozen potential injury scenarios and still decided that visiting Rae was worth any risk. The stitches from the creature's attack in the mines were due to come out tomorrow so he wanted to give it a once over before she came to get them removed at the clinic.

_Careful now. One foot in front of the other. Tiny baby steps Harvey..._

When he caught sight of the tall farm house with its temporary snowy hat he breathed a deep sigh of relief and dragged himself along faster, his gloves now sodden with ice crystals melting all over them. The sun was a mere glowing line on the horizon now and its absence had resulted in another drastic drop in temperature. Not for the first time Harvey was glad his upper lip was warm at least. Hopefully Rae had the fire burning and a cup of coffee ready for him because he wasn't sure he could manage without--

What was the thing on the porch? He edged closer and when he realised what was making the shape he abandoned all attempts at baby steps and began to jog full pelt across the path. 

"Rae!" He shouted desperately. It seemed like all she was doing these days was scaring the life out of him, and as he approached the figure he realised she wasn't responding to his calls at all. "Rae!" He called again, louder; desperation echoing through the valley. The chickens chattered in response, safely tucked in their coop, but still Rae sat motionless. 

He whipped off his wet glove and cupped her hand. Even though he wasn't warm himself he could tell she was ice cold. As he leaned in closer he felt warm breath on his cheek and watched as her chest rise and fell regularly. Should he take her to the clinic or just inside? He didn't have anything with him if she needed medical help but, as though she could sense his concern, her eyes fluttered open and she gazed up at him, calmly smiling. 

"Hey, Doc. I must have fallen asleep..." Her voice was breathy and she squinted as she looked round at the farm. "It was much sunnier when I sat down."

By the time Harvey formulated an actual sentence he'd already picked Rae up and the breathlessness caused by lifting her weight wouldn't allow him to say anything. Instead he huffed at her angrily, cursed her out loudly in the silence of his own head and shoved the front door open with his backside. A dim lamp was on in the kitchen that cast shadows over the room and he looked around, trying to remember where Rae told him her bedroom was. He caught sight of the corridor to his right and shuffled his feet down it, hugging Rae into him before he carefully placed her on the bed. As he caught his breath he realised any other time he would venture to her bedroom he'd be looking around like a trapped animal but, just like seeing her half naked the other day in his clinic, he realised there were bigger fish to fry. 

The bedroom was dark other than a slim patch of light coming in from the lamp in the living room. He looked around but could only see a candle on her bedside table. Next to it were matches. Did she really only have a candle in here?

"When did...." A sharp pain shot through his lungs as he still tried to catch his breath. His throat burned. He really should work out more. "When did you go to sleep outside?" 

Her eyes edged open to the sound of his voice again, her expression completely serene and sleepy as though he'd caught her napping on the sofa. "Are you in my bedroom Harvey?" The last of his breath escaped out in a half laugh as he leaned in and felt the skin on her arm. 

She was still ice cold. Her normally tanned skin had gone especially pale and her lips were tinged with blue. He leaned into her and looked carefully at her fingers. No frostbite that he could see. 

He ignored her question. "Rae, do you remember what time it was when you fell asleep outside?" He turned and grabbed the matches and lit one, tossing it into the fireplace. Plenty of fresh wood still lay there and, after a few more matches he both realised he had no idea how to actually light a fire and hoped that putting in some fire with the wood would help them catch. He needed to get more warmth in the room. Rae's lips were still tinged with blue and her skin was pale.

He poked around the wood and they started to catch. As he looked over at her she stayed asleep, a blissful smile on her face. He pulled a patchwork quilt that was bunched at the bottom of her bed over her cold body and began to rub her exposed arms and legs. She began to shiver and stir and rolled over, reaching her hand up and grasped at his arm. 

"Thanks Harvey." She murmured. Her slightly goofy expression still betrayed the fact that she was half asleep and as though he needed any more reassurance she whispered, "Are you coming to bed?" 

Her voice was calm; as though she'd said the words a hundred times before and Harvey looked down at her with desperate eyes. But he didn't answer. He went back to the fire and gave it a few more pokes with the long metal rod that was propped up on the side. Quickly the fire began to roar and the room warmed up so much that he slipped off his heavy overcoat.

She lay still curled on the bed as Harvey knelt down next to her head. Her body was starting to heat up but was still cold to the touch. The blue was gone from her lips as Harvey idly ran his fingers over them. He tried to convince himself he was checking them for cold related injury but knew it was that he simply wanted to touch her. 

Is this a wise decision, he asked himself as he settled what he'd do in his head. What is she going to think when she wakes up in the morning? 

He took off his suit coat, kicked the snow boots into the corner of the room and lay down in the bed behind her. Without hesitation she shuffled herself back onto him and they were soon knotted around one another, spooning. 

He rested his arm over her and was glad to feel her body coming back to life and her skin began to warm up. He could leave now, more than likely. He could make sure she wasn't in any danger and then go back to the clinic and he'd see her tomorrow when she came by to get her stitches out. But even though he considered a dozen reasons that it was the best thing to do he remained sided up next to her, the two of them lying in foetal positions curled up to one another with no space between them. 

He breathed in the scent of her and almost moaned into the back of her neck. He nestled his nose into her dark hair and could pick out the familiar scent of rose and vanilla that she liked to wear. He gave her arm another brisk rub in a half attempt to show he was doing this for medical need only, and was grateful to see it back to its normal tone. She lazily reached back for his hand and pulled it over her stomach, snuggling further into him. 

This was it. This is what he'd spent so many evenings imagining. All he'd wanted since he'd met Rae for that first time was to be so close to her that he could feel her hair tickle his face and have them curled up with one another. How had it even happened that he'd got so lucky? That she'd chosen him? Of all the people in town she could have chosen to be with, she picked him. A cowardly small town doctor with no prospects or ambitions other than to just keep her close and safe. 

He loved her. 

Damn, he was in even deeper than he realised. It was no longer a simple crush. He was in love with her and wanted to spend every single day for the rest of his possible mediocre existence making her happy. 

He gripped her tighter and she responded with a contended sigh. 

"Harvey?" She asked drowsily. He moved his hand down onto her stomach and she knotted her fingers with his. "Don't go home?"

"I wasn't planning to." He muttered, exhaustion now fogging his own mind as well. He pulled the quilt over the two of them and silently decided he wasn't going back to a life of lying awake and alone in his apartment. If she'd let him he wanted to share his life with her. Starting tonight. 

The last thing he thought of as he drifted off to sleep was a summers day with Rae and he sitting on a swing on the farmhouse porch, watching a little boy with glasses running around the farm with a stick.

 

\----

 

When Harvey woke the next morning he found himself alone in a room he didn't recognise. The alarm hadn't sounded and he flipped over, grasping subconsciously for it on the nightstand. The sharp smell of ash filled the air and he looked around for something he recognised. 

The room was bright as sunshine cascaded in, creating a square pool of yellow on the hardwood floor. A mirror hung by the window with a shawl tucked into the corner and a fireplace simmered an old blaze by the bed. 

His face relaxed as he recognised the smell of Rae's perfume and the night before came rushing back. But where was the bedrooms owner? Had she been furious at him staying and taken herself off to calm herself down? She's specifically said she didn't want to take their relationship further until she was sure. Did she think he'd taken advantage of her? 

His stomach lurched as he imagined what she must have thought of him. Swinging his legs around his bare feet hit the cold floor. Through the sickness in his belly he smelled something delicious wafting through the house. Familiar and reassuring scents mingling with something different he couldn't quite place. 

Looks like if I have to face the music she's at least providing coffee to go with it, he thought to himself. She can't have been that mad or she'd just have woken him and kicked him out.....right?

Hesitantly he walked through the short corridor, not sure what he'd find on the other side. But what he saw made him smile in spite of himself and he leaned against the wall leading into the living area. "Good morning..." he said quietly. 

Rae spun from where she was nursing something on the stove and offered him a mischievous grin. "Good morning." She responded and lifted the pan onto the dining table which was set with plates and cutlery. "Ready to eat?" She was wrapped in the quilt that normally lay over the back of the sofa and was wearing boot style slippers. 

So she wasn't angry with him. Or, if she was, she was hiding it well. 

He smoothed down his shirt politely but futilely and sat down at the table where she lifted some bacon on his plate and spooned him some eggs from a bowl in front of him. She did the same to her own plate and returned the pan to the stove, licking her fingers. She came back with a large pot of coffee and poured him some, again without asking if he wanted it. She knew he wanted it. 

He nodded at her with thanks and the two sat in silence for a few mouthfuls, Harvey grateful for the food as it stemmed the nausea he was still getting over from the whole situation. Eventually she laid her fork on the half full plate and rubbed her mouth with a napkin, taking a long draw of the cup of coffee in front of her. 

"I'm sorry."

His eyebrows furrowed. "You've got to stop saying sorry when you've nothing to be sorry about."

"Maybe," she muttered taking another long drink. "But I know you felt you needed to stay and look after me last night. And....I'm grateful. I sort of remember parts of last night but not all of it. I remember you carrying me into bed."

His cheeks pinked and he took a sip from the mug to try and mask it. Reassuring coffee slipped down his throat and he sighed gently. "I did. And I promise I only stayed because I was really worried about you."

"As my doctor?" She joked lifting her fork again and cocking an eyebrow.

"And as...." His mind raced as he thought about how he was going to define himself. He'd done it at the clinic without thinking but this time there was no emergency. "And as your boyfriend Rae." He smiled at her and she gave him a knowing look. 

"I'm sorry I made you worry. But I can't say I was sorry when I woke up this morning with you tangled up all around me." His cheeks went from pink to crimson at that and an uncomfortable noise emerged from his throat She reached for his free hand and linked her fingers with him. "Maybe it's something we should do to more often?"

He looked at her peaceful expression, her hair still tousled from the night before and her eyes still dozy from sleep. He couldn't think of anything he wanted more than to see that sight every day. He nodded and gripped her hand ever tighter.

"Are you sure about this?" He wasn't sure if he was offering her an excuse to back out because of his own cowardice. But he desperately wanted to lean over and kiss her and his stomach churned again as he wanted for her answer. 

"I'm very, very sure..." she whispered as she stood up, pulling him with her and lifting her mouth to his, kissing him deeply. 

Harvey was sure too.


	24. A Mysterious Note

The knocking door was nothing more than a formality now since Basil barked and ran at the entry way any time he heard someone approach with his ultra-sensitive hearing. So when Rae opened the door and found no one there her first instinct was to gently scold the Labrador for his enthusiasm. But as soon as the door was open he bolted out and ran off down the porch, towards the lane leading to town. He stopped at the farm's boundary, as he always did, but Rae thought she'd seen a hint of someone moving away as she peered in the distance. 

 

Eventually, once she saw no one was there, Basil came bounding back with his tongue hanging out cheerily. But instead of trying to run back into the warmth of the house as he'd been doing recently he headed towards the mail box and ran round it in circles, barking enthusiastically as he did. 

 

Just as she was about to go back to her cup of tea and cheesy romance novel, Rae noticed the red arm of the mailbox was stuck high in the air; peculiar since it was early afternoon and she was sure the mailman had already visited that morning. Abandoning all ideas of staying in the warm farmhouse she grabbed the shawl from the back of the sofa, wrapped it around her shivering body and shooed Basil away from the mailbox, reaching down to stroke him with her free hand. 

 

The mailbox was open just a crack, a corner of white paper sticking out. She reached out for it and immediately recognised the owners stereotypical doctor scrawl. 

 

"Rae, I have a surprise for you. Meet me by the railroad tracks. Harvey." 

 

She narrowed her eyes but smiled knowingly. What was he up to? Pulling the shawl tighter around herself she snapped her fingers for Basil to come back into the house. He obeyed readily now she'd seen the note. 

 

Better grab my coat, she thought to herself as she thumbed the note absently. 

 

\--- 

 

There was virtually no snow by the railroad tracks, likely because the areas was so protected against the elements by the surrounding vast mountains. Rae hadn't been up here since she'd lugged her suitcases off the train nearly a year ago. Wow, had it really been nearly a whole year she'd been in Pelican Town? So much had changed and as she thought back to the naive city slicker who'd thought that reading a book on crowing crops would prepare her for a life as a farmer she laughed softly to herself. 

 

Harvey's back was to her as she stood at the other side of the tracks so she enjoyed a few moments of affectionate and silent staring. He was wearing his dark winter jacket and boots but his hair was messed as though he'd just woken up. Rae longed to run her fingers through it and considered quietly sneaking up behind him and engulfing him in a hug but decided he was probably more likely to jump out of his skin than sink into her embrace. 

 

"Hello Mysterious Note Writer..." he turned to look at her and his face broke into a satisfied grin. His cheeks were stung pink with the cold and he wrung his hands slightly in his dark gloves then blew into them to try and warm them up. 

 

"There you are. Just in time." She could have sworn he winked at her uncharacteristically but she giggled anyway. 

 

She looked at him playfully and shrugged. "What am I just in time for?" Harvey cocked his head and purposefully separated his hands, leaving them dangling awkwardly at his sides. 

 

He pointed up and, as he did, Rae saw a large shadow engulf the ground. "Look, here it comes." Harvey was desperately trying to sound casual and nonchalant but Rae could hear his voice hitch up an octave at the end of every sentence. 

 

This was not the tone of a relaxed man. 

 

Rae looked upwards to see what was causing the encroaching darkness but struggled to see as the sun streamed in from behind the large structure. Holding her hand up to shield her eyes she could still only see a rough shape appearing from the sky. 

 

Harvey grabbed her hand and pulled her backwards just as a hot air balloon dropped heavily on the ground a few feet away. The mountain was suddenly in silence as the flame disappeared and the peculiar looking man in the purple suit and top hat grinned at them manically. Although Rae did fancy she could hear the thunder of Harvey's heart beating in his nervous chest. 

 

"Marcello's Balloon Rentals at your service!" The grey beard that covered most of his face bobbed cheerily as he stretched his arms out and practically shouted at the pair. He looked like an old snake oil peddler who's default facial position was 'ecstatic'. Rae wasn't one to back down from enthusiasm but this guy was bordering on maniacal. 

 

Rae's eyes drifted from the peculiar little man to his transportation. A balloon ride? Rae side-eyed Harvey with scepticism and gripped onto his hand a little tighter. She'd never been on a hot air balloon before but the prospect of seeing the entire Valley made her skin tingle with anticipation. Her face cracked into a grin as the odd man launched himself out of the basket with much more poise than Rae would have guessed he was capable of. He landed on the ground in front of them with a thud. 

 

"It's all yours for two hours. Now I was told there was a saloon around here?" He wandered off, leaving the pair standing in front of the balloon sharing slightly bemused expressions. He seemed like the sort that might drink Gus out of house and home but Rae was sure Pam would be glad of a new drinking buddy. 

 

The balloon was navy blue with a slightly worrying large patch hastily covering one side. Rae wondered if it was prone to punctures but decided highlighting that to Harvey might not be a wise choice. He led her towards the basket with the large M on the site and they both peered inside to see a slightly open picnic basket that seemed to hold a bottle of champagne and two flutes. 

 

"I saw an ad in the paper for these balloon rides and I know I had to surprise you with one." Rae thought back to a month before where she'd mentioned wanting to see the whole area as a bird did; she hadn't even thought Harvey had been paying attention but here they were, about to see the whole town from the sky. Her eyes began to sparkle with tears so she took a gulp of cold air to steel herself and chewed on her lip. 

 

Harvey's expression and tight grip on her hand betrayed his own teetering emotional state. She stroked his fingers with hers as the wind whipped at the balloon and made it gently sway from side to side in the valley. "....but aren't you afraid of heights?" She asked, remembering Harvey's admission that it was one of the many reasons he'd never be a pilot. She looked at him sadly, a tinge of guilt that she might have hurt his feelings by voicing her concern. 

 

"I am....yeah." He started straight ahead at the basked and ran the fingers of his free hand over the top. She was sure he'd be wringing his hands if she hadn't been holding one. "But I'm determined not to let that stop me from doing what I want and experiencing this with you." 

 

The tears in Rae's eyes threatened even harder and she swallowed a lump that was forming in her throat. "Courage isn't being fearless Harvey; its doing things even though you're scared." 

 

"I'll try not to be scared." He reassured her and he lifted his leg over the side of the basket and vaulted in with one arm. Rae almost laughed at the shock of him managing it with ease and stretched her own leg over the basket and held on to one of the ropes. But she judged the swing badly and her boot caught on the side of the rope, causing her to tumble into the basket in an inelegant heap. 

 

She grimaced at Harvey, her cheeks dark with embarrassment. He reached down for her and pulled her up close to him where she stared into a mixture of worry and affection. "Maybe I should fall over more often if this is where it ends up." She gave him a suggestive raised eye but his nerves were clearly taking over. He looked around and up towards the balloon itself. 

 

"Do you know how to fly one of these?" She asked. He nodded. Perhaps she should have asked if he'd ever actually been in one before but worried it would come across as distrust. She knew he wouldn't be doing this unless he was absolutely certain and had assessed many potential outcomes. So predictable her man. 

 

Harvey pulled the cord, the flame grew in the balloon and the basket began to lift from the ground. It shook gently and Rae watched Harvey's own shaking grow more violent. She wrapped her hand around his and offered him her most reassuring smile. It worked for about a half a second but he looked down and terror filled his face. She pulled him in closer and wrapped herself around him. "Don't worry..." she whispered into his ear as they rose higher in the pink sky and the world began to fall away beneath their feet. 

 

The climb was steady and, before long, they were high above the town just below the clouds. Rae looked down at the town, her hand still tight in Harvey's, but leaned over the edge for a better look. Harvey's face turned ever paler as Rae's steps tipped the basket a little and eventually he pulled her back. 

 

"We....we're up so high." Rae could hear him gulp in his throat and leaned back to be closer to him. He snuggled into her and she felt his whole body shake with fear. "I wanted to impress you but look at me I'm a trembling coward." His breath was ragged and his chest heaved. There was nothing even hinting at enjoyment in his expression. His eyes fell and he ruffled his moustache as the balloon swept slightly to the left and rose with the irregular gusts of wind. 

 

"You are not a trembling coward." Rae insisted. She turned him to look at her and stared hard at him. Did he realise how important it was he'd even tried this? Even stepped into the basket in the first place? 

 

Enclosed spaces, thought Rae. That was what made her as afraid as Harvey was right now. She remembered the time she'd locked herself in the pen closet when she worked at Joja and how she'd been a crying, quivering mess by the time her colleagues had found her only a few minutes later. The emotions didn't leave as soon as the door was open, they'd stayed with her a long time afterwards and caused nightmare upon nightmare. Harvey was smart enough to consider this as a possibility and by doing this, despite his fear, Rae knew this was a bigger achievement than he was giving himself credit for. 

 

He looked at her deep breathing and echoed it. He recognised that she was trying to calm him and closed his eyes tightly to focus on his inhales and exhales. A few deep breaths later and his chest was rising and falling more regularly. "Well you've got more than enough courage to make up for me Rae. That's....that's part of why I like you." 

 

She wrapped a hand around his waist and pulled him into her side so he could feel her chest move with his. A tiny smile broke on his lips. "OK I'm going to open my eyes and look down....don't let go of my hand." 

 

"Never." 

 

His eyes opened carefully and when he realised how close he was to the side of the basket he jumped back and began to shake again as his eyes tightened again. Rae wanted to shush him and hug him in close but knew that he wanted to face the fear instead of falling into her familiar embrace. "Breathe Harvey." She whispered into his ear, willing him to relax. 

 

"I think I can do it now." And he opened his eyes once more and stared at the coral coloured sky with the slowly setting sun dipping below the mountains. His bottom lip trembled still but his breathing was regulated again. They looked down and could see the waters of the lakes and ocean all interlinking and forming a beautiful blue walkway through the town. The buildings and trees looked like models from so high up and Rae bristled with happiness at the sight of everything from such a height. This was far better than she could ever have expected. Harvey looked down and, although his knuckles were probably white with fear under his gloves as they gripped onto Rae's increasingly pained hand, he was looking more and more keen to actually see the sights. 

 

As he took a further step forward he lunged back as a flock of white birds flew by the balloon, honking into the evening sky. He glared at them with fear but soon realised they weren't keen on coming towards the balloon. He looked at her with adoration. 

 

"Well Harvey, what do you think?" Rae asked tentatively. 

 

"Hey, this is incredible." Colour started to return to his face. "I think I can see Mayor Lewis standing in the town square." Rae looked down and could see the Mayor standing outside in the snow chatting to what looked like Marnie. After a few moments she and Harvey watched as the pair suddenly seemed to merge together and seemed to be...hugging? As realisation hit about what they were doing Rae began to cackle into her scarf. 

 

"Oh Mayor Lewis you dog..." she laughed. Harvey smiled and shook his head gently as he pulled his glove back over his wrist. 

 

"Oh dear, our time's almost up." Harvey seemed genuinely disappointed as he continued to look at the town over the side of the basket. He looked at her as though he was struggling to find the courage to say something so Rae smiled at him patiently. "Um Rae, we've known each other a while now and...I....er...." 

 

How was he still struggling to tell her how he thought, mused Rae. He knew she liked him. She knew he liked her. She knew she loved him. It all seemed so clear to her. And as he leaned in to kiss her she tilted her head slightly as her lips nearly touched his ear and whispered. 

 

"I love you Harvey. You don't need to say it back but it's important to me that you know that I do." She felt his chest still as he held his breath. She didn't give him the chance to respond as she touched her lips to his, the kiss starting tentatively but progressing into a tight embrace as the pair clung to one another as it increased in heat. Rae's hand travelled further downwards as she felt the basket sway under their feet. The frigid evening air was the only thing stopping her from undressing him and taking him right there on the basket floor. As she pulled back she could see a similar desire burned in his eyes. Instead she pressed her hips into his and ravaged his mouth with her own again. 

 

For now they'd have to settle for that, but the emerging blaze between the two confirmed what Rae had long suspected. She wanted every single part of Harvey; to be as close to him as one person could be with another. She desperately hoped he felt the same.


	25. A Friend in Need

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay on this chapter folks! It's been crazy busy here. I'm away next week too so the next chapter might be a tad late too I'm afraid....

Rae didn't want to leave Shane at the cliffs, surrounded by rusting beer cans and lying in the heavy rain but she knew there was no way she could carry him all the way to the clinic alone. And she was pretty sure he wasn't going to be too steady on his feet. 

Instead she ran, full pelt, gasping and panting all the way into town and banged heavily on the clinic door. She waited, her throat burning with exertion and rain running down her face, until finally Harvey opened the door. 

His expression was worried. "Rae, what's wrong?"

She took a large gulp of breath and let the whole thing out in one long gasp. "ShaneisdownbythecliffsandhesreallyclosetotheedgeandIthinkweneedtogogethimandbringhimhere."

Harvey shook his head as he processed what she said and he grabbed his coat from the hook by the door. "You left him?"

She threw him an angry look. "He said he wasn't going to do anything stupid. In fact he said he wanted to come here."

Harvey averted her gaze as they started to walk towards the path to the cliffs. He mumbled an apology but Rae was too exhausted to respond.

"Had he vomited?" 

"Not that I could see....or smell." She wrinkled her nose as the meadow came into view and she could hear rushing water down the cliff face. The rain was starting to come down harder now and Rae was very aware of the fact that when she'd left the farmhouse it had been overcast but dry so she wasn't exactly dressed for warmth. Harvey must have noticed too because he took off his outer coat and slung it around her shoulders. 

"Now you're going to get wet." She protested, looking around the horizon for Shane's form.

"Don't worry about it." He smiled weakly at her and she paused, searching for where she'd left Shane. A flash of worry in her stomach seared as she imagined him rolling off the cliff in his drunken state. 

The air hung grey and heavy with rain, so seeing more than a few steps in front of her face was a challenge. Suddenly she remembered he'd been by the sewer exit, the smell had stayed with her for the first few minutes of the conversation where Shane told her how close he'd come to doing something drastic. 

"Come on. He's over here." She pulled at Harvey's arm as he hopelessly tried to wipe the raindrops from his glasses. "Shane!" Rae called but there was no answer. A crack of lightening lit up the meadows and she saw him lying on his stomach a dozen metres away. Harvey noticed him too as the pair started off towards his unconscious body. 

"Shane!" Harvey called as he ran towards him, sliding on the sodden ground next to him. He felt for his pulse as Rae stood over the pair, uncharacteristically too nervous to speak. Rae tried to ignore the storm but she was having to work hard to keep her anxiety under control. She definitely wasn't going to lose it now, in front of Harvey. Not again. The stakes were too high this time and suddenly her fear seemed to push into her subconscious much easier than it had before. 

"Is he--" She called over another clap of thunder.

"No. No he's OK. But he definitely needs to get back to the clinic." He looked down closely at the drunken man. "Shane it's Harvey, can you open your eyes?"

He grunted and Rae's shoulders slouched with relief. Harvey looked up to her. "Think you can help me back with him or should I get Sam or--"

"I'll carry him." She said as she heaved her body under Shane's free arm. The pair had to push up to carry the dead weight and shared a strained look as they began to walk with him slouched over both of their shoulders. They hobbled with him but every few steps his feet would slip in the slick mud and they nearly toppled over into a heap. It didn't help that Harvey's glasses were now entirely fogged up so any navigation was down to Rae. 

She looked across to Harvey to give him a comforting look but he was too busy trying to put one step in front of the other to notice. 

 

\---

 

It took about an hour of back breaking struggle before they arrived at the clinic. Stopping every ten minutes or so to readjust and, while Rae had hoped Shane might come to and be able to walk himself, it hadn't happened. The only thing he'd managed to do other than the occasional grunt and groan was to vomit down his front, hitting most of Rae's leg in the process. 

When they'd eventually managed to get Shane through the doors of the clinic, Harvey stood by him and insisted Rae go upstairs to get a shower. She'd insisted she wanted to stay with Shane but in the end he'd given her a look of sympathy and told her she probably didn't want to be around; the next part wasn't pretty. 

Rae lugged herself up the stairs, trying desperately to breath through her mouth to avoid the rising vomit fumes from her pants. She kicked off her boots that had, surprisingly, stayed untouched and peeled the jeans off her limp legs. Hoisting her vest over her head and slipping out of her underwear she left a trail of clothes as she headed towards the bathroom and switched on the cascading hot water from Harvey's grubby shower.

She stepped into the flow from the shower and threw her head back as the hot rushes fell over her aching body. Her throat tightened and in the solitude of the shower she let out the sobs that had been threatening for the last hour. Her body convulsed with angry cries as she rested her body against the frigid white tiles and let all the worry and fear out that had been building since she initially saw Shane lying unresponsive on the cliffs. 

How could he want to die? Wasn't he afraid? 

Rae swallowed a lump in her throat and realised it was more likely that Shane was afraid to live. She hadn't been there for him enough. She hadn't done enough. If she'd been there for him more, supported him more and offered herself to him as a sounding board would he still feel as utterly desperate as he had? Or would she at least have realised how bad it was before it had reached tonight's climax?

She ran her hand through the water that was sinking into her hair and flattening it against her neck. A quick survey showed there was no shampoo and only an old cracked bar of soap living in the shower. She scrubbed her body with it anyway, trying to wash away the guilt that lay on her like oil. It didn't work. Instead her skin just felt red and angry.

She stood a few moments more, motionless and sunken eyed before turning the water dial off, her arms braced on the wall in front of her. Droplets of water flowed down her legs and arms like tiny rivers as she pulled back the greying shower curtain and the cold air hit her naked body. The towel on the rack was still slightly damp and when she lifted it to herself she inhaled Harvey's scent in deeply; a comforting tonic to an otherwise hellish afternoon. 

She wrapped it around herself and sopped slightly wet footprints out into the silent apartment where she retrieved her clothes and pulled on her underwear and bra. As she finished connecting her clasp the door to the apartment opened. 

Harvey stood, still slightly damp and nervous looking as Rae stared over at him. "Is he going to be OK?"

He nodded and Rae rushed over, her arms engulfing him in gratitude, feeling her wet hair tip onto his shoulder. She sniffed the last of her tears away and thanked him under her breath. His own wet clothes stuck to her and as he pulled away she leaned in and kissed him deeply. Being confronted with mortality, even though it wasn't her own, had suddenly made her want to cling to him and never let go. They stood like that for a while, the ticking clock on the bedside table the only sound other than the thumping of her heart in her chest.

He smiled as they broke apart. "Come down and see him." She unstuck and nodded, taking a step back. "Maybe not like that though? There are some pants of mine in the top drawer when you're ready."

She nodded gingerly and lifted the towel up from where she had dropped it on the floor, silently hoping that seeing Shane wasn't going to turn her into a blubbering wreck again...

 

\---

Harvey's jeans gripped her hips a little too snugly as she walked down the stairs; an uncomfortable reminder that she wasn't so small in that particular area. And she didn't want to even think about how tight they felt around her ass. They pooled at her ankles and she kept hitching them up to no effect. 

Better than vomit scented pants though Rae, she reminded herself. 

The clinic was quiet apart from the beeping of a machine behind the curtain and the sound of the rain hitting the windows. She pulled the curtain back to show Harvey checking Shane's blood pressure on the machine and noting it on a pad of paper. He saw her come in and shuffled the papers away, the beeping sound on the machine coming to an abrupt halt at the push of a button. It still popped up with changing numbers every so often but she had no idea what any of it meant. 

"How is he?" She asked. Her voice felt small against the enormity of the situation they were in. 

"I've pumped his stomach and re-hydrated his body. He's going to be OK." Harvey skirted around the bed as Rae stared down at Shane, his face pale and body still. The IV line that went into his arm draped over the side of the bed and she made sure not to lean on it. "It's good that you brought him in though."

"We brought him in. There's no way I could have hauled him in here by myself." Her face crumpled and she swallowed hard. "I can't imagine how hard things must be for him to have wanted to do this." A stale smell of alcohol still hung in the air making Rae feel queasy. Would she ever smell beer again without thoughts of this evening coming rushing back to her? 

"Too much alcohol is terrible for the body but right now I'm most worried about his mental health. When he comes to I'll have a chat with him about his treatment options. I know an excellent counsellor in Zuzu City." Rae nodded and fiddled nervously with the bottom of her vest. Harvey closed his hand over hers. "Life can be painful sometimes. But there's always hope for a better future. You've got to believe that." She looked at him and nodded. Both of them knew pain and loneliness. She certainly knew how it felt to wonder if everything you were doing was completely meaningless. But he was right, there was always the prospect of something wonderful happening that would turn it all around. She hoped Shane would find a way to see that too. 

She released her hand from Harvey's and wrapped it around Shane's warm and clammy hand. Harvey stiffened beside her and he took a long breath to steady himself. 

"Do you love him?" There was heartache in his voice. It was a brave question; one that might not have got him the answer he was looking for and, without looking away from Shane, Rae could tell Harvey was sick at the thought of what she might say. 

"No." She said simply. "I love you."

"And I love you." He rested his head against her wet hair and put his hand around her waist. 

"I'm going to keep him here tonight. Would it-- would it make you feel better if you stayed here? Upstairs I mean?" Shane coughed and his face twisted in pain. Rae leaned in and whispered his name but he didn't respond. "I promise I'll let you know if there's any change." 

Rae signed deeply. The thought of curling up and going to sleep made her body sing with relief but the guilt made her hand tighten harder around her friend's. She'd already left him once today. Luckily he was fine last time but would he be if she abandoned him again? 

Her eyes closed as the magnitude of the day threatened to overwhelm her. The headache that had been creeping up her neck had firmly planted itself behind her eyes and she squeezed them hard. Sleep would be good. Escape would be good.

"i'll head upstairs." Harvey walked round the bed and opened a drawer, producing a tiny bottle.

"Take two of these. They'll take the edge off the headache." She looked at him sceptically. "They're just painkillers Rae."

She took the offered pills and the plastic cup of water he'd run for her. Knocking back the tablets with the water she felt the sting of tears which spiked the pain in her head. 

She started towards the door. "You'll come up at some point though right?" Harvey nodded and picked the clipboard back up to note the updated stats on the screen. 

"Of course." He paused and his shoulders relaxed. "I love you."

"And I love you."

As she climbed the stairs to the apartment she promised herself she'd tell him that every single day.


	26. A Budding Romance

There was no denying Rae had been hurt when Harvey had indicated he was reluctant to eat at the Saloon that Friday evening. He'd stood, awkwardly huffing and trying to think of reasons why they couldn't do it when Rae's eyes glazed with tears and she nodded. 

"You'd rather not be seen with me?" 

The fact that he hadn't instantly denied it and told her it was something completely different hadn't helped either. But he hadn't anticipated that response and didn't have an answer. So she'd gone back to the farm mumbling something about making her own dinner and coming by the next day. Or maybe the day after that. 

This is why you've never been in a real relationship Harvey, he reminded himself. You're shit at it. 

So when he knocked at the door he wasn't surprised to see her standing there in a vest and plaid pyjama bottoms nursing a warmed up mug of what smelled like soup. She peered at him over it, gently blowing and narrowed her eyes. 

"You're not getting any soup." At least she hadn't lost her sense of humour...

"Get dressed and lets go to the Saloon..." He suggested, padding his feet around in the cold, his hands tucked firmly into his pockets and his head pulled down into the raised collar of his coat.

"Ugh..." she turned tail and headed into the farmhouse but left the door open for him to follow. Which he did, gratefully. 

Basil barely lifted a head from his spot on the sofa when Harvey kicked the excess snow off his boots and nudged the door behind him closed. Rae sat down with the soup and pulled the blanket over her. 

It wasn't like her to sulk, he thought. He moved around to be in front of her, conscious she wasn't meeting his eyes. "Are you not going to talk to me all night? This isn't like you."

"Is it like you to be embarrassed of me?" Harvey had to strain not to roll his eyes but even he could see that wasn't going to help the situation any. Instead he nudged Basil reluctantly off the sofa and sat down next to her. The TV whittered softly as the weather report suggested the snow was nearing its end. 

"I'm obviously not embarrassed of you Rae. Why would I be?"

"Why don't you want to be seen with me then?"

"It's not that. I suppose it's just going to prompt a lot of questions--"

"It's going to happen sooner or later Harvey. We live in a town with a couple dozen people. They might notice that we tend to be seen together from now on."

She was right of course. He wasn't ashamed to be seen with her. But there was still a niggle in the back of his mind that people would look at he pair of them and wonder what the hell she was thinking choosing Harvey. What the hell she could possible see in him. Rae could have literally anyone she wanted, he assumed. 

It wasn't that he was embarrassed to be seen with her. He was embarrassed for her to be seen with him. 

"Come on. Get out those pyjamas." She offered him a suggestive raised brow and this time he did roll his eyes. "Well you can keep them on I suppose but your ankles will get cold."

She faux protested for a moment but eventually stood up, dumped the mug of soup by the sink and went into the bedroom to get dressed. He debated following her through but knew if he did they wouldn't be going anywhere this evening, and he'd already run all the potential scenarios through his head. Tempting though it was to spend the night doing something altogether more pleasant than sitting being stared at by half the town.

He didn't hear many clothes changing sounds coming from the bedroom and half wondered if she'd had the same idea and was waiting for him. Eventually though he heard her bustling around and soon she came out sporting a pair of purple pants on and a brown blouse, desperately trying to gather her masses of dark hair with a ribbon. Eventually she did, hair still spilling over her face in strands and she stood, hand on hip. 

"You're buying--right."

It didn't sound like a question. 

\---

There were even more people there than usual which made Harvey instantly regret forcing the issue. Rae looked back to him with a smile that was clearly meant to be soothing but only served to make him more nervous. As always whenever the familiar door chime sounded, everyone looked over and offered a polite smile before going back to their conversations or games. 

As they walked towards the bar a number of people called greetings and they offered them back. Most people's stares lingered a little longer than usual and some included knowing smiles but everyone made a point of leaving the couple to it. 

Everyone except Abigail. 

She came running through from where she'd been watching Sam and Sebastian play the same game of pool they'd been playing for the last year and inserted herself between the couple and Clint who was waiting patiently on a beer at the bar. 

"Hello you two...." she cooed. Harvey instantly felt his face flush and looked around panicked. Rae leaned in but before she went to tuck her arm into his like she normally did she froze. An odd expression appeared as though a realisation had hit. The sudden change in atmosphere made Abigail lose her cutesy voice. "Are you OK?"

"Yes. Just in for some dinner." Rae's tone was clipped as she turned around to face Gus. "Can we get a couple plates of eggplant parmesan?" He nodded at the pair as he handed Clint his fresh beer. 

Rae shuffled off to the table by the window. The same one he'd been sitting in with Maru when Rae had come in and become all flustered at the sight of them. Thinking back to that evening Harvey couldn't believe it had nearly been a year ago. So much had changed; he had changed and as he squeezed in next to Rae he lifted his hand onto hers and tapped it gently to the beat of the soft rock drifting out of the jukebox in a way he'd learned tended to make her anxiety defuse.

"Are you OK?" He asked. She shifted in her seat and looked over to the corner where Marnie sat trying to get some vegetable medley into a very reluctant Jas. 

"Yeah I'm fine. You were right though. Everyone's staring." Harvey looked around and, right enough, at his glance everyone's heads flitted back to what they'd been doing previously but no one was fooled they'd been doing anything other than staring. The room was nearly full and the only person from town that didn't seem to be there was Penny, as usual. 

He exchanged a smile with Pierre who glanced over from his own table on the other side of the room and clasped his hand over Rae's even tighter. "You were the one who said it would happen sooner or later."

"I know, I just didn't think people would outright stare..." She fidgeted in her seat and looked around for Gus. He'd gone from behind the bar, likely to plate up their food. Instead Emily gave an enthusiastic wave from a pause in her glass wiping. Rae's shoulders started to settle. "I guess they're just pleased for us?"

As Harvey looked up he watched Shane disappear through to the room where Sam was shouting at Sebastian for taking too long with his shot. Was he feeling put out that Rae and Harvey had come out together? A sudden realisation hit him and all the things Shane had done fell into place. He had feelings for Rae too. Yoba, that wasn't good. Shane was just starting to get things together. If Harvey was right and he did like Rae then seeing the pair of them together was going to be the same slap in the face that Rae had felt the night she saw he and Maru all those months ago.

But as he turned to her with her newly relaxed smile he completely understood why anyone would fall for her. It was figuring out what it was she saw in him that was the tricky part. 

"Here you go guys. Save some room for Evelyn's homemade cookies - there's some in a jar behind the bar. If Emily's left any that is..." Gus grumbled as he walked away. 

Rae pushed her fork around on the plate of food as the steam rose from it invitingly. Harvey lifted a forkful of it to his mouth and sighed as the cheesy goodness hit his tongue. He looked over to see if Rae was enjoying hers but she'd laid her fork down by her plate. 

"I didn't realise I'd find this so uncomfortable. It's like being an animal in a zoo."

He was just about to ask if she wanted to leave when they looked up to see Pam swaying slightly towards their corner table. Her face donned a slightly lopsided smile and the nearly empty beer in her hand looked perilously close to tipping onto Gus' floor. Although Harvey suspected that wasn't the first time that might have happened. 

"Aw lovebirds!" She cackled loudly. There was no malice in it but Pam wasn't known to be subtle at the best of times and her sense of timing was far from ideal. "So, you two officially a couple now?"

The room fell silent. People didn't lower themselves to look across but the room's sea of conversation halted as they tried to pretend they weren't listening to the answer that one of the pair was going to have to give. Harvey watched as Rae's eyes darted around the room and she moved to get up and leave. Why was she so nervous herself? She didn't seem to be at all bothered earlier that the pair would be seen together. What had changed?

"Actually," started Harvey as he rose himself, clapping a hand on Pam's wobbling arm. "We are. Together. As a couple. Rae and I..." He was starting to ramble now so decided to cut himself short. His voice had been loud enough that even with the lulling music coming from the jukebox there was no denying that everyone in the saloon, and therefore the town, knew exactly where the pair stood. 

He looked down at Rae, expecting her to be angry that he'd announced them both to the town but instead she was smiling down at her meal. Maybe this confidence thing was an act for most people, he thought. 

Pam's curiosity sated, she returned back to the bar, leaving only the expected thin trail of beer in her wake. 

The noise levels in the saloon suddenly expanded once more as everyone resumed their conversations. Harvey sat down and tucked back into his dinner. Rae chest swelled as she looked at him with an expression of satisfaction. 

"I guess everyone knows now." 

"I guess so." He said through his mouth of food.

 

\---

"Why did you suddenly get so nervous about everyone finding out if we were together?" Harvey's arm was linked with Rae's as the pair walked back to the farm in the growing darkness. 

She stayed silent, the only sound coming from an echoing whoo of an owl in the distance. The frost on the ground was disappearing, the season approaching its end. 

"I don't know," she started quietly. She shrugged into his shoulder as the farmhouse came into view. "I suppose it all just seemed a little more...official...than I expected." They climbed the few steps to the front door and Rae pulled the key from her pocket and turned it in the lock. 

Harvey followed her in as she flicked the switch on the light in the living room, casting a warm glow over Rae's cosy home. Basil padded from his spot on the bed and relaxed himself again on a warm spot behind the sofa. Harvey took off his gloves and scarf, realising with a warm feeling in his stomach that although he hadn't been invited they both assumed he'd be staying the night. It made the next question a lot harder to ask. 

"Do you not want it to be official?" He struggled to keep his voice level as he hung the coat and scarf on the hook by the door. Rae tilted her head at him curiously. 

"Of course I do. It's just that..."

"What?"

"Well don't you think people are going to wonder what you see in me?"

He stood, his mouth open for a few seconds, blinking. What on earth was she talking about?

"What do you mean?"

"Well they're going to look at us and wonder what an intelligent and sweet guy like you is doing with a fairly average farmer like me who has--" 

She stopped when he started laughing. It wasn't even just laughing; the roars coming from his chest made him gulp for air and he had to lean himself on the sofa to steady himself as a tight pain seared across his stomach from the amusement. The outburst took a long time to die away and as he looked up, tears fogging his glasses, he could barely see the bemused but slightly cross look on Rae's face. 

"Are you done?" She asked, her arms crossed tightly around herself.

That made him start again, more subdued this time but still the house echoed with his laughter as he clutched his shaking upper body. Rae shook her head as she filled the teapot up with hot water. 

"You can't be serious dear." He took off his glasses and wiped them on his shirt as he headed over to the fuzzy mass of colour that was Rae. She flicked the heat under the teapot and stared back at him. "You really think they're wondering why I'M with YOU?"

"Well you're.....and I'm....." she started but she obviously wasn't sure where she was going with it. Like he the years of insecurity weren't going to disappear overnight. Loneliness and solitude were a more gripping pair than he'd have liked. The two went back to the sofa and sat down, their bodies tipping towards one another as they did. 

"Rae, no one's wondering why I've chosen you. You're kind and funny and smart and beautiful. You make people feel like they're the only one in the room when they're with you. You remember ridiculously insignificant details about people because you see it's important to them. You never judge anyone for what they've done or what they haven't done. You're humble and sweet and appreciate all the little things people do for you. And you do all those things effortlessly. You're just....you're _bewitching_ Rae."

She stared at him with an open mouth and glassy eyes as he spoke. But it all just seemed so obvious to Harvey; didn't she know these things about herself? 

She launched herself towards him and closed her mouth on his, kissing him deeply. He wrapped his arm around her back and grasped her on top of him, their mouths entwined as Harvey felt her fingers run down his neck and shoulders. They separated and she lifted herself off him slightly. 

"You say that to all the girls to get them into bed?" She whispered.

He sighed deeply, his face as serious as he felt as he pulled her in close and whispered in her ear. "It's true. Every word." Her expression softened and the second kiss they shared was gentle and familiar. The sort of kiss he suspected they'd share for a good few decades yet. He breathed her in and if he'd believed in souls would have realised he'd just filled his with her own.


	27. Winterstar Feast

Despite offering nothing but biting cold and icy wind for nearly a week, the snow returned in droves or the Feast of the Winter Star. Right on schedule, the night before Gus and Lewis set up all the tables, a flurry of the white stuff cascaded from the sky and settled itself right across the town. So, as it was, when the pair got up the morning of the Feast they had to spend nearly an hour clearing away small piles of snow from the areas where the tables would sit. Lewis muttered under his breath the entire time that they'd never manage it all. 

Sam and Abigail had spent most of the previous evening putting new lights and candy canes dotted around the town square while Pierre and Caroline were happily decorating a small fir tree that Rae had donated from the farm. When they'd awoken to a blanket of white on the town, the morning had been spent shaking candy canes free of the frost and making sure none of the light bulbs had blown in the wet. 

So, when Rae and Harvey ploughed through the snow on the morning of the Feast, they barely recognised the town they'd left the night before. It felt like walking into a Winter Star card as gentle carols filled the air and steaming hot chocolate was dispensed from a huge vat by the glowing tree. Wreathes were wrapped around the lampposts and glittered with soft fairy lights of a cascade of greens and reds. In the very centre of the town stood a huge tree that had also been given by Rae. She'd spent nearly an entire morning whacking away at it with her axe before Lewis and Willy had caught it and dragged it to town to serve as the centrepiece for their day.

Lewis and Marnie stood by the tree which also wore a blanket of twinkling lights and was peppered with decorations that Harvey assumed Jas and Vincent had made with Penny. The lights clung to the white speckled branches like tiny coloured snowflakes and for a moment he imagined what a Winter Star tree might look like in their own home in the future, surrounded by brightly coloured packages with little kids tearing into them wildly...

"I love that Pelican Town takes the Feast of the Winter Star so seriously!" Rae grinned as she placed her secret gift by the pile of wrapped and ribboned boxes underneath the tree. "It's lost its meaning in the city now. People just use the day as an excuse to drink right through the afternoon on their day off work." She wrinkled her nose up as Marnie smiled at her. 

Harvey placed his rather modest gift down among the parcels. Although the gift giving was intended to be a surprise, Rae had let slip to Harvey that her recipient was Leah and that she'd bought her some new canvases and oil paints. Although she'd spent a long time choosing it she'd spent every day since fretting that she'd picked the wrong thing. Even now it was going under the tree she looked at Harvey with a mixed expression of anticipation and nerves. 

"I hope it's OK..." she mumbled as she positioned it with care beneath the other gifts. 

Harvey smiled and put his own green wrapped box beside Rae's. "She'll love it Rae..."

She peered over to the tables of food where most of the families were now starting to get comfortable in groups. There were no free tables but a couple of chairs by Shane and Clint still sat vacant. She gestured over to the table. "Shall we join them?"

Harvey felt a pinch of unease in his stomach at the prospect of sitting with Shane. They hadn't spoken since the night their friend seen them in the Saloon and scarpered off but he knew they'd have to break the ice sooner or later. He nodded and they moved to the table by the tree that was laden with plates of piled food. 

As they approached Shane gave them a much easier smile than Harvey had been anticipating. Clint, on the other hand, was staring wistfully over at Emily and didn't even notice them sit down. 

"How are you guys doing?" Shane asked, his fingers fidgeting with the ladle on the bowl of mashed potato that sat in front of him. He was trying desperately to look them in the eye but his eyes darted round the gathering nervously.

"OK. Cold though..." The other man nodded and Harvey realised this was going to be an exceptionally long meal if the three of them would only extend their conversation to small talk. "How have you been?"

Shane's eyes flitted over to Clint who still was paying no attention to the conversation being held right next to him. That filled Shane with the courage he needed to be honest. "Yeah I'm OK. I've been for my appointment with the counsellor you recommended. She's pretty good. I've been talking about stuff that I didn't even realise was bothering me..."

"That's great Shane," Rae leaned in earnestly, her loose hair framing her face. "Are you going to go back?"

He nodded. "Yeah. Once a week and we'll see where things are in a few months." He pushed the ladle away as he stared up hard at Harvey, his mind clearly swimming with a lot of possibilities. "Thanks Doc. For making me do it, you know?"

"You're the one that's doing the hard part Shane. We just gave you a nudge." Harvey pushed his glasses up his nose and sat back in his chair.

He nodded and went to reply just as Lewis spoke loudly from his table on the other side of the tree. 

"Welcome everyone to the Feast of the Winter Star. Thank you to Gus for making us all of this delicious food and to everyone who's helped decorate the town square to make it as festive as it looks." Pam thanked him loudly at this although, to Harvey's knowledge, she hadn't actually taken part in any of the decorating. Lewis gave her a mollifying nod. "Let's all enjoy our feast and, once we're done, we can get on with the gift exchange!"

At that, the sound of utensils clanging and bowls being scraped echoed in the air as everyone began to pile food onto their plates. Harvey scooped potato and turkey onto his plate as Rae playfully elbowed him to reach the wine on the middle of the table. Shane held up his hand as Rae leaned into his glass, her face spreading with crimson. 

"Oh. Shane. Sorry.." she whispered uncomfortably as he grabbed a jug of juice and poured it into his glass.

He shook his head. "Don't worry. It's just easier right now not to have any."

Harvey filled Rae's plate as well as his own, leaving off the beans he knew she didn't like but heaping on the candied yams he remembered were her favourite. As they all sat down, plates full of food and anticipation growing, Clint finally looked across to the pair. "Oh, hi guys. I didn't see you sit down there!"

The others shared a laugh as he went back to looking across to Emily's table, his own plate still cold and empty. 

\---

The meal was delicious; the best Gus had ever made, mused Harvey. As he sat back in his chair, the belt on his pants tugging uncomfortably at his stomach, he took a deep sigh and wondered absently why they always chose to sit outside to eat in the frigid biting wind when they could all be huddled inside the Saloon in the warmth. Just as he was about to open his mouth and verbalise his thoughts, Shane let out a massive belch which made Jas' giggle echo from across the square. 

"Oh that was sooo good....." Rae moaned as she sat back in her chair, her head thrown back with pleasure. Harvey had to bite back a grin at the memory it conjured.

Probably best not to get thinking about that sort of thing right in the middle of the Feast, he reminded himself. Although it did make him already restless for the afternoon to end so they could head back to the farmhouse and spend some time alone. He hoped it would be the first of many Feasts where they'd waddle back to the farm together and snuggle up under a blanket with hot tea.

He twisted himself round in his chair as Lewis cleared his throat and announced it was time for the gift exchange. A chorus of cheers came from the children, both of whom had gifts from their families as well as their secret gift. They were the first to rush from their seats and practically slide down in front of the tree which had an entire section dedicated to each of them. The next sound was that of them ripping into their gifts with gusto, the voices of Marnie and Jodi calling at them to take it easy as they rushed over to control the mad unwrapping.

Shane lifted a box from down by his feet that was covered in more folded and torn sticky tape than blue paper and offered it to Harvey. He flushed with embarrassment as he stretched it across the table to him. 

"Thanks Doc. For everything. Pretty lucky I got you in this thing huh?" Harvey nodded and pulled away at the tape and paper to reveal a small furry mound. "It's a rabbit foot. Some say it's lucky." Shane looked across and shared a smile with Rae. "Though I think you're both pretty lucky already." 

Rae's expression didn't change at his admission and Harvey realised she'd come to the same conclusion as she had. There was no bitterness in Shane's voice. A sad acceptance as his shoulders slouched a little lower than he'd have liked maybe, but as Rae pushed her plate from in front of herself and reached over for Shane's lingering hand he softened. 

"Well I think I speak for both of us when we say we feel like the lucky ones to have you as our friend Shane." 

The man flushed and rolled his eyes dramatically. "So corny Rae..."

Rae grinned, stood up and wiped her hands on the napkin from her lap. She headed back to the tree and Harvey watched as she approached Leah and offered her the parcel. The artist ripped the paper off eagerly and, upon seeing its contents, threw her arms around Rae and engulfed her in a bear hug, the canvases pressing against both their bodies. Harvey sat in his chair as everyone began to stand up and remove their gifts from underneath the tree. Rae was too busy chatting to Leah about the paints she'd found to notice he was still sitting firmly in his seat. 

A bustle began as everyone looked for their gifts recipient and tore into their presents. Harvey looked around and couldn't help but grin at the squeals and excitement that everyone shared as they opened gifts that were meaningful and well chosen. If there was one benefit to living in a tiny town it was that there were no strangers; the Feast was proof of that. To live in a town where you could call most of the people in it your friend was a rarity that he was only now starting to appreciate. 

Vincent ran over, circling their table with a small wooden airplane that he was excited to share with Harvey. The doctor kneeled down to be close to him, explaining what all the parts of the plane were called. Vincent squealed with excitement and ran back to Jodi and Sam to relay all his new information.

Jas came to sit on Shane's lap and started putting her brand new purple hair bows in Shane's hair which he accepted readily. The pair shared a smile as she ran off cackling, leaving his hair adorned with tiny lavender coloured frills.

After a few minutes people started to sit down with their gifts, examining and playing with them and excitedly showing them to their dinner companions. Harvey watched as Rae looked around with anticipation, her face growing nervous as no one approached her with a gift. Before she became too uncomfortable Harvey rose from his chair and fetched the last small green parcel that lay underneath the tree. 

Rae stared at him with a look of wonder as he walked towards her and held out the box. 

"You got me?" She asked, her eyes twinkling and her mouth open.

"I did."

"Did you have a quiet word with Lewis then?" She giggled, her fingers smoothing over the sage coloured paper and its black velvet ribbon. 

"No, actually I got you completely by chance. Obviously, someone knew I really wanted to give you a gift." He wrung his hands gently behind his back as the worry of her not liking her gift suddenly washed over him. He just wanted her to open it now, to see it and give a response about whether he was completely off base with it. He looked down at the still unopened parcel. "Come on then..."

She pushed her finger under the wrapping paper and revealed the small hardwood box inside. She offered him the paper so she could open the box and, as she did, a tinkling melody drifted from inside and filled the air, turning the heads of some of the townspeople towards their exchange. 

As she saw what was inside she gasped, her mouth hanging open and eyes brimming with tears. She pulled out the gift and held it up in the light. 

"It's so beautiful," she whispered, holding the gemstone up, the sunshine glinting off the smooth surface and dancing around it as she moved the stone. "It's jade."

"It's exactly the same shade as your eyes..." 

When he'd found the stone in the sand by the beach he couldn't understand how it had come to be there. He'd asked Elliot if it was his but the writer had given a cryptic answer about finding jewels in unsuspecting places and wandered off. Harvey couldn't believe how exactly it had matched the eyes of his lover and, although he'd considered keeping it himself as a reminder of her when they were apart, when he'd received her name as his gift recipient he couldn't believe his luck and knew the gem had always been intended for her. 

Rae's eyes filled with tears as she smoothed her fingers over the polished surface of the gem. It was no bigger than a fingernail but was as perfect as gems got. "It's so beautiful Harvey. Thank you so much."

The music stopped playing as Rae closed the box and leaned in to Harvey, her free hand around his cheek and mouth covering his own. They kissed deeply, as though it was the first time they'd ever touched one another and Harvey felt his entire body warm at her taste. The world stilled around them as he drank her in and clasped her warm face in his hands. He felt her knees buckle slightly by his and ran his hands down to her waist to support her as their kiss deepened. She tasted of honey and wine and as he breathed her in he suddenly felt drunk at the luck that had brought the pair together. 

This time, when they separated, the villagers didn't have the wherewithal to even look away, so caught by the scene of the pairs embrace. The only ones who weren't staring were Jas and Vincent who'd run off to play with their toys.

Harvey flushed as he led Rae back to the table by the elbow. Well, that was definitely one way to confirm their status as a couple, he thought. Shortly after the murmur of conversations begun again as Rae sat down and held the gem firmly in her pocket. 

"I think I definitely need that rabbit foot back Doc. You're clearly already the luckiest bastard I know," laughed Shane. He began to shovel forkfuls of pie into his mouth as Harvey stared over at Rae.

Yep. Luckiest bastard in the world.


	28. Heart to Heart

Leah claimed she had only came by to drop off some clay that she'd promised Rae but the expectant look on her face when Rae opened the door made it clear there was more to discuss than some excess art supplies... After she'd handed over the clay she poked her head entirely plainly inside the living room, presumably to look for any other visitors.

Rae sighed deeply. "Would you like to come in and examine the place from the inside?"

Leah nodded and swung her coat off as she entered. The room was filled with the familiar scent of the cider Rae had just warmed on the stove and the slightly smoky smell the fireplace still gave off after nearly a year of use. She poured Leah a cup of cider without asking and the woman accepted it readily, warming her hands on the heat of the ceramic mug.

"Well?"

"Well what?" Rae asked innocently. She notched her head to the sofa and closed the curtains to the diminishing light outside. She turned back to see Leah's face pursed with anticipation as she leaned on the surface by the kitchen sink.

"You know exactly what I mean..." Her voice was low and rumbling and Rae couldn't help but smile at her complete inability to even pretend to be subtle.

"Well...." But before Rae could launch into the story of she and Harvey another loud knock at the door made the pair jolt. She offered Leah a confused look before opening the door once more to see Robin standing, her coat wrapped around her to brace from the wind.

"Hi...." Rae raised an eyebrow. Visitors to the farm were few and far between without an invitation. She loved having people over but two in the space of two minutes could never be thought of as coincidence. She looked around to Leah. "Was this you?"

The woman shook her head and claimed she had no idea Robin would be popping round either. "Just as well you made enough cider for all of us.....right?"

At least Robin had the good grace to look sheepish as Rae ushered her in from the falling snow. As Robin kicked off her boots by the door Rae turned around and offered the pair an exaggerated eye rise. "Anyone else coming....? She joked.

But her guests exchanged another look and Rae's shoulders fell. "Who else?"

"Maybe....Caroline?"

"Oh for Yoba's sake..." muttered Rae. She opened the door to peer out and, sure enough, the green haired woman was gleefully making her way up the path to the farm, shielding a large woven basket in her arms from the new snow. She waved at Rae as the farmer wondered whether Leah had indicated there was to be a bit of a gathering; there was no way she could claim it was all happenstance now...

As Caroline settled into the farmhouse and offered the basket to Rae (which, luckily for her contained Rae's very favourite blackberry pie) the farmer indicated they sit down at the kitchen table where they could all nurse their ciders together as she poured a further two mugs, finishing the pot.

 _Let the interrogation begin_...she thought to herself.

She looked around at her three friends, all of whom she was close enough to quite happily spill the beans to. Well, most of the beans to anyway. _Some beans were still private_.

"How long has it been going on?"

"Was yesterday your first kiss?"

"Have you slept with him yet?"

"Are you in love with him?"

"Do you think you will get married?"

"Does it not hurt to kiss someone with a moustache that bushy?"

Rae's expression remained deadpan as the three women abandoned any pretence of drinking their cider and threw questions at her from around the table. She didn't answer any, instead gently blowing on her drink and scratching Basil's head under the table where he sat waiting for any potential food drops. She waited until they'd got it all out of their system as each woman leaned in, waiting for a response.

She leaned back in the rickety wooden chair, relaxed and looked at Leah who'd asked the first rapid fire question. "I've liked him since I arrived in Pelican Town..."

"Well yeah we know that Rae..." Robin shook her head, grinning and taking a gulp from her mug. "You're like a teenager every time you're around him!" The women giggled and Rae took a long drink herself to steel her nerves.

“Well he didn't know!" She protested. The others giggled knowingly.

"That doesn't surprise me," Robin nodded. "It took me four months to convince Demetrius I liked him. And he's nowhere near as nervous and shy as the Doc..."

"I think the first time I told him was...Spirits Eve? No wait, that's not right because that's the first time we kissed..." The women squealed as Rae rolled her eyes good-heartedly. The smile faltered as a miserable memory crept back into her mind. "Actually, no. If we're being specific the first time I admitted I liked him, to his face, was the night of that really bad summer storm? He walked me home because he saw me all nervous about the damn weather and when we got back to the farmhouse I thought he was going to kiss me so I leaned in and....he ran away." She looked down at her mug, uncomfortable at the memory even now.

They’d never really discussed what had happened beyond his apology a few days afterwards. He told her he’d been nervous and worried he was misconstruing the situation. Since it was very like Harvey to worry about any level of spontaneity she’d accepted his reasoning and tried to bury the worries of self-doubt that plagued her when she examined the memory too closely.

The women scoffed. "He ran away?" Leah asked, incredulously.

Rae nodded. "We made up, obviously. But yeah it really wasn't good for a while. But we talked about it and we made up and we kissed at Spirits Eve."

"Where?" Caroline asked.

"In the maze...." she responded coyly. The women laughed. Caroline shook her head and laughed in her belly.

"I knew the two of you were acting shifty that night!" Rae remembered the look Caroline had given her that night when she saw her go into the maze and her pinks cheeked at the memory.

"So...." Leah smirked, her mind clearly heading into the gutter. "Have you....?"

Rae rolled her eyes and opened her mouth in an exaggerated yawn. "That's private...."

The three women cackled with laughter at her non response but Rae shot Leah a warning look to remind her not to go any further. The artist grudgingly respected it but Rae figured it was probably temporary. She'd poke her nose in again sooner or later. She rose to pour them a second mug of cider, the room spinning just enough to remind her how potent the alcohol was when it was heated. As she tilted it into their cups she realised they’d already gone through an entire bottle.

"So, leaving all the murky stuff to one side," Robin started, "do you think you....do you love him?"

Rae nodded and this time the women just smiled. "I think we live in a town too small for one night stands don't you think?"

The other two shot a look at Leah who dipped her face into her hot cider nervously. Rae hid a smile but set a mental note to remind herself to ask her more about that later as she sat back down and swirled her drink around in the mug.

"I do. Love him, I mean. He's so unlike anyone I've been with before. He's really sweet and generous and kind. He listens to me moan about things that anyone else would tell me to shut up about. And he rubs my back when I've had a hard day--"

Another shared look between the women.

"--and he's absolutely adorable to look at." She giggled to herself. She stood up and got a fresh bottle of cider from the fridge which she poured in the pan on the stove. The others shifted around to look towards her as she served the pie onto a place and grabbed some dishes from the cupboard. She suddenly felt the gnawing hunger that usually came with drinking.

"Do you think you'll get married?" Caroline asked, the cider working its way to banishing any shyness she’d previously felt at asking.

Rae shrugged. "We haven't talked about it I guess. But I can't imagine wanting to be married to anyone else right now I suppose. And I think a little kid that has my ridiculously huge hair and his glasses might be quite adorable!"

She offered the women a slice of pie and they sat in silence for a few moments, munching away and drinking the dregs of their cider as the new pot bubbled on the stove, wafting the kitchen with it’s reassuring apple scent.

Rae thought about Harvey as she looked across to the table where her newly received jade sat in it's intricate music box. She had a sudden pang of concern that she was gossiping which she knew he'd hate. But these were her best friends. They were going to ask these questions sooner or later right? She looked at the group of women around her and her breath hitched with emotion. Not only had she found her soul mate in the last few months, a man that she truly did imagine herself being with until she grew old, but she finally had a group of friends she could share her excitement with. She'd always been painfully aware of the romantic shaped hole she'd had in her life in the city but hadn't really noticed the lack of a friendship group until she'd come to Pelican Town. The four women sitting around the table seemed to be other three pieces of the jigsaw she never realised was missing.

While Leah and she were extraordinarily close, she recognised that Caroline and Robin were also starting to join them to make a tight knit group of women who cared about one another in a more genuine way than she'd ever thought possible. Friendship groups she'd been part of in the city were generally made up of people with a similar interest, normally drinking, and she'd never felt for a lack of close companionship. But looking around at her support network she wondered how she ever managed without them. Leah had professed that until Rae came to town the three had only a passing and casual friendship, made up solely of polite waves and conversation. It seemed the farmer was the magnet in this particular coven.

Rae stood up (more carefully this time) to get the now bubbling cider from the heat and poured it into her friends cups with more concentration than was normally required. Leah shifted in her seat.

"So, the most important question. Does it feel weird to kiss a guy with a moustache?"

She said it so rapidly in her cider fuelled curiosity that the four women dissolved into a fit of giggles. Rae shook her head dramatically. "No! It burns a little bit sometimes but normally it's pretty nice actually. He's a very very good kisser..." She cooed.

She thought back to the last kiss she'd given him as he left for work that morning. They'd spent the last four nights in a row staying at the farmhouse together and had already fallen into a relaxed morning routine of Rae getting up early, feeding the animals and throwing a stick for Basil before crawling into bed to warm back up next to Harvey as he slowly woke for the day. Harvey did not enjoy the waking up process, she’d discovered. She'd make him a cup of strong black coffee and the two would snuggle with one another as they nursed their hot drinks and enjoyed the closeness of one another.

Any awkwardness between the couple had disappeared in the last few days. She'd obviously assumed that they'd become relaxed with one another after a time but in only a few short days they now woke up next to one another and effortlessly fell into a routine that reflected their newly relaxed relationship. She'd marvelled at Harvey walking around the farmhouse completely nude the day before without even batting an eyelid and realised it felt as though they'd been together for years. She'd always worried that when she found Someone Special that she'd instantly miss her old single life with its hedonism and freedom. It was just like Rae to want something for the longest time then get bored the instant she got it. But this was different.

"I'm really pleased for you Rae." Caroline admitted. "But I'm just _so_ pleased for Harvey as well. He's an absolutely lovely person - the two of you are so well suited. He really deserved someone just like you."

The drawling sincerity with which she said it made Rae's eyes shine with emotion. "I'm pretty sure I'm the lucky one."

They sat in a few moments of comfortable silence, drinking the last of their cider. The women looked around Rae's recently upgraded farmhouse with its new kitchen and Leah complimented Robin on her work, hinting that she might have to consider an extension to her own house in the near future. Maybe a dedicated art room, she mused. She didn’t have much need for a big kitchen.

"Well I better get back," started Caroline, downing the last of the tepid liquid in her cup. "If I leave Pierre and Abigail together alone too long there won't be a house to get back to." She was joking but even Rae had noticed the tension between the father and daughter and offered the woman a sympathetic look. She'd watched Caroline trying to mediate the strain between the two and could see the stress it was creating for her as well.

As she rose the women all startled as there sounded a knock on the door that echoed through the otherwise silent house. Rae dropped her cup into the sink and moved to the door, opening it a chink and peering around the edge. She smiled and pushed the door the whole way to show Harvey standing in the doorway, bouquet of wildflowers in his hand and stunned expression on his face. He stood with his mouth open into his scarf for a few seconds before umming and aahhing a response.

"Oh, uh. Sorry. I didn't realise you were....sorry Rae I can...." She grabbed his arm and tugged him inside out of the falling snow and into the spotlight in front of her friends. All three stared at him with sharp smiles on their faces and slightly cocked and curious eyebrows. He took a large gulp of breath and fiddled with the snow dappled wildflowers as the three inspected him. Rae shook her head and extended her hand.

"Are those for me?" He pulled his gaze away from the others and offered them out to her. "They're beautiful. Thank you Harvey." No one in the room moved and he hovered, his huge winter coat still covering his slight frame and his hands wringing uncomfortably behind his back. "The ladies were just leaving."

They all clucked and finished their drinks, holding their mugs out to Rae who grabbed them in her free hand and used them to indicate the door gently.

All three slung their coats on slowly, looking back to the doctor but eventually moved out into the cold night air, saying their goodbyes and stumbling tipsily as they wandered off down the track. Rae turned back to Harvey who remained statue-like in the middle of the room, his mouth still hanging open and his eyebrows in a puzzled V in his forehead. As she turned the room spun and the realisation that she’d had nearly an entire bottle of cider to herself made her twinge with regret. It also made her gaze towards him with a bit more of a schoolgirl crush expression that she might otherwise have liked.

Eventually Harvey cleared his throat. "Sorry Rae, I should have called before coming over. I didn't realise you were having guests."

"Neither did I until they turned up." She filled a clay vase with water and sunk the wildflowers in, pulling them apart gently and fluffing them. She sat the vase in the middle of the recently vacated kitchen table and turned to her visitor. "Are you planning on taking off your jacket?"

He wrenched it off, droplets of water flecking the wooden floors as he handed it to Rae awkwardly. “So...what were you...I mean did you.....” He rolled his eyes at his own nervousness and looked around for a distraction as though the line of questions was to be entirely innocent.

Rae turned from the coat hooks and her heart knotted at his embarrassment. She wrapped her arms around his back, looking up into his steamed glasses and nervous eyes. “We weren’t gossiping Harvey. The girls asked me some questions but I wasn’t telling them anything sordid. Only how much I love you and think you’re perfect.”

He wriggled under her but she felt his shoulders relax as he looked down at her searching, dark eyes. He let out a bark of a laugh. “I’m definitely not perfect,” he admitted as he lowered his mouth on hers for their first kiss of the evening.

She breathed into him and pulled his body closer, if it were possible, and trailed a finger along the inside of his pants waistline at his back, feeling his muscles tense. He tasted of coffee which mingled with the spiced apple taste of her own mouth and she considered not answering him but knew she didn’t want his self-doubt to be the last words between them...

She broke away, his eyes betraying his desperation to keep continue the embrace but he settled for the fingers she was gently pushing further underneath his belt. “You’re right. You’re not perfect. You’re perfect for me.” It wasn’t the first time she’d said it but certainly the first time she’d said it since she realised every part of her absolutely needed and loved him.

His discomfort washed from his expression as he offered her a more relaxed and chaste kiss, his lips barely brushing against her own. Their foreheads touched and she stayed there for a few seconds, breathing him in. The alcohol was making her head fog more than she’d have liked but it was as though seeing him here, emotionally bare and more self-conscious than ever and wanted to wrap him up and convince him he wasn’t the person his brain was trying to convince him of.

She smiled and tugged at his hand as she pulled him gently towards the bedroom. “How much wine have you had?” He asked.

“Cider.” She corrected. “Not enough that you have to worry about taking advantage but definitely enough that I want to see your naked body in the next five minutes.”

Harvey laughed and through the fog of the alcohol she thought it was the nicest sound she’d ever heard.


	29. Unexplained Mystery

She’d woken up to a glass of tepid slightly bubbled water on the nightstand, a strip of painkillers and a scrawled note from Harvey saying she looked like she could use the extra sleep so he hadn’t woken her when he left for work. As she lifted her head from the slightly damp pillow to examine the drugs her head objected with force and she rested it back down, her stomach churning and chest thumping. 

_Only a bottle and a half of cider Rae? You’re getting old._

She pulled the sheets higher over her head but the heat in the room made the little fort feel like a closing sauna to her hangover and she realised getting up was the only way she could possibly salvage her day; delicate a procedure though it might prove to be.

Her head felt like it was wrapped in leather as she knocked back the painkillers via the glass of water and watched Basil snore gently on the end of her bed. Was it possible to be jealous of a dog, she asked herself as she compared her own sorry state to the dogs peaceful slumber. 

Tugging the slightly sweaty sheets from the bed and nudging Basil to the floor she smacked her already dry lips and took a gulp of thick, stale air. The sheets became a makeshift toga as she shuffled her way to the kitchen to satisfy the craving her body had for fresh liquid. 

At least she remembered the whole night and hadn’t done anything stupid, she reassured herself. Although when Harvey had arrived she’d asked him if he felt like a drink so another bottle was opened. The last time she’d felt this rough after a night of drinking was nearly a decade ago after a night filled with wine, then cocktails, then wine again... She’d had easily five times as much to drink that night she’d gone out with her work colleagues and had recovered entirely the next morning after ordering pizza and swigging pints of cold soda.

What was it about heating alcohol that made it much more dangerous, she mused through the misery.

Yesterday evening Harvey had sensibly declined any more than a single mug of the cider but Rae breezily opted for a further two, spurred on by the previous three she’d enjoyed with her friends. 

Breakfast was definitely on the cards. Her stomach might object initially but experience definitely indicated as soon as the food got into her system she’d feel like a different person. A small part of her wondered if Harvey might have made something and left it but creeping disappointment set in as she entered an abandoned and unused kitchen. 

The snow had cleared further in the night she could see from the window and there were virtually no white patches on the ground at all. Winter was finally coming to an end, she mused as she lifted some bacon rashers from the fridge and threw a knob of butter onto a heating pan. 

She bustled around clumsily for twenty minutes preparing a fully cooked breakfast before sitting at the dining table while nausea argued with the rational part of her brain that reminded her that eating would make her feel better. She flipped the dial on the radio, reasoning the music might provide a cheerful background to her recovery breakfast. Instead the rumbling saxophone that blared out the tiny speakers was quickly shut off as the low bass went straight to her floored out stomach. 

—

The first she noticed the jade was missing was when Basil knocked the table in a fit of excitement when she offered him some of the bacon she’d casually heaped onto her plate. When the table shook and the music box had been knocked ajar, playing it’s haunting and melodic tune she’d gone over to snap it shut, hissing at the sharp pain it caused in her temples, she noticed a lack of green glint coming from inside.

She nudged open the box fully and as the mechanical tune began to play louder, any singe of pain she’d experienced was forgotten as she gasped at its emptiness. 

_Where was her jade?_

She’d seen it the previous afternoon when tidying up the living room but couldn’t figure out what could possibly had happened to it. Sure, she and the girls had a little more to drink than she’d been expecting but surely she’d remember taking the gem from its box and putting it somewhere else? Had she taken it out and shown it to them? She searched her slightly foggy memory but realised she hadn’t had enough to drink that she’d be forgetting things. And she certainly hadn’t shown it off to anyone.

The only other people who had been in the house between her seeing it last and now were Robin, Leah and Caroline. And she was absolutely certain none of them would have taken it. It wasn’t even a particularly large gem, about the size of a fingernail, so certainly didn’t have any real monetary value. It had been chosen because of the exacting colour match to her eyes and the complete chance of Harvey saving it from the crashing waves on the beach.

She searched the floor around the bottom of the table, pushing both it and the TV out of the way to look into every tiny shadow. Surely Basil had just knocked it out of the box somehow and it had gone onto the floor? It would have had to actually bounce out, she reasoned. But where the hell else could it be? Her eyes searched around the wooden planks that lay unevenly on the floor, assuming the glint off the lamp would catch her eye. But nothing. 

A further uneasy twist in her stomach pulled at her as she realised no one had been in the farmhouse but her friends. Well, and Harvey, but he was the one that gave her the jade. No reason for him to move it.

She got back on her hands and knees, head flipping at the movement, and ran her hands along the cold wooden floor, hoping desperately that she’d feel it underneath the wires of the TV or by the legs of the table. Still nothing. 

Ten difficult minutes passed as she hunted around the area but found nothing. She tried to stop the tears from welling in her eyes but as soon as the first tremble passed across her lips she knew the emotion would soon spill from her chest. 

And it did. The tears glassed over her eyes and she sobbed as she continued to look fruitlessly. 

“It’s not here”, she told herself. “You’d have found it ages ago if it were.”

She sat back on her haunches, tears making rivers down her hot red cheeks and put her face in her hands, her body shivering with tears. Harvey was going to be so hurt that she’d lost it already. She’d barely had it two days!

She looked up to Basil who sat in front of her, his mouth drawn into a giant grin as his tongue spilled out and his breath came out in great pants.

“Did you get it boy?” She pushed the tears away with the sleeve of her sweater and gave an almighty sniff, her raging headache either forgotten in the panic or starting to be appeased by the tablets. “Did you eat it?”

The thing to know about Basil was that he had a fairly revealing guilty face. If he’d done something he shouldn’t have, it was pretty easy to tell as he slunk his tail between his legs and looked down at the ground. But today he simply looked at her with his typical goofy face and Rae knew there and then he didn’t have anything to do with the loss.

She must have taken it out, she reasoned, and she stood up and grabbed her coat.

Outside the snow had ceased but she thought back to the night before where it had started coming down in sheets not long after she and Harvey had retreated to the bedroom. If there was any chance it had ended up outside would she find it under any of the newly landed snow?

The sun was blazing down from the clear blue sky and she saw puddles of slush forming around the bottoms of the fence posts. Spring really was coming; though she’d rather not wait until the snow had passed before finding it.

She pulled her gloves from her coat pockets, slipped them on and hunched down to the ground, brushing away snow and feeling carefully for a hard lump among the tiny snow dunes. She looked up to see the cows watching her closely from their locked paddock. She explained to them what she was looking for but they all continued to plod around, barely giving her another look. 

She stood up and, again, began to cry. How was she even going to explain this to Harvey? Keeping quiet about it wasn’t an option. Even if she thought she might have got away with it she’d have felt so uneasy keeping something like this from him. No, she’d have to tell him it was gone. 

The sick feeling rose in her stomach as she realised it had been a couple of hours since lunch and he was probably finishing up at the clinic. She retreated back to where she’d left the front door to the farmhouse wide open and slammed it noisily, the resulting thunder in her head far less significant than it had been an hour before. 

She’d go meet him at the clinic and tell him how sorry she was that she’d been so damn careless. There really wasn’t anything else she could do...

—

“It’s gone?” Harvey looked at her through his glasses with an emotion Rae couldn’t quite place. His face was twisted in such a way that she was certain he was trying to cover up his vast disappointment in her. 

The clinic was empty; Sam had just left after his appointment as Rae had come in and Maru had obviously gone home early. The reception area reeked of cleaning solution with an aftertaste of sweet tang that Rae reasoned might be cough syrup. The soft jazz that Harvey liked to play floated through the music system and continued to sound out a slow and haunting piano piece that made Rae feel even more uncomfortable. It was as though the song was mocking her with its slow pace and relentless drawl.

She nodded. “I’m so sorry.” Her hands trembled as she twisted them together in an attempt to calm herself. “I don’t even know how it’s got out of the box. I must have taken it out or something and I’ve misplaced it. I’m so sorry.” She repeated. 

Harvey swallowed as he held out his hands for hers and looked off her gaze. “Don’t worry Rae. It was just a stone. We’ll get you another one.”

She eyes narrowed as she stared down at the ground. She’d been worried this would happen. It would have been much easier to confront her own damn stupidity if he’d just shouted at her in frustration. Or hell, even just been outwardly disappointed in her. Instead he was being supportive and kind about it all. 

_The bastard._

He took her hand, reminded her that it wasn’t the end of the world and sat with her on the waiting room chairs as she whimpered, then tried to convince him she was just feeling fragile from the hangover. But he knew her well enough to know there was more at play than some excess alcohol. 

Each sniff just further served to aggravated her already aggravated head and she leaned into him, hoping her breath didn’t still smell of sour cider. 

As though reading her mind he leaned in for a kiss and for the first time her stomach didn’t do a dance as a new scent hit her nostrils. He smelled of mint and clean and fresh; just what her body needed. 

“Honestly Rae. It’s not worth getting this upset about. We’ll figure it out. I’m sure it will turn up.” She nodded at his gentle enthusiasm and rolled her eyes; another lapse that served as a reminder that her the painkillers needed renewed.

She thanked him with an eager kiss and left him to finish off his paperwork. As she headed for the door he nervously suggested another evening together. 

“Any evening.” She smiled. “Every evening if you like.”

She didn’t wait for his response but pulled the door behind her and headed back towards the empty farmhouse with only a slightly elevated step than she’d left with.

—

The TV had been idling away for nearly an hour and Rae was now on her sixteenth ‘just another quick glance around in case I’ve missed it’ look around the room. 

Still nothing. 

The low winter sun gently sunk behind the horizon outside, casting the room in deep orange light and creeping shadows. She pulled the lilac knitted quilt around her feet which were starting to numb with the dropping temperatures and finished the dregs from her cup of tepid tea, switching off the banality of the fashion show she’d only been half watching. 

Her standing to get another cup coincided with a rapping at the door. She wasn’t quite sure why he bothered to knock anymore. She’d reminded him time and time again to come right in but he’d grown flustered and told her he didn’t want to intrude on her space.

As she wrapped her hand around the door handle her stomach niggled at the thought of seeing him again. Would he be disappointed? Would his anger have risen in the hours since he’d seen her? Or would it never be mentioned again and slowly but surely become the elephant in the room whenever they exchanged gifts?

The whipping cold wind nipped in at the door as she pulled it open to see him bundled up and woolly hatted on the wet porch. The snow might be going but it certainly wasn’t much warmer. She could still see the hot air emerge as a steamy cloud from his mouth as he smiled at her and stepped into the much warmer living room. 

She peeled off his outerwear silently and hung his scarf on the hooks before turning to offer him a cup of tea from the recently boiled kettle. What she saw stopped her in her tracks. 

Harvey stood before her, his hands outstretched but shaking slightly as he offered her a tiny red box. She looked at it curiously and reached out for it; listening to his breathing become as shaky as his hands. Had he got her something to replace the lost gem?

The box snapped open and inside lay a thin metal strap with an oval shaped jade nestled among three thin claws. _Her jade. No doubt about it._

She let out a relieved squeal and lunged towards Harvey; one hand grasping desperately at the box and the other gripped around his waist. She pulled him into her until she could barely breathe before releasing him and staring down at the ring. She recognised it the second she saw it; the green was an entirely distinctive shade she’d never noticed herself in the mines. Yoba knows where it had come from washed up on the beach like Harvey said. 

“You took it?” She whispered, still staring down at it and running her finger gently across the newly smooth surface. 

He nodded. “I didn’t think you’d notice it was gone actually. Thought Clint might have a few days to turn it into the thing I’d originally imagined. But, of course, you being you noticed it right away. So he’s spent the entire day doing nothing else so you’d....” He blushed a deep red and looked at the ground nervously. “I’m sorry I’ve caused you to worry all day. It was supposed to be a nice surprise.”

Her green eyes filled with tears she didn’t even know she had left as she lifted the ring from its plush purple velvet pillow and nipped it on the end of her ring finger of her right hand. She looked up at him with a elated sniff as he cleared his throat and stepped forward, pushing it further down onto her finger and clasping her hand in both of his. His hand was icy with the cold but felt as though it was quickly melting in her own.

“It’s a promise ring. I mean it’s not...” He cleared his throat again and shuffled his feet. “Is that a little corny? I don’t know. But I do know I promise to love you forever Rae. I’m not going to lie, I still think you deserve better than me...” She opened her mouth to protest but he shook his head. “There are so many things I'm frightened of Rae, so many things I really thought I'd never do. But if I can kiss you and hold you and be with you then I feel like I've got over the scariest thing in my life. I might still be a coward but knowing you're here with me makes me OK with that. The least I can do is love you forever.”

His eyes were sincere and pools of liquid began to form behind his thick glasses. Rae leaned in for a deep but slightly sniffling kiss, their noses brushing against one another as they tried to focus on each others lips instead of the threatening tears. Rae pulled away, leaving her wet cheek resting against his own and looking down at the ring that fit just perfectly on her finger. She had to tear her eyes from it to look up into Harvey’s.

“I can’t imagine anything I’d like to have more than this.” She let out a half laugh. “Is _that_ corny?”

“Probably.” He joked as he ran his hand over her back in reassuring circles. “But we can both be corny together, alone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One final chapter....


	30. A New Year

She’d never given much thought to what sort of sleeper Harvey would be, but given his anxious demeanour through day to day life she’d half have expected him to fidget all night, wrap himself up in sheets as he tossed and turned or only get a few hours sleep as his restlessness kept him from getting a good nights sleep.

It turned out it was none of those things.

Instead, from the first night he slept at the farmhouse, Harvey tangled himself around Rae’s body and slept soundly until the 5am weather report from Rae’s alarm clock woke him the next morning. Even then he’d make a growling sound to indicate he’d heard it but would inevitably roll over and drift off to sleep until she came to wake him an hour and a half later.

The alarm continued to be set despite the lack of early work to do in the winter, but instead of getting up and feeding the animals or tending the crops before the sun got too high, Rae would press her body in even closer to him under the thin sheets and gaze at him for a few minutes before lapsing back into sleep herself.

And on the first morning of spring, exactly a year after she’d arrived in Pelican Town on an the old bus that clattered to a half on the stop by the farm, she did just that. She’d been so damn scared about it all; the entire bus journey had been spent worrying that such a small and closed community wouldn’t accept her or that she’d be bored in five minutes. But they had accepted her and she hadn’t been bored once. The villagers welcomed her into the flock and in the short span of a year she’d gained close friends, a thriving farm and a dog that tried to jump on top of the kitchen counters just because he could.

And the doctor snoring gently next to her. He was definitely the highlight of the things she’d landed herself over the last year.

Her mouth stretched into a yawn and she touched his cheek with her straying fingers. Watching his chest rise and fall in his sleep next to her was one of her new favourite things. But just as she turned delicately in the bed, careful not to wake him, she felt him stir next to her anyway and stared at him over her naked shoulder.

The golden sunlight touched everything with its fingers, casting the room in a sea of light. It looked almost heavenly, mused Rae as she watched Harvey stir.

One reluctant eye opened. Then another. He squinted at the sunlight that flooded the room and groaned as he pushed his endearingly stubbled face under Rae’s pillow.

“Definitely spring then...” he mumbled from under the pillow. She ran her hand along his exposed arm and lay back down next to him, their faces nearly touching as he emerged from his hiding place.

“Certainly is. I’m pretty sure that if I look outside virtually all the snow will be gone too.”

“That means you’re going to start getting up earlier right?” He complained.

Rae laughed but her nod was sympathetic. “You know Harvey, I didn’t take you for such a late sleeper!”

He linked his arms above his head and stretched them towards the ceiling, moaning with relief and leaned across to grab his glasses from the bedside table. He propped them on his face and offered her a wide grin as she presumably turned from a fuzzy mass of colours into an actual, real life person.

“Well until recently I found it difficult to go to sleep. So getting out of bed was always hard. But now...” he smiled and pulled Rae into him, the feel of his warm skin against hers making prickles of delight appear on her arms and back. “Now I get plenty sleep but still don’t want to get out of bed.”

She giggled and swatted his roaming hand. “Well we have to I’m afraid. First day of spring....lots to do.” His face fell as she rose from the bed, grabbed her discarded t-shirt from the floor and the night before and slung it over her shoulders. Her hair twisted into a knot at the top of her head and she secured it with the band that was digging a thin red welt into her wrist. Basil greeted her with enthusiasm as she entered the kitchen.

As she tousled his scruff she called back to the bedroom, offering coffee which he readily accepted. Harvey following her into the living room, still securing his pants around his waist by their ancient zipper. Rae loved that he was comfortable enough to wander around the farmhouse half naked and, although he was still obviously a little nervous about his bony hips and self proclaimed ‘bird arms’, it only made her happier that he no longer worried about her judging him. It also made her more than a little indulgently satisfied to think that his gorgeous body had been in her bed for the last four nights in a row.

She handed him a steaming black mug of caffeine and added milk to her own before knocking back a deep and satisfying mouthful. Resting her hips against the kitchen counter she flipped on the radio which confirmed her suspicions that the snow had finally abandoned Stardew Valley and that the weather predicted for the day was a balmy and cloudless warm spring day.

“Doesn’t get much better than this.” She winked at him as he headed to the bathroom for a shower.

As soon as she heard the water flowing and Harvey humming loudly over the sound of the boiler whirring to life she tidied up their abandoned dinner dishes from the night before and tossed them in the sink before busying herself making breakfast.

When he emerged ten minutes later, hair tousled with water droplets and body smelling like her violet scented shampoo, she only allowed herself a half second of admiration and affection before setting down two omelettes and glasses of orange juice.

He tucked in readily, as though he hadn’t eaten in days, and hummed with satisfaction as the flavours hit him.

“In only a few days I’ve gone from hellish microwave dinners to freshly cooked breakfasts made with produce that’s come from about twenty feet away.” He looked at her with hooded eyes behind his glasses. “I wonder what I did to get this lucky?”

She scoffed and took a bite from her own plate. It did taste good. Had she really become so accustomed to growing and making her own food that she’d forgotten how a year ago she herself was buying vacuum packed meals and thinking of them as fuel instead of food?

They sat in easy silence for the five minutes it took them to finish their omelettes. A comfortable and relaxed meal with the occasional finger brushing or sly glance. After the plates were cleaned and the very dregs of the coffee was consumed he brushed his lips against hers, a lingering goodbye that neither of them wanted to make was made and he headed out the door just in enough time to get to the clinic for his first appointment at 9am.

As Rae followed him out and watched him stroll down the path into town, she chided herself when she realised how utterly and foolishly dependant on him she was already.

—

A second shower had been necessary before she went to meet Harvey after his shift.

The morning had been spent preparing the soil for planting the next day and it had proved to be back breaking work. Although as she thought back to the year before, when her muscles hadn’t become attuned to physical labour yet she was pleased to note she got about four times as much work done in the same time. Her hips still jutted a bit too much for her liking and her stomach still paunched at the front, but her arms and legs had grown stronger and her energy levels compared to her arrival were like night and day.

When she looked up just after lunchtime, her calves cramping and arms numb with exertion, she called it a day and gave the chickens a final check before allowing herself a steamy shower. Her muscles were very grateful when the hot water washed over them and the relief was instantaneous.

Rummaging around in her entirely disorganised closet she grabbed one of her more summery dresses, a yellow slip with blue stitching, and slipped on a pair of flat pumps. She tossed the winter boots to the back behind her sandals and work boots.

“Hopefully won’t see you guys for a while...” She whispered to them.

She wandered into town in a dream like state. Any evidence of snow had completely melted in the night and the trees looked green and lush as tiny buds appeared through the dirt in the grass. Birdsong offered a perfect soundtrack to her journey as her basket rocked gently on her elbow, soon to be filled with seeds for the upcoming season.

The air was filled with showers of pale pink blossoms as they floated from the trees and seemed to dance gracefully in the air. Rae didn’t even pick off the errant petals as they landed on her shoulders and sprinkled her with their spring attitude.

As she cleared the path into town the first thing to hit her was a mouth-watering scent that she couldn’t quite place. The smell of food permeated the otherwise fresh air and as she moved past the trees noticed that most of the villagers were standing in huddles in the town square.

Tables had been set out in front of Pierre’s and smoke rose in plumes from the centre of a crowd of people huddled around the Saloon. The flip down tables were already all set, laden with pitchers of water, juice and what seemed to be punch. Yellow and red bottles that dotted the tables reminded Rae of better times with her family when her mother and father would jokingly argue of the benefits of mustard vs ketchup. It was one of the few pleasant memories of her she’d come up with since she’d made the upheaval from the city.

Harvey emerged from the clinic and clicked the door lock behind him before smiling at Rae’s arrival.

“What’s going on?” She asked, pointing at the crowds.

“Impromptu barbecue it seems.” He kissed her readily without looking around for prying eyes as he’d have done only a week before. As his lips pulled away Rae noticed, not for the first time, how much of his nervousness had vanished in recent days. For the first time since she’d known him he was relaxed, his shoulders weren’t tensed and he seemed genuinely comfortable in the crowd of villagers. “Gus said he had a bunch of food that was going to go bad in a few days so suggested we might all get together for dinner. Do you want to join everyone?”

Rae nodded and placed the empty basket in front of the clinic door to collect later. She’d just have to fetch seeds the next day, she thought to herself. Suddenly it just didn’t seem as urgent as it had ten minutes before.

Harvey linked her hand in his confidently as they began towards Robin, Demetrius and Lewis who were having an animated discussion about tables and chairs. Rae rolled her eyes at Harvey as the Mayor’s voice begun to raise a few octaves above its normal tone.

“I understand it’s all very friendly and neighbourly to do this but it’s traditional to propose a new event during a town meeting and send notices out a few days in advance. We could have had flyers! We could have organised music. This is all rather.... _spontaneous_!” He spat the last word as though there was poison in his mouth and Robin crossed her arms and offered him a raised eyebrow.

“That’s all fine for annual festivals and get togthers but I think it’s OK to occasionally do something off the cuff.”

“I agree Lewis,” began Demetrius, his arm linking around his wife’s. “And when better to do it than a beautiful spring day like this?”

Lewis made a growl in his throat as he rubbed his head under his hat and shook his head, looking around to his most likely ally. “Surely Harvey you agree with me? These things need to be planned out, don’t they?”

Harvey offered him an easier smile than he’d ever managed and shrugged. “I don’t know.” He side-eyed Rae mischievously. “Maybe we all should start worrying less about things that aren’t really that important and start focusing on the things that matter. Like being together.” He squeezed Rae’s hand.

Rae flushed slightly and had to hold back a giggle as Lewis finally barked out an angry laugh and stormed off to where a sympathetic Marnie stood taking handfuls of nuts from a bowl by Gus.

Robin turned her gaze back to Rae and Harvey and snuggled in even closer to her husband. “You two are looking happy.” She looked up to Demetrius. “Remember that brand new love look we used to give each other?” She squeezed his arm tighter as he shook his head at her and offered a mock indignant look.

“Don’t be silly. I’ve never been anything other than completely rational about our relationship.” He offered Rae a wink and pulled Robin away towards where Abigail stood with Sebastian, pouring cans of cola into red plastic cups.

“Let’s go get some food before Shane eats it all.” She suggested.

They wandered over to their friend who was eating burgers in three mouthful actions. He paused for a moment when he saw the couple and wiped his mustard tipped mouth with the underside of his sleeve.

A glance that could barely be seen flitted down to their joined hands and back up with a slightly weathered expression on his face. No one acknowledged it and instead Rae leaned over to pass a paper plate to Harvey. She moved to put some cheese slices on Harvey’s plate when he suddenly whipped his plate towards himself.

“No thanks. I really hate cheese.” Rae raised an eyebrow and nodded.

“Wait,” her mind whirred. “What about that night you made the artichoke cheddar soup for us?”

His cheeks burned at her question and his expression grew sheepish. “I, uh, well I knew you would like it so I guess I just....ate it anyway?”

She offered him a pained look but guessed she would have done the same for him in other circumstances. She mouthed a sorry to him which prompted a grin.

“Burgers good then?” She asked Shane, heaping a bun onto her plate and onto Harvey’s without asking. He nodded and grabbed a can of soda from the bucket of ice behind him. Rae waved to a grinning Jas who sided up next to Shane as she held her plate out to Gus who was offering meat from the grill. “How you doing Jas?”

The young girl nodded excitedly and, without answering, squeaked up to Shane. “Will you come and play hide and seek with me and Vincent?” She pulled at his arm and gave him a pleading look as he took a long draw of the soda then burped loudly. Rae could feel Lewis’ disapproval from across the square.

“You guys look happy.” He muttered. “I’m, uh, happy you’re happy.”

Rae didn’t get a chance to respond as Jas finally pulled him away and Shane joined the kids in a slightly haphazard game of hide and seek.

Rae bit her lip and filled her chest with a heavy breath. Nothing was going to make her feel better about the Shane situation other than time. She hated to think of him being uncomfortable around she and Harvey but in a town with only a few dozen villagers it was inevitable that the three would see each other often. She could only hope his feelings would dissipate over time.

Harvey didn’t seem as affected by Shane’s words as he piled his burger high with salad and ketchup and took a huge bite, spilling sauce down the sides of his mouth. Rae rolled her eyes good-naturedly as he wiped it off with the back of his thumb. The pleasure she was seeing in him from insignificant things truly showed how happy he now seemed to be.

She popped some cheese on her own burger and bit into it. It really was pretty good, she realised. Not for the first time she wondered if Gus’ culinary talents were a little wasted on Pelican Town. Long may he continue though, she thought.

They stood in silence with their food, observing the conversations of the other villagers. Lewis was the only one complaining about the gathering; even George was cackling wildly at Shane’s antics as he tried desperately to shimmy up a tree to hide from Jas’ oddly accurate finding skills. Rae chuckled along with him between bites of food and as Jas shouted she was coming to find him Shane fell ass first from midway up the tree and landed in a bush underneath. He groaned and rolled over, holding his backside as virtually all the onlookers lost their composure at him. He looked up and grinned at Jas’, throwing his arms around her as she ran towards him and engulfing her in a huge bear hug that made Rae’s heart swell.

“He’s going to be fine.” Harvey said, his hand on her shoulder reassuringly. “It’ll take a little time but he’ll be fine.”

Rae wasn’t sure if Harvey was referring to his feelings for her or his struggle with alcohol. But either way she was sure he was right. Time would fend off Shane’s demons until soon enough he was strong enough to fend them off himself.

Lewis chinked his spoon against his wine glass which got everyone’s attention. He looked around reluctantly until Marnie nudged his side and he forced a great smile.

“Thank you for coming to our _extremely_ impromptu barbecue everyone.” A few groans echoed through the square but he fluffed his chest and looked around more genuinely. “It is nice to have everyone together now that the weather has turned pleasant. So I’d like to make a little toast.” He raised his glass and the villagers raised their glasses and red plastic cups in unison. “Here’s to Pelican Town. We might be small in the grand scale of things but we’ve got one another. And, well, I think that’s a lot more important. To us all!”

A chorus of agreement sounded as people took a drink and looked around at one another fondly.

He was right. A year ago Rae had landed in Pelican Town thinking she’d last a month at most before getting bored as hell and selling the farm. She could never have predicted that these people would become her friends. _Her family_.

“Fancy leaving now we’ve made an appearance and stolen some free food?” Harvey asked. Rae nodded in agreement and after thanking Gus for the spread they walked back to the farm hand in hand, fingers twisted around each other’s as Harvey gently rubbed the jade ring with his thumb.

—

Their evening was relaxed. Lounging, chatting, listening to music, an unintentional slow dance in the kitchen. They giggled with one another as they went about tidying the farmhouse and winked at each other every so often just to remind the other their thoughts weren’t entirely pure.

As evening drew in and the sun melted into the horizon, pulling the heat from the air, the pair sat wrapped in Rae’s quilt and read quietly next to one another. Harvey had been teased over his choice of reading material, a thick and heavy medical textbook he claimed was compelling, and Rae had snuggled down under the quilt with Elliot’s latest draft of the romance novel she’d convinced him to write.

After a while Rae found herself distractedly looking at Harvey more often than her pages; she’d read the same sentence four times now which prompted a question in her mind.

Rae leaned into Harvey and whispered to him a question that made his breath catch in his throat and look down at her earnestly, his thick eyebrows hatching together. “Of course.”

“Good.” She tugged at his arm as she stood. “Let’s go to bed.”

The pair walked through to the now breezy bedroom with its empty fireplace, and lay on the bed next to one another. Rae picked at Harvey’s shirt absently as he lay on his side, watching her.

“I’m really glad you decided to stick around in town.” He whispered.

“I don’t think I could have ever left after I met you.”

He pulled her closer and breathed into her neck. “Let’s do this forever.” He murmured absently, his eyes heavy and closing with fatigue.

“At least that long.” She breathed back to him, her own green eyes already closed.

And they did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to every single person who's read this, particularly those who have left kudos. I'm surprised at how sad I am to be finished with Rae and Harvey's story so there may be one shots etc in the future. 
> 
> Thanks all!! :)


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